When you go from hate to love

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 29, 2016 2:30 AM GMT
    Sometimes the life have rare things and situations, inexplicable flukes that make you same many questions and you shudder and you hardly recognize but it pass, as when you meet to someone and you do not start well nothing well, and in the relation have many problems, and many differences but the time, the comunication and the circumstances change all and you end for discover that you have more in common matters with who you thought detest.

    Last time to me passed with a new friend in other gay forum app; he critized much my posts and didn't like my pictures, he was very sarcastic with me and I have to accept that I disliked and his publications it bothers me much because I believed he was arrogant. After a mail discussion I proposed him turn down the agressive tone and he agreed, then lately we have gone chatting, and share pictures and experiences and we have started a great friendship and even if I am not in love of him and I imagine he not to me, he is seeming me attractive and with some special because I have know about his life and thoughts and it is wonderful. The unconfortable is that we said before many bad words and first I feel bad for think in have offended him and second, I am feel a great admiration and it make feel me bad.

    Do you have hate to someone and you have end in friendship or in relationship?

    What do you think?
  • bro4bro

    Posts: 2176

    Jul 29, 2016 4:03 PM GMT
    Sometimes when you're attracted to someone, your initial reaction is to hate him. It's a defense mechanism. You think he will reject you, or maybe you're just uncomfortable having those feelings about him, so you hate him. You may not even realize that you're actually attracted to him. This is a sign of immaturity. It's a very common emotional response.

    I was in this situation once, with a college roommate. At the time I hadn't even begun to understand my feelings about guys so I suppressed my attraction to him, and I didn't pick up on all the obvious signs that he was attracted to me (and suppressing his feelings too). We hated each other's guts. After one semester we each found another roommate and moved out. It took me years to realize what was really going on - we were so hot for each other it was driving us crazy.

    When two people hate each other passionately for no apparent reason, it's a sure sign that something else is going on. The fact that neither of us realized this, and so did nothing about it, is one of the biggest regrets of my life. My God, he was a gorgeous guy!

    So, you guys started out hating each other but now you're getting along. That's cool. Yes you said some things you now regret, but so did he, I'm sure. So, be a man and apologize. Tell him you're sorry you said those things, and you really like him. If you want, you can even tell him the reason why you hated him - because you were attracted to him but you thought he'd reject you. Can't hurt.