Candlelight Vigils: Trying to understand...

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    Jun 16, 2016 6:03 AM GMT
    I see a lot on the news, and the photos are often showing people at the candlelight vigils.

    Not to debate on what I feel anyone needs to do to grieve or cope, but what is the significance of these? Is it more prominent in some religions than others? Does it offer a necessary and spiritual release of grief through tears around others?

    I personally would not and will not attend any sort of public mourning ceremony. I only feel comfortable sharing my emotions with people close to me. I also went thru 2 periods where I myself was in a situation 6 years ago just 90 miles away, where although not quite this magnitude...a friend was shot right next to me outside a gay bar in Tampa. And it was a harrowing experience because Despite being cleared as being a suspect, my friend's family and friends treated me like shit for somehow allowing this to happen and not being able to recall who it was who shot him.

    So for me, it's better to remain factual about what happened, rather than to soak myself with tears and be around others who are also grieving. It just wouldn't make me feel better about anything. I know the 7 stages of grief, but I feel the time to write letters and protest, close these firing ranges down, demand mandatory Russian style mental health asylums to keep these crazy people...is now.

    I find it hard to be sad because we've seen this over and over in the news. I lived in Colorado thru the entire movie theater trial. Now I'm in Orlando hearing the exact same thing. I'm not sad, I'm mad. America knows what it needs to do, but it Refuses to do it. Too much freedom. So I think the people deserve more than a vigil. A Million gay/bi/straight man March with the ferociousness of the Treyvon Martin protests (which, also happened in the gun-shaped state) to increase mental health asylums and shut down public firing ranges is in order.
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    Jun 16, 2016 6:18 AM GMT
    It starts in the home.
    Acceptance is born in your home, community and social settings.
    Mentally ill and/or terrorist should never fly, buy guns etc.
    Keep in mind this will NOT STOP them from trying to KILL YOU or ME!
    They will capture you , cuff you to a cage and burn you alive.
    Tie you to a chair and toss you off a tall building.
    Slit your throat in the night while having coffee with friends.
    Strap bombs around suicide attackers and blow thousands up like in the airports etc. in France/Belgium

    The solution?
    Getting with reality and restructure the family for support.
    Social condition with tolerance and acceptance.
    WE HAVE A RESPONSIBILITY to be true to our Country
    and our freedom. You act against this....you can't come here
    and live here freely!
    to be continued.....
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    Jun 16, 2016 6:52 AM GMT
    Thankyou, Thankyou.

    But this relates to candlelight vigils how?
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    Jun 16, 2016 7:20 AM GMT
    FuzzyPecs28 saidThankyou, Thankyou.

    But this relates to candlelight vigils how?


    You're not going so I just added a few words.
    I am not one for public gatherings like that either.
    Real change??
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    Jun 16, 2016 3:18 PM GMT
    My brother was easy to anger while I got sad. He'd even get angry at me getting sad. And for most of his life he'd neither relate to nor understand my sadness until he had his own child who has similar sensitivities to mine, who reacts to the world as do I, who gets sad. And now my getting sad no longer makes my brother mad.

    Both sadness and anger are protections and both sadness and anger are weapons and both sadness and anger are poisons and both sadness and anger are antidotes to each other.

    Through sadness we reach inside, we become introspective, we face ourselves and learn who we are. Through anger we strike out, we become motivated and we learn what we can do. So through them both we can grow. But both sadness and anger also can destroy us. We may luxuriate in being sad and thereby incapacitate ourselves or in our anger we might bring upon ourselves the harm from others or even to those we love by our striking out, or we may not stop to think and in striking out hurt ourselves.

    So whether within a congregation or alone, holding vigil serves that sadness, creates a space for its expression, fostering the benefits of knowing who we are.

    And protest, be that by marching together or tweeting alone serves the anger, creating a space for its expression, fostering the benefits of knowing what we can do.

    That we can know ourselves and change the world.
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    Jun 16, 2016 3:34 PM GMT
    everyone is so different.
  • Destinharbor

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    Jun 16, 2016 3:52 PM GMT
    It is nothing more than like going to a funeral. I mean, there really is no point except to honor and respect those who have died. Some people prefer to grieve privately and some find comfort in having others around who are also feeling sad or mad or lonely for the same reason. I'm not a religious person (atheist) and I don't believe in auras or afterlife out any of that but I do feel almost in a trance in a group who's mental energy feels present, palpable. But I only feel it in a group if I'm truly feeling the loss. I don't if, for example, I attend a funeral for someone I didn't know but wanted to honor or the loss of a friend's dad or similar. I have felt it in an intense church service when I was experimenting with religion. I do believe we put out energy and if a group is on the same wavelength, it is felt.
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    Jun 16, 2016 4:18 PM GMT
    A vigil is just a people getting together to memorialize an event. It could be to mourn, to pay tribute, to show support. Vigils can be religious, spiritual or completely secular. The significance is that it is a visual form of solidarity meant to be seen. Its not just for the people who attend, its also for people to know that a group gathered somewhere in honor of an event.

    People react to tragedies in different ways. So for you (and me) being around grieving people may be the last thing we want to do. But for others, they need to be around others who are grieving either as a show of solidarity or to validate what they are feeling or just to be there part of the moment. It's not much different than a memorial service except that a person doesn't have to die to have one. There have been vigils for campus rape victims for example.
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    Jun 16, 2016 5:51 PM GMT
    In a godless world full of a multiplicity of religions that people really don't follow, candlelight provides for an air of solemnity that one just doesn't get from flashlights and Zippo lighters.

    Saying that you're going to a Flashlight Vigil just doesn't have that certain je ne sais quoi.
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    Jun 16, 2016 6:54 PM GMT
    To the ancients, yes, lighting candles (and incense or sage) while chanting or channeling was-is a form of spiritual healing, it helps ground the 7 chakras during meditation. Most religions (including Satanic) have adopted some form of candle lighting during service, the unity flame. I suppose this is why candles are very popular around the Dec 25 winter equinox.

    Due to heavy religious usage in the united states, I think people just grow up with this tradition without knowing its true meaning. During a candlelight vigil, the mass of people are actually calling upon (privately chanting) the spirit realm which helps to heal pain. The more people involved in the chant, the more powerful the group will be. This is the basis of "the church fellowship" experience.

    There are many ancient secrets that the "eternal flame" holds, but it starts with ones own spiritual journey icon_idea.gif

    zen-chakra-meditation.jpg
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    Jun 16, 2016 8:59 PM GMT
    Due to real jock's sucky new interface, I don't feel like quoting everyone but all good replies. I can see the significance of a public thing to make people feel a sense of validity of their feelings too.

    Obama came to town today to join the vigils. No comment either way, I think it's respectful. But I still envision the Native Indians of Florida would have marched down to St. Lucie and burnt down the shop that sold him the gun, tied up his family, and take all the assets.

    I know that doesn't help, but things like this make my tribal side go wild.
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    Jun 16, 2016 9:03 PM GMT
    Different strokes for different folks. I personally would never attend a "vigil," but I understand that for some people vigils bring them solace.
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    Jun 17, 2016 1:13 AM GMT
    FuzzyPecs28 saidDue to real jock's sucky new interface, I don't feel like quoting everyone but all good replies. I can see the significance of a public thing to make people feel a sense of validity of their feelings too.

    Obama came to town today to join the vigils. No comment either way, I think it's respectful. But I still envision the Native Indians of Florida would have marched down to St. Lucie and burnt down the shop that sold him the gun, tied up his family, and take all the assets.

    I know that doesn't help, but things like this make my tribal side go wild.


    The Natives of Florida and all over this continent and the Africans, who were brought here, raped, sodomized, beheaded, dismembered, lynched, beaten, had their tongues pulled out slowly with rusty picks for speaking 1 word in their own native languages, demoralized, demeaned, marginalized, starved, mutilated, kidnapped and displaced from their own lands would empathize completely with all of our sorrow at this time, and whenever these things happen. They were the victims of the original American terrorism. Guns and the murder of Millions of innocents were the foundation that formed these nations we now call The Americas...and here we are centuries later with the same horrible confusion interwoven in our very fabric. Jews, victims of murderous terrorism in Europe. "Aborigines," the victims of horrible murderous terrorism because of the brown color of their skin in "Australia," when they were there thousands of years before others. Indians in India were victims or murderous terrorism and savage slavery under British colonization, to the extent that many of them now can not stand their own precious dark brown skin. And LGBTQI Folks of EVERY skin color have been victims of savage murderous, terroristic brutality in the Americas and all over the world. The common denominator...Men. That fuckin' Y chromosome fellas. Not that women have not been involved, certainly they have. But men have been at the helm of every act of terrorism throughout the ages. We have to come together my Brothas - Black, Red, Brown, White, Yellow. That is the only way to make the world better and safer. The need to grieve by candle light, music, public ceremonies, solitude, it's all ok, it's all valid, and it's all important. Choose your way and be comforted in your choice, I'll choose mine. When we accept and embrace, not "tolerate" (tolerance = bullshit word meaning the allowance of continued covert racism- you be you...over there!) ...when we embrace each other's differences, share our uniqueness and commonalities, we'll be safer, we'll be happier, we'll be better. Love you guys! Peace :-)