You Know You're A Gay Man If..

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 10, 2007 1:42 AM GMT
    You Know You're A Gay Man If..
    - You understand the immense importance of good (or bad) lighting.
    - You can tell a woman you love her bathing suit and really mean her bathing suit.
    - You understand why the good Lord created Spandex.
    - You understand why the good Lord did not intend everyone to wear Spandex.
    - You know how to get back at just about everyone.
    - Your pets always have great names.
    - You can tell your sexual compatibility with a potential partner by the way he holds his drink.
    - You can smile to let someone know you can't stand them.
    - You've read the book, seen the movie. done the musical.
    - You know how to "air kiss."
    - You know that being called a "big slut" isn't necessarily an insult.
    - Sales clerks don't mess with you.
    - You never hold a grudge for longer than a decade.
    - You choose the most fabulous greeting cards.
    - You have the latest International Male catalogue.
    - You wouldn't dream of dressing out of the latest International Male catalogue.
    - You can be bitchy without anyone blaming it on biology.
    - You know who Barbra, Bette and Liza are.
    - You know the correct way to spell Barbra. Bette and Liza.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Oct 10, 2007 1:51 AM GMT
    -You set the standard for grooming and dressing
    -Your house ranks as one of the better cared for homes in the neighborhood
    -Its either Polo, Abracrombie & Fitch or another designer
    -Don't have a clue when it comes to financial planning
    -Wouldn't be caught dead home on New Years Eve


    Now I don't necessarily agree with everything said here, but for some.. yeah
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 10, 2007 5:30 AM GMT
    ew polo and abercrombie? Puh-leez!
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    Oct 10, 2007 7:12 AM GMT
    -You can rip the office jerk a new one with a smile on your face... and make him think its a compliment

    -You understand why the existance of an International Air Guitar Championship is a sure sign the planet has gone to hell

    - Laura Fabian's song "I Will Love Again" is still your anthem

    -"We Are Family" gives you warm fuzzies

    -You can tell your client her hair won't do that because its just too damned fried... and not get slapped

    -You understand that anyone can be a ho... and that being a slut takes real class

    -You are forever being asked by straight women for advice on pleasing men in bed

    -You are constantly mistaken for Dear Abby

    -You understand why the good Lord created hair color

    -You understand the importance of not letting the miracle of hair color go to waste

    -Your motto is "The body is a temple... now decorate!"

    -You can spot hair extensions, face lifts and fake boobs a mile away
  • Cyclops

    Posts: 1

    Oct 10, 2007 7:56 AM GMT
    Buy more maxi CD's than a record label put out.

    Have no reason for not getting the new PT Cruiser or a scooter.

    You can have naked pictures of men you don't know in your home.

    Thinks George Clooney is coming out soon !!!

    Have a boyfriend, a partner, a f**k buddy all in one week.

    Makes picking out flowers or plants for your home a main errand for the day.

    You have actually lived out some of your fantasies and still have room to re-create more.

    Know the words to a song after the 2nd time listening to it.

    Got more than one line of "You Know You're a Gay Man If" jokes.
  • Salubrious

    Posts: 420

    Oct 10, 2007 9:29 AM GMT
    Whenever someone is talking about you, they preface your name with "my gay friend".
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 10, 2007 3:24 PM GMT
    -You know that Kenneth Cole, Geoffrey Beene and Alexander Julian aren't the new guys at work
    -Your gym outfits are always color coordinated
    -Your living room not only smells great, but the aroma is seasonally appropriate(spring-fresh flowers, autumn-apple cider, etc.)
    -You also have a comforter set for every season
    -You saw the advent of plum colored furniture
    -You have your own recipes for Thai satay sauce, creme brulee and fritatas
    -You know that tiramisu isn't a city in Italy; gazpacho isn't a city in Mexico; borgonoff isn't a city in Russia
    -Your drink at Starbucks requires more than three ingredients
    -You think that corduroy is evil and must be destroyed
    -Your shirts aren't tight, they are sprayed on
    -Sweater vests can only be worn under a jacket that is not to be removed
    -Your wall hangings are art, not family pictures
    -You bought your car for the color
    -Everyone at work knows they can rely on you but to never cross you
    -You could eat off your bathroom floor...but you wouldn't for a million dollars!
  • DiverScience

    Posts: 1426

    Oct 10, 2007 3:28 PM GMT
    ::blinks::

    I don't think I'm gay anymore.



    What the heck is an "air kiss?"

    And please god don't eat off my bathroom floor.

    Get near my hair with haircolor or product and I'll likely beat you.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 10, 2007 3:29 PM GMT
    Where do I turn in my membership card?
  • Nudista

    Posts: 158

    Oct 10, 2007 3:58 PM GMT
    OMG....maybe my old man was right when he told me i was just confused!!!icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 10, 2007 7:09 PM GMT
    Guys, you can pretend you don't get any of these things, but that won't make us think that you are more masculine than us.icon_wink.gif
  • DiverScience

    Posts: 1426

    Oct 10, 2007 8:36 PM GMT
    I still wanna know what an air kiss is!
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    Oct 10, 2007 8:59 PM GMT
    Hmm... maybe it has something to do with Jimi Hendrix???
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    Oct 10, 2007 9:01 PM GMT
    I thought it was a greeting of sorts, like the double cheek kiss or something like that. Like, "I'd kiss you but my lip gloss will smear..." I dunno...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 10, 2007 9:01 PM GMT
    I thought it was a greeting of sorts, like the double cheek kiss or something like that. Like, "I'd kiss you but my lip gloss will smear..." I dunno...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 10, 2007 9:02 PM GMT
    woah, that's weird...there are 2 of me
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 10, 2007 9:05 PM GMT
    DiverScience
    ::blinks::

    I don't think I'm gay anymore.


    LMAO......ME NEITHER!icon_lol.gif