So Disappointed

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2009 12:04 AM GMT
    So, I've been seeing this guy for about a month now and we've been on maybe half a dozen dates and each time It's been really great. We have alot in common,find each other attractive, ect.

    We'll We made plans to meet up tonight at 7 for a movie on Friday. I called him this afternoon after i got off work at 2 and was going to get my haircut and he said he was still on and excited.

    Well I hop in teh shower at 530 and get out to this text
    "Hey, I'm going to have to cancel tonight, this homework is taking alot longer than expected. I'm sorry."

    So. I am naturally quite crushed by this as I have been running my mouth to my friends about this guy and have been super figgin excited all week. I'm considering making this relationship more concrete. The only respone i could think of was;

    " Good luck on your Homework, I understand. Ill call you tommrow."


    what would've been your response?
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    Feb 16, 2009 12:07 AM GMT
    Don't take it personal. He probably did have a lot of homework to do. I think your reply was fine...give him a chance to make it up to you. icon_smile.gif

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    Feb 16, 2009 12:08 AM GMT
    Heh i know that, i don't think he's lie to me as, he called of work to spend more time with me last time.
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    Feb 16, 2009 1:07 AM GMT
    Give him the benefit of the doubt. If he does it again, have Sedative send his minions to deal with him icon_twisted.gif
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    Feb 16, 2009 1:14 AM GMT
    I'd tactfully express my disappointment, but otherwise, I'd say something along those same lines.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Feb 16, 2009 1:17 AM GMT
    I would have responded the way you did.
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    Feb 16, 2009 1:18 AM GMT
    BTW, I don't know about you young'ns, but cancelling a date via SMS is kinda tacky, IMHO.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Feb 16, 2009 1:20 AM GMT
    You said the right thing.. you handled in a mature and reasonable way.

    If there is anything more, you'll find out soon enough, but always be reasonable, if you hadn't it would be a red flag to him. Best wishes, I hope all work out very well for you.
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    Feb 16, 2009 1:24 AM GMT
    mFit saidGive him the benefit of the doubt. If he does it again, have Sedative send his minions to deal with him icon_twisted.gif


    Very good advice!
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    Feb 16, 2009 1:33 AM GMT
    Timberoo saidI would have responded the way you did.


    Same.

    Things come up in life and I think that we need to remember that it's not always an excuse to get out of plans.

    He probably was really busy with homework. Just if it keeps happening talk to him about it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2009 4:07 AM GMT
    Most gays are flaky. You just have to adjust to being stood up. I know I'll get all kinds of flak for saying this, but it's the truth. The very guys who will say they aren't flaky themselves are the worst offenders.

    I've met very few reliable and dependable gay men in my life. They were the keepers. The rest are what most gay men are: selfish shits.
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    Feb 16, 2009 4:12 AM GMT
    I think guys should understand that their dates/boyfriends/husbands have obligations that come up, so I'd be ok with it, although I'd obliquely express some disappointment. He'll make it up to you icon_smile.gif

    (PS, text messaging was not inappropriate IMO. What matters is the information communicated. At least he let you know and apologized... I had a date recently where I got stood up, I waited out in the cold for him for a half hour before I gave up icon_sad.gif)
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    Feb 16, 2009 4:29 AM GMT
    I would give him the benefit of the doubt and see what happens in the future. Since it is Friday in the back of my mind I would think of how he probably still has Saturday and Sunday to work on it.
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    Feb 16, 2009 4:37 AM GMT
    Hey - I screwed up in a similar manner and was given a second-chance. It's uncool, but school has to come first. Might just let him know that a call would have been better than the text msg. Good luck!
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    Feb 16, 2009 5:43 AM GMT
    not steamed about it was just disappointed and posted about it =P
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    Feb 16, 2009 6:50 AM GMT
    I would have acted like I wasn't really that excited to see him. Heh. Same response as you probably.

    mFit saidGive him the benefit of the doubt. If he does it again, have Sedative send his minions to deal with him icon_twisted.gif


    I require the usual payment of souls and cookies, of course.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2009 7:18 AM GMT
    It is always disappointing to get plans canceled when you’re really excited about doing something, but think about what a great opportunity this is! You said in your profile that you’ve been so busy with work that you have had no time to even find a gym. Maybe you could consider taking this opportunity to get back in touch with activities, friends or projects that you had previously neglected. You’ll have countless moments to spend with this special person, but you will never get back the moments you spent feeling disappointed. Your response was on point, perhaps tomorrow you can thank him for giving you this chance to make time for reconnecting with and doing something special for yourself.
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    Feb 18, 2009 2:18 AM GMT
    Well he friend zoned me