I see what you mean there. Being a minority can be difficult because legal rights can only go so far. There is a gaze that lingers on us that we feel the weight of. Look at gays for example; at pride parade in their full fabulousness and there are gays who are constantly making excuses in front of their straight peers, out of embarrassment that pride does not represent them because they fear judgement and the humiliation of rejection. They have this need to justify, cleanse it with description that gays are just like straights, the whole straight acting phenomenon. This is what being on the margin can do to a person. It can make us hate a part of ourselves. This is true of being a racial minority too.