No social media?

  • ChicagoSteve

    Posts: 1272

    Jul 07, 2016 12:07 AM GMT
    Do any of you guys wish that we could go back and just not have social media or this whole instant connection online? I realize if we did, I would not be able to write this message right now, but I'm old enough to remember when we did not have the internet and social media, and in a lot of ways it was better. What do you guys think? I'd be interested in getting some younger perspectives because you guys basically grew up with this. I guess what I'm saying is, do you see it as an advantage or a curse?
  • interesting

    Posts: 565

    Jul 07, 2016 2:46 AM GMT
    For me advantage: instant online connection let you look up anything you want and any question you may need most likely would be answered. But I do see the disadvantage to this, personally for me, the internet allowed me to pull into my shell more. I'm already so shy and socially awkward, it only helped me to become more so, and it doesn't allow you to experience the many wonderful moments with other people.

    On the other side though, I grew up in a place where my face wasn't in front of some sort of screen all the time, so when the whole instant online came along, it really drew me into it.
  • Dynamo_spark

    Posts: 224

    Jul 09, 2016 5:26 AM GMT
    It is a curse, people Gay or Straight have become sort of judgemental or picky on Chat-Sites. Sort of like being at a meat market. 'Don't like that steak, not juicy enough' or, 'Don't like the way that mince is packaged'. I remember in the older days, you could walk into a club or bar and mingle and make a friend or two and, it was safe. Now people hook-up on Social Media and they form 'Chat' groups, they then meet at clubs or bars to see if they can connect. It is so radicle, walking into a bar these days, you see groups of people hanging out and then you see lonely guys just hanging about, hoping for conversation.
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    Jul 09, 2016 6:15 AM GMT
    Online interactions make it easier for people to be assholes to others. It's kind of a good thing. Makes it easier to avoid toxic people.
  • nice_chap

    Posts: 274

    Jul 09, 2016 10:44 AM GMT
    I would probably still be at my computer a lot of the time, but I would spend more of it doing constructive things, like digital art projects and movie editing, maybe some writing. Social media is more of a distraction to me.
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    Jul 12, 2016 1:28 PM GMT
    My view is that the social media is not the culprit. The real culprit are the people who use it to such a degree that their lives practically revolve around Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, etc.-- in some cases to the exclusion of other things. Social media is good, but not when you let it control your life.
  • Apparition

    Posts: 3515

    Jul 13, 2016 1:18 AM GMT
    none of my friends live within a thousand miles of me. so no to OP.

    I got so used to it after university that I forget what real life is like sometimes. I really dont distinguish between the two.

    I first realized when I had this conversation one day:

    (note: "Mike went to my university and this was a year or two after graduation. he lived down the street. I talked to him and other friends on whatever was chat every day.) "
    -------------
    Me: new movie out, want to go see it?
    mike: ya, at 7
    Me: should I meet you there or come here first?
    Mike: I moved to trinidad 6 weeks ago
    Me: crap.
  • ChicagoSteve

    Posts: 1272

    Jul 14, 2016 3:48 PM GMT
    Apparition saidnone of my friends live within a thousand miles of me. so no to OP.

    I got so used to it after university that I forget what real life is like sometimes. I really dont distinguish between the two.

    I first realized when I had this conversation one day:

    (note: "Mike went to my university and this was a year or two after graduation. he lived down the street. I talked to him and other friends on whatever was chat every day.) "
    -------------
    Me: new movie out, want to go see it?
    mike: ya, at 7
    Me: should I meet you there or come here first?
    Mike: I moved to trinidad 6 weeks ago
    Me: crap.


    But couldn't you have this conversation with a phone call?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 02, 2016 4:40 AM GMT
    Social media facilitate people to a virtual space (i.e., this forum) dedicated to a certain cause or belief system. My life is enriched with social media access. It allows me to scan across a wide span of population of people including those who come from a different cultural background and level of education than I do to read their opinions on issues I find interesting. But it is not better than face-to-face interaction. A few weeks ago, I met up with a visiting professor from a prestigious university in the NE US. She spent over an hour talking to me about her hypotheses about certain unbecoming behaviors seen in people and what she is researching on as possible causes for these antisocial behaviors. In face-to-face discussion like that, I could ask questions when I didn't understand any aspect of the experimental design and got detailed responses. I have never gotten detailed discussions that are so engrossed like this in social media. But social media is still a boon to me because it allows me to be aware of information "outside the box."

    Social media such as this forum allows people of diverse background and education levels to post their unbridled opinions which can sometimes shock or titillate a reader like me . Back in my university course on Gay Studies that I took, all my fellow classmates were restrained in what they felt they could and should share in class because we were face to face with each other and the professor and the guest speakers. A big contrast is seen here in these online forums.
  • Joshthegaymer

    Posts: 83

    Aug 02, 2016 7:00 AM GMT
    ChicagoSteve saidDo any of you guys wish that we could go back and just not have social media or this whole instant connection online? I realize if we did, I would not be able to write this message right now, but I'm old enough to remember when we did not have the internet and social media, and in a lot of ways it was better. What do you guys think? I'd be interested in getting some younger perspectives because you guys basically grew up with this. I guess what I'm saying is, do you see it as an advantage or a curse?


    Being that I was born close to the end of the 20th century and grew up in the 21st century, I am more familiar with digital communication. All of my past relationships with guys have been online long distance relationships. Most of the guys I dated treated me poorly and tried to objectify me; whenever I told them to stop, they would cause drama with me until I was forced to break up with them because I was not going to settle for any less. The only guy who I've dated ho treated me with love and respect made me very happy for once in my life. Unfortunately, he and I were forced to break up when his mom got a job promotion that forced him to move from Texas to a remote part of Alaska with very limited internet access. After that, I was a mess. I barely went outside, I barely talked to anyone, I was an emotional wreck, and I am still trying to figure out how to let go of the past and move on with my life. Ever since then, I have been told by some guys that I'll be "lucky if I ever find true love again." I even had a guy that I met on another website tell me that he would never date a Jewish guy because apparently my Jewish brethren "are all the cause of the world's ills." That has only made my already low self-esteem and self-worth drop even more. Sometimes I even cry myself to sleep because I don't feel worthy of another person's love to be honest. Nowadays whenever I try to find love, I am almost forced to either have to look a certain way or be willing to either give out sex willy nilly or send sexually explicit pictures to perverted guys or even get naked on Skype just so that they can use me and in a way violate me. To be honest, it's been more of a curse than a blessing for me because I don't see many gay guys actually value the importance of chastity until after marriage.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 02, 2016 9:47 AM GMT
    Social media takes away the tyranny of the local scene.