May 30, 2016 4:58 AM GMT
Back-story... Will start by saying I'm very average-looking haha. Anyway, a few years back, through friends I met an extremely hot guy, who for whatever reason had taken a liking to me, and of course I reciprocated his flirting... until I heard from others about his boyfriend whom he's been with since high school. After one night out with mutual friends, he "couldn't get home" and "needed" to crash at my place, so - curious to see if he'll exploit the situation - I let him crash. Of course, soon enough he made a move on me, and I rebuffed him on account of his boyfriend... 4 times before he got the message and slinked off to the sofa bed.
I later found out he and his boyfriend are in an open relationship, (i'm less against it morally as I was when I first met him) not that it would have changed my distaste at being third wheel. Anyway, I don't know if it's because he's still attracted to me (I don't know how??), or he respects me for doing the "right thing" (the temptation was great), but he has since made a huge effort to befriend me, finding various reasons to reconnect, offering help at every opportunity, and just being unrealistically nice overall. He also still flirts a lot when we bump into each other at clubs, sometimes trying to kiss me in front of his boyfriend.
However, we only hang out a couple times a year, as the friendship is completely one-sided with him taking all the initiative so far, because I heard terrible things by others about how he treats his boyfriend, and my natural cynicism makes me inclined to avoid wasting time on people who may turn out to be fake. I'm surprised he hasn't gotten the hint and given up already. It's weird... his body language is as one would expect from some allegedly fake, vapid, serial cheater, but looking at it objectively, he has only been extraordinarily nice, thorough in communications, and reliable this whole time.
My increasingly nuanced view of the world is making me wonder if I had been swayed too much by gossip and assumptions, and that perhaps I should give friendship a chance.
I later found out he and his boyfriend are in an open relationship, (i'm less against it morally as I was when I first met him) not that it would have changed my distaste at being third wheel. Anyway, I don't know if it's because he's still attracted to me (I don't know how??), or he respects me for doing the "right thing" (the temptation was great), but he has since made a huge effort to befriend me, finding various reasons to reconnect, offering help at every opportunity, and just being unrealistically nice overall. He also still flirts a lot when we bump into each other at clubs, sometimes trying to kiss me in front of his boyfriend.
However, we only hang out a couple times a year, as the friendship is completely one-sided with him taking all the initiative so far, because I heard terrible things by others about how he treats his boyfriend, and my natural cynicism makes me inclined to avoid wasting time on people who may turn out to be fake. I'm surprised he hasn't gotten the hint and given up already. It's weird... his body language is as one would expect from some allegedly fake, vapid, serial cheater, but looking at it objectively, he has only been extraordinarily nice, thorough in communications, and reliable this whole time.
My increasingly nuanced view of the world is making me wonder if I had been swayed too much by gossip and assumptions, and that perhaps I should give friendship a chance.