Never Imagined It Would Happen To Me -- I Got Scammed: Warning to All Who Use Grindr etc.

  • hartfan

    Posts: 1037

    Jun 03, 2016 11:59 AM GMT
    Hi all,

    I just wanted to share a precautionary experience that just happened to me, in the hopes that it will prevent it from happening to anyone else.

    I met someone on one of these social networking apps like Grindr. The guy was reasonably good-looking and seemed nice. We had a few Skype calls including voice and even video. He had a Facebook profile that looked legit. I even googled his photos, which included a whole array of himself in different places and occasions with family and friends, but didn't get anything. He had a job in the same industry as my previous one, and he seemed to know some insider details that sounded right, and this was before we were even friends on Facebook. He lived in another country, but then he told me he was interested in coming to meet me and also do some investing in the area. He even sent me a hotel reservation and air ticket that seemed to check out when I called the hotel.

    But just after he was supposedly due to arrive, he called me about being held up at the airport because of bringing in excess currency. I then received a call from a local number claiming to be an immigration officer telling me the same thing. From then on, I was being tag teamed into ponying up cash for various fines and fees so as to allow him to be free. I guess I was desperate and lonely and had been looking forward to meeting him that I didn't question too much. But finally I was at the end of my tether and managed to track down someone at the official agency who advised me to report to the cops and relevant authorities. It finally sunk in that I had been scammed. And I'm pretty savvy about these things that I never thought it would happen to me, but for some reason in the moment my gut overruled my logic and allowed it to happen.

    I hope I serve as a precautionary tale to warn that it can really happen to anyone, and these crooks have such an elaborate operation that they can convince me enough to fork over my hard-earned savings. I just wanted to share this; if I can stop this from happening to even just one more person, it will be worth this.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 03, 2016 1:20 PM GMT
    Thanks for sharing your experience, and I hope that people learn from it.
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    Jun 03, 2016 3:47 PM GMT
    As soon as someone who i have never met in person ask for money , it is a red flag !
  • Import

    Posts: 7190

    Jun 03, 2016 4:37 PM GMT
    neffa saidAs soon as someone who i have never met in person ask for money , it is a red flag !

    Right?
    The moment someone I never met before from an online message exchange is asking me for money--- immediate red flag. Would NEVER just give money over to someone I haven't met in person regardless of their facebook profiles, etc..

    I think your lonliness got the best of you, OP. I mean, what else to say? Lesson learned..
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    Jun 03, 2016 5:17 PM GMT
    Sorry, OP! Thank you for sharing!
    There are already many stories like this, many end up with being stood up at the airport.
  • Looking9

    Posts: 31

    Jun 03, 2016 7:43 PM GMT
    Thank you for sharing......

    For all the AVAILABLE, INTERESTING men in your city who would like to get to know you, you thought some "hook up" app was the way to go.

    ..... As an available, really good catch who's single, guess what, ...........

    Hope you and other like minded men realize the danger you've put yourself in, be lucky you were not robbed, harmed or killed!
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    Jun 03, 2016 8:45 PM GMT
    Hi there,

    So I am happy that you figured out you got scammed and are now a bit less naive, but I have to break it down to you that most people know that if a complete stranger asks you for money, you say no. I have friends that i've known for years whom I wouldn't give money to, and even guy's that I have been intimate with that I wouldn't give money to. I understand that you had a rapport with him and trusted him and such, but if someone needs to ask a complete stranger they have never met in person for money before a close family or friend, the rhetoric of such implies that it is a scam/ untrustworthy person.

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    Jun 03, 2016 8:48 PM GMT
    Did you ever give him any money?
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    Jun 03, 2016 8:58 PM GMT
    I am glad that you were able to catch it.

    Also, there has been an increased of emails as well here in RJ, from scammers from: Los Angeles, the Russian Federation, Burkina Faso, Benin, Nigeria, etc., that I have been receiving claiming they are new to the RJ website and that they can not communicate in RJ, and send their personal email address. They just created their profile, profile is empty... are not verified…this is clearly a SCAM, delete these emails as well and do not communicate with these scammers.
  • badbug

    Posts: 800

    Jun 03, 2016 9:22 PM GMT

    I had a friend who came close to falling for something like this, though his involved some great deal on a motorbike. He really just wanted that bike so badly he was willing to ignore his spidey senses, my friend was also spiderman. Good on you for sharing your experience.

    It does sound pretty elaborate. Not like these Russian guys PMing on RJ lately. "i am in Russia, can't talk here, send me information" We all have a weak spot. I have been looking to adopt a dog lately, and there are quite a few scams out there.

    Your little story will remind me to keep aware.
  • Allen

    Posts: 341

    Jun 04, 2016 6:20 AM GMT
    I can't help but be curious as to how much he scammed you for?
  • buddycat

    Posts: 1874

    Jun 04, 2016 7:04 AM GMT
    Sorry to hear that happened to you. Once they asked for money you probably shouldn't have bothered. You have to be careful online. It also should have been a red flag with them being held up at the airport. Usually guys want to meet guys that are close, not across the country or globe unless they are really rich and you are extremely hot.
  • hartfan

    Posts: 1037

    Jun 04, 2016 4:12 PM GMT
    Thanks for the support, everyone. I did lose enough that it hurt. And I'm hating myself for it.

    Even thinking back, I still don't totally understand why I did what I did. It was definitely a moment of weakness, exacerbated by the sophistication and well-preparedenss of their methods. They might have even really done their research on the kind of person I am to hit me at precisely the points where I can be manipulated, who knows. I have always thought I'd be smarter than that, and now I know I'm not. That's why despite the shame of this incident, I am telling it to serve as a reminder to all, that no one is really safe even when you think you are, and I really hope it doesn't happen to any of you.
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    Jun 04, 2016 5:21 PM GMT
    Looking9 said
    Hope you and other like minded men realize the danger you've put yourself in, be lucky you were not robbed, harmed or killed!


    I think you're being rather alarmist. People just need to exercise reasonable caution, that's all. Guess what? The overwhelming majority of people who meet others via social media don't get scammed, robbed, raped or murdered.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 04, 2016 8:17 PM GMT
    Hmm. One of the good things about having serious trust issues is that I never fall for stuff like this. Sorry this happened to you though.
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    Jun 04, 2016 8:29 PM GMT
    HOW MUCH $$$???

    Just curious about the amount of this scam.
    And WHY were you being asked to give money?
    Wasn't the charge against your not-yet-met friend that he was carrying TOO MUCH CURRENCY?
    Did you wonder why any fine couldn't be taken from his own ample funds?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jun 05, 2016 5:29 PM GMT
    OP may well be the youngest person to get scammed on Grindr lol.

    How do people fall for stuff like that in any context?!?