May 22, 2016 9:26 AM GMT
Interesting interview about how the «fit, masc, Caucasian» standard (not only of beauty, but of how the way Gay culture is supposed to be lived) reigns in the Gay world
In your culture, what's the «common way» of living your sexuality?
Did you have a «coming out» scene with your family, friends, or at work telling them you were gay?
In my case, I didn't say the infamous line, I just told my mother (she's Cuban) I was in a relationship with a person called Alberto. She cried and cried, and when my father (he's a Spaniard) got home, he asked her what had happend.
My mother, in tears, repeatedly said: «the worst thing that could have happened».
My father looked at me, in fear, and asked me: «are you dropping out of university?»
My mother cried: «Worse! Worse! He is gay! He is gay!»
My father looked at me, relieved, and said: «If you are gay, you are gay. But you are not dropping out of university, are you?»
Thinking back to that day, with the notion of the things said in this interview, I now realise how their (not so apparent) different cultural backgrounds were behind their reactions on the matter.
My mother's family (with the exception of my grandfather up until recently) was ok with it, and I never told anything to my dad's side of the family.
In January last year, I just went to my grandmother's 80th birthday (my dad's mother) with my current boyfriend, and she said to me: «I'm so proud to see you this happy, my boy», my grandfather was excited to be able to talk to a new member of the family about how he appeared in three Hollywood movies when he was in the Army after the Spanish Civil War. They are always asking us to visit and have lunch with them.
At the office I just said one day my boyfriend was picking me up to go to the cinema and there was no need for a coming out scene or anything.
What about you? Have you experienced a contrast between the way things are culturally expected to be and your own reality?