Lasting too long? Such a thing?

  • L0nglastr26

    Posts: 2

    Jul 27, 2016 4:17 PM GMT
    Ok, so here is my problem...
    I'm a 26yo gay male, am vers and when it comes to me topping another guy, I last ways too long, I mean I last for over 2-3 hrs before I blow a load. Does anyone else have a similar problem like mine as I'm confused as hell as to what's going on.
    It's been happening since I became sexually active at 15 and I've even gone to get tests done at the age of 18 and 24 to see if there was a problem with my testosterone and prostrate but everything came back perfectly fine for my age group.
    This issue has caused many problems with relationships and f-buddies because they can never get me to get off and I eventually exhaust them before I am anywhere near close to cumming. I have tried to keep myself interested in sex with introducing toys, changing up positions and much longer foreplay. When I masturbate, even that takes a fair amount of time in excess of 45 mins...If it helps, I am circumcised, 7inch, rarely watch porn and masturbate once or twice a week, am fairly fit and am not on any medications or nutritional supplements.
    Some people that reply might say it's a mental/psychological thing that's preventing me from being able to get off but I really don't think it is, as it only happens when I'm giving and not taking...

    Any advice would be great thanks.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 27, 2016 4:47 PM GMT
    Hey mate ,
    Do you have the same problem when getting oral from someone ?
    As you know , the sensitive part of the penis is the head , more precisely right underneath the gland . All the sensitive nerves are located on this area , and connected to your brain .
    You might have a sensitivity issue , if it was me , i would consult an urologist ...
  • Destinharbor

    Posts: 4435

    Jul 27, 2016 5:23 PM GMT
    I was with a guy when I was a total bottom in the relationship that had that same issue. Both cumming anally as a top and masterbating, though not quite as long as you describe. Didn't bother me a bit because it meant we had long, creative sex. But I can understand your concern. Can you top a guy and pull out and masterbate fairly quickly? That's very common and not anything to worry about. It doesn't sound like you're freaking out about it and you shouldn't. Try talking to a urologist. If you or he think it is mental, ask him for a small supply of anti-anxiety pills and see what happens. I've never had any of them so I'm not an expert but some can interfere with sex drive so discuss it with him.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 27, 2016 6:10 PM GMT
    I always felt that bottoming was much more intense than topping. Maybe try retraining your brain to forget about how much better it is by not doing it for a long time (i.e., months, and no dildoing your boy hole either) and just focus on pleasuring your dick.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 27, 2016 8:27 PM GMT
    if you elect to go further with more clinical work investigate a prospective new healthcare provider with care. Find a doctor very familiar with your situation.
    Do some research on your own too.

  • ANTiSociaLiNJ...

    Posts: 1171

    Jul 27, 2016 8:43 PM GMT
    Hym, I always thought my ability to last three hours as a top made me a long lasting stallion in the bedroom. icon_cool.gif

    If you're wearing your bottoms out maybe you need several to do at the same time. You could line 'em up, so to speak.

    Boink boink boink..! Next... icon_lol.gif

    287b2c9f5ba2182f93ebedbabf3551c1.jpg
  • L0nglastr26

    Posts: 2

    Jul 29, 2016 3:26 PM GMT
    Thanks for your replies guys. @neffa: yeah I have the same problem, I've noticed that when getting oral I lose a lot of sensitivity and have had to tell them to stop because it's doing nothing. I e gone and seen my go and they have referred me onto a urologist for further investigation.
    @destinharbor: if I top a guy and then pull out to jack off, I lose the climax and it feels like I need to start all over again. As for the pills, I've been on them before and it killed my sex drive completely, I'll chat with the uro, when I see them for my appt.
    @lumpyoatmeal: before last week it had been 7months since I had any sexual activity including using toys and jacking off, I thought that may have worked and tried that before I posted this thread, thanks for the idea tho.
    @pellaz: yeah I've going to one that hopefully can help.
    @ANTIsocial: hahaha I wish I could line them up like the pic you posted but that's just not me...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 29, 2016 11:45 PM GMT
    >OP
    Have you always had this problem - like 45 minutes to cum when first jacking off as a teenager?

    Did you have wet dreams as a kid ("look ma, no hands")?

    You said you were vers, but you did not describe how or if you orgasm when getting fucked.

    Have you tried using a vibrator (more intense stimulation)?

    If there is nothing physically wrong with you, you might consider getting referred to a sex therapist. Maybe it has something to do with your ability mentally to let go and experience sex.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 30, 2016 5:24 AM GMT


    Do you have trouble or issues with any urination? Bladder control? Do you pee before sex play?

    There is a medical term..........


    Delayed ejaculation
    http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/delayed-ejaculation/basics/definition/con-20034981


    Delayed ejaculation — sometimes called impaired ejaculation — is a condition in which it takes an extended period of sexual stimulation for a man to reach sexual climax and release semen from the penis (ejaculate). Some men with delayed ejaculation are unable to ejaculate at all.

    Delayed ejaculation can be temporary or a lifelong problem. Possible causes of delayed ejaculation include certain chronic health conditions, surgeries and medications. Treatment for delayed ejaculation depends on the underlying cause.

    It's normal for men to have delayed ejaculation from time to time. Delayed ejaculation is only a problem if it's ongoing or causes stress for you or your partner.

    Some men with delayed ejaculation need 30 minutes or more of sexual stimulation to have an orgasm and ejaculate. Or, they may not be able to ejaculate at all (anejaculation).

    But, there's no specific time that indicates a diagnosis of delayed ejaculation. Instead, a man is probably experiencing delayed ejaculation if the delay is causing him distress or frustration, or if he has to stop sexual activity due to fatigue, physical irritation, loss of erection or a request from his partner.


    Often, a man might have difficulty reaching orgasm during sexual intercourse or other sexual activities with a partner. Some men can ejaculate only when masturbating.

    Delayed orgasm is divided into the following types based on symptoms:
    •Lifelong vs. acquired. With lifelong delayed ejaculation, the problem is present from the time a male reaches sexual maturity. Acquired delayed ejaculation occurs after a period of normal sexual functioning.
    •Generalized vs. situational. Generalized delayed ejaculation isn't limited to certain sex partners or certain kinds of stimulation. Situational delayed ejaculation occurs only under certain circumstances.

    Delayed ejaculation can result from certain chronic health conditions, surgeries and medications. Or it may be caused by substance abuse or a mental health concern, such as depression, anxiety or stress. In many cases, delayed ejaculation is due to a combination of physical and psychological concerns.


    Physical causes of delayed ejaculation include:
    •Certain birth defects affecting the male reproductive system
    •Injury to the pelvic nerves that control orgasm
    •Certain infections, such as a urinary tract infection
    •Prostate surgery, such as transurethral resection of the prostate (TURP) or prostate removal
    •Neurological diseases, such as diabetic neuropathy, stroke or nerve damage to the spinal cord
    •Hormone-related conditions, such as low thyroid hormone (hypothyroidism) or low testosterone (hypogonadism)
    •Retrograde ejaculation, a condition in which the semen goes backward into the bladder rather than out of the penis

    Psychological causes of delayed ejaculation include:
    •Depression, anxiety or other mental health conditions
    •Relationship problems due to stress, poor communication or other concerns
    •Anxiety about performance
    •Poor body image
    •Cultural or religious taboos
    •Differences between the reality of sex with a partner and sexual fantasies

    Medications and other substances that can cause delayed ejaculation include:
    •Some antidepressants
    •Certain high blood pressure medications
    •Certain diuretics
    •Some antipsychotic medications
    •Some anti-seizure medications
    •Alcohol — particularly drinking too much (alcohol abuse or alcoholism)

    For some men, a minor physical problem that causes a delay in ejaculation may cause anxiety about ejaculating during a sexual encounter. The resulting anxiety may worsen delayed ejaculation.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 30, 2016 5:31 AM GMT

    Start kegel exercises and learn control icon_idea.gif

  • Fireworkz

    Posts: 606

    Jul 30, 2016 6:14 AM GMT
    Do you feel that you have to cum during sex?
    Some guys don't cum or it takes forever.
    If it's not an issue for you then there's no problem.
    I think partners feel guilty that they cum and you don't. Or believe you're not satisfied with them.


    If you don't have an issue with it then explain that so they don't feel bad about it.
    As long as you are enjoying sex then it's fine. if you are not deriving pleasure from sex that's a different issue.

    I don't see a problem with a 3 hour session. Sounds like a good thing once a week.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 30, 2016 9:07 PM GMT
    Buy a fleshlight with a suction cup and practice at home. It feels the SAME as sex. You just fuck the thing, you thrust until you make it creampie.

    make sure u think about how the other guy is a bitch while you do it. once you fixed this problem ONE time, it will never come back again.

    YOU ALSO must make sure your fantasy is matched with the reality.
    Only jack off to ass, think about how you are using the other guy as a bitch, and practice! Then you will fix this problem. Then you will be happy, then you will feel like who you are inside

  • ANTiSociaLiNJ...

    Posts: 1171

    Jul 31, 2016 4:11 AM GMT
    ELNathB said
    Start kegel exercises and learn control icon_idea.gif



    Weightlifting for your penis!
  • stravagl

    Posts: 7

    Aug 06, 2016 3:37 PM GMT
    Where have u been all my life
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 06, 2016 3:42 PM GMT
    Sometimes the more we think about a perceived problem the more we exacerbate it. Perhaps you're putting too much pressure on yourself to come quickly Just relax during sex and let orgasm come organically.