Who else is a "pure bottom?"

  • Spooked

    Posts: 3

    Jun 28, 2016 11:50 AM GMT
    I honestly hate topping, I did it once with my partner and I'll never do it again. It's awful, and I'm really bad at it.

    Anyone else a pure bottom?!
  • Mile

    Posts: 12

    Jun 29, 2016 4:01 AM GMT
    Spooked saidI honestly hate topping, I did it once with my partner and I'll never do it again. It's awful, and I'm really bad at it.

    Anyone else a pure bottom?!

    Dude, i have an important question to you. How much do you like when your partner does a blowjob for you? Can he get you off by doing it? If u like blowjob then the only reason why it can be unpleasant to top is too tight hole. Are you only bottom not because it brings you fantastic sensations but because topping brings the awkward ones? What about me, i don't consider myself a pure bottom, but have only bottomed (a couple of times) and had no physical pleasure. It was different for you from the very beginning? Why you don't hate bottoming? It requires preparation, takes time and can hurt. What your partner felt when you tried to top him? Wasn't he angry coz of preparing to have sex having got used to have easy (with no preparation) sex as a top?
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    Jul 03, 2016 9:35 AM GMT
    Spooked saidI honestly hate topping, I did it once with my partner and I'll never do it again. It's awful, and I'm really bad at it.

    Anyone else a pure bottom?!

    I am a pure bottom and I do get great satisfaction in the role of being a bottom,I have played the role of a top and it is hard work and exhausting,I have an average size cut cock and I often feel I am not satisfying my partner in the top role,I have use all sorts of positions,fast and slow and even hardcore actions,you know , nothing seems to give me that satisfaction I love being a bottom and want to please my top with a memorable fuck by being so experienced.
  • Mile

    Posts: 12

    Jul 08, 2016 12:39 PM GMT
    Sexedupjordan saidI often feel I am not satisfying my partner in the top role.

    I love being a bottom and want to please my top with a memorable fuck by being so experienced.

    Why pleasing your partner is more important for you than being physically satisfied by sex? Why, when you are topping, your partner isn't pleasing you and doesn't gets satisfied just from understanding that he gives pleasure?

    According to your logic, the bottom should be satisfied by pleasing his top. And the top is satisfied by being pleased. Am i right? So, there are much more tops and vers-tops than bottoms and vers-bottoms, because people mostly want to get off, it's a thing of paramount importance, not to please anybody else and be used.

    And you are not a pure bottom if you like the physical sensations while is topping somebody. You bottom only just because you want to be a pleaser, don't you?

    Bottom seems to be an inferior role.
  • rrazvy

    Posts: 69

    Jul 24, 2016 7:32 PM GMT
    I have never topped, I've never penetrated anything. I don't really have the desire to do it. I'm not a thrusting kind of boy.

    That said, I won't pretend bottoming is always easy. It depends on a man's cock size, and also, to be frank, where you are in your 'cycle' -- how 'full' you feel, basically. The emptier the better. And even once he's in you, it's still a case of getting a good rhythm and finding the right position.

    I find it much much easier if I'm seeing someone regularly, and only them. Then their cock fits like a glove and he can take me as and when he likes, basically icon_smile.gif.
  • frombottom

    Posts: 7

    Aug 02, 2016 2:43 AM GMT
    Never topped. Even when I planned with a versatile guy to flip flop jut did not happened and we did not miss it.
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    Aug 02, 2016 3:34 AM GMT
    I think bottoms are confused and haven't learned how to be men yet and tops are pervs

    sry thas just how I feel

    there's a psychological aspect of topping and u grew up in a society where u were taught that men are strong and powerful and u prolly haven't learned how to view men in such a way that would allow u to get off to the idea of fucking their ass

    u most likely only jack off to dicks and your fantasy is prolly about being a bitch bcus that's what u are when u get fucked again thas jus my opinion tho

    the obvious solution I would come to is that you must relearn what it means to be dominant and be a male force in nature right now your energetically putting out the aura of getting fucked

    I only mean to say this so that u can come to enjoy ur sexual organ that God has given u because he didn't create u to just get fucked

    you should try to allow yourself to focus on a different part of the male body erotically in your case I would recommend the ass

    I've met a lot of boys who have told me they only bottom or that they have never even topped

    That would mean they have a virgin dick and a fucked ass and I don't know how anyone could walk around in that

    as a top it turns me on when a boy tells me he only gets fucked.
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    Aug 02, 2016 3:48 AM GMT
    @Spooked, thank you for starting an interesting topic.
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    Aug 02, 2016 4:11 AM GMT
    Spooked said I'm really bad at it


    also don't let a sour hookup experience with one person shape u ur bound to have a different experience with whomever ur with each time it's a new story a new experience
  • takashi

    Posts: 192

    Aug 02, 2016 4:41 AM GMT
    Hey Ekho,
    Are you versatile or are you just a top?
    Have you ever been the bottom? How often have you been a bottom?

    If you are just a top and never or very rarely bottom, then you are not being fair to bottoms.
    Without bottoms there can be no sex. Imagine a world with only tops! We would all start having sex with women.
    If we were all manly men, with long beautiful cocks like yours, then there may be NO gay sex all together.

    Some men are just wired differently.
    We not only accept our roles, but we do receive great pleasure from it.
    It may be hard to understand if that is not what you are.

    You are still young, live twenty more years and you may have different thoughts
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    Aug 02, 2016 5:49 AM GMT
    takashi said

    If you are just a top and never or very rarely bottom, then you are not being fair to bottoms..



    I don't mean to sound unfair I only meant to share my stance and point of view. I felt like it might not be received well but everything happens for a reason mayb it will be of some use to someone.

    i understand people are happy to be a pure bottom and I respect that I only meant to provide a viewpoint maybe that could be considered at a later point in their life. You know we all live multiple lives in our one single life here on earth and people are bound to be radically different people sexually emotionally physically and energetically at different ages and will often seek to explore different paths and alternative routes that may be surprising given their current state that is of course subject to change because change is the only constant in life as is said
  • rrazvy

    Posts: 69

    Aug 02, 2016 9:03 AM GMT
    Ekho saidI think bottoms are confused and haven't learned how to be men yet and tops are pervs

    sry thas just how I feel

    there's a psychological aspect of topping and u grew up in a society where u were taught that men are strong and powerful and u prolly haven't learned how to view men in such a way that would allow u to get off to the idea of fucking their ass

    u most likely only jack off to dicks and your fantasy is prolly about being a bitch bcus that's what u are when u get fucked again thas jus my opinion tho

    the obvious solution I would come to is that you must relearn what it means to be dominant and be a male force in nature right now your energetically putting out the aura of getting fucked

    I only mean to say this so that u can come to enjoy ur sexual organ that God has given u because he didn't create u to just get fucked

    you should try to allow yourself to focus on a different part of the male body erotically in your case I would recommend the ass

    I've met a lot of boys who have told me they only bottom or that they have never even topped

    That would mean they have a virgin dick and a fucked ass and I don't know how anyone could walk around in that

    as a top it turns me on when a boy tells me he only gets fucked.


    I don't understand to whom you're talking here:to muscle jock bottoms, or the twinks / boys as well? What's wrong with having an aura of someone who only gets fucked by men?

    I think these things are deeply psychological. I guess the majority of gay men fall somewhere in the middle of the top-bottom continuum, with a good smattering of 'mostly top' and 'mostly bottom'. But there are those who from their mother's arms practically were bent one way or the other, and when this happens, such people usually go for their opposites, in body shape as well as psychology and personality. There is a wonderful Tumblr blog, http://hastohappenthisway.tumblr.com (NSFW 18+), which explores this dynamic extremely well. (I wonder, incidentally, whether the Centurion had this kind of relationship with his 'boy' -- both males reaching to the fullness of their underlying blueprints.) Not to say that we don't grow and develop, but we grow and develop within certain foundations.
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4435

    Aug 02, 2016 3:05 PM GMT
    I'm vers but have been in relationships lasting a year or two where I was "pure bottom." I assume you're not excluding mutual blowjobs. I have also been in relationships where I was 95% pure top (I find most bottom guys want to give it a shot every now and then). There's something in the chemistry between two men that seems to have this effect on me and it isn't physical size or age or perceived masculinity or even personality dominance because usually when I've been the bottom guy, people meeting us assumed the opposite. Just a chemical thing. And I seldom have a desire to flip once the pattern is established. One thing I know for sure, sexual needs of most guys are pretty hard-wired by the time they get to about age 25 and there's little logic or reason to it-- it just is, and the more open you are to your partner's quirks and kinks, the better your chance of being a true couple. I can respect just about any guy's chosen preferences and see no superiority in one vs another nor do I think it bleeds over to other areas in the relationship in terms of perceived masculinity. And to guys that can't understand that, you've seriously reduced your likelihood of finding a compatible partner because it means you don't understand and respect him.
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    Aug 02, 2016 11:13 PM GMT
    The vast majority of guys I come across are all are very close to 100% bottoms. And I don't really get why to be honest. I'm versatile because it both feels good but I usually end up topping because most guys I encounter are default bottoms. Which is fine for flings but I definitely wouldn't be interested in dating a guy that never wanted to top.
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    Aug 02, 2016 11:42 PM GMT
    Never topped and never had to. I must be blessed since most guys I attract are tops.

    My tops treat me as their equal and are very tender to me. I don't get off with over-domineering tops.

    In fact, up until the time of penetration, you would probably think I'm the top. I'm the big spoon, I love to kiss a guy's neck, grab him from behind, I like taking the initiative... I remember a 5'7 guy trying to spoon me... which would never work, but he tried regardless... then I asked him what all that effort was for, he said "that's what a top's supposed to do" ...so cute!
  • boyy44

    Posts: 14

    Aug 21, 2016 9:58 AM GMT
    I only bottomed, never topped another man, only women (some time ago)
  • jayatl56

    Posts: 463

    Aug 21, 2016 12:33 PM GMT
    Me too. only ever bottomed and think I'm good at it. My BF of 3 years wants me to top him from time to time. Problem is, he's as tight as a crab's ass, and that's water tight! I have to go so s-l-o-w that by the time anything begins, I'm limp. I pull out, jack a minute and start over. And I just don't feel the part. I feel spastic - can't get the rhythm but I'm willing to work on it.

    The other option would be to find someone we'd mutually like to join us every once in a while to fuck him. So far, BF isn't into that idea.
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    Aug 21, 2016 3:29 PM GMT
    To have prolonged satisfying sexual relationship, there has to be some inequality between the two partners. When both share equal power dynamic, the sexual activities tend toward boredom very quickly and cannot be recovered. This phenomenon has been studied in straight relationships and their sexual satisfaction has dropped precipitously since woman becomes more equal in the household with the man. (I support women's equal rights.) Gay relationships typically involve some inequality and as a result they have much more satisfying sex.
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4435

    Aug 21, 2016 4:06 PM GMT
    woodsmen saidTo have prolonged satisfying sexual relationship, there has to be some inequality between the two partners. When both share equal power dynamic, the sexual activities tend toward boredom very quickly and cannot be recovered. This phenomenon has been studied in straight relationships and their sexual satisfaction has dropped precipitously since woman becomes more equal in the household with the man. (I support women's equal rights.) Gay relationships typically involve some inequality and as a result they have much more satisfying sex.

    Inequality in what sense?
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    Aug 21, 2016 5:01 PM GMT
    One type of inequality that was researched is income inequality for example.

    NYT: In 1977, two-thirds of Americans believed that the ideal family arrangement was for the husband to earn the money and the wife to stay home. By 2012, less than one-third still held this belief, according to a paper coming out this week by the Council on Contemporary Families.

    Husbands have doubled the time they spend doing housework. One frequently cited study suggested that couples who shared housework equally had sex less frequently than couples who followed a more conventional division of labor. But a forthcoming study of more recent marriages finds that egalitarian couples report no difference in sexual frequency or satisfaction compared to couples who cling to traditional roles — the exception being the about 5 percent of marriages in which the husband performs most of the housework.

    http://www.nytimes.com/2014/07/27/opinion/sunday/the-new-instability.html?