How to make friends in new city on your own?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 21, 2017 12:36 AM GMT
    I will be moving away from all of my family and friends in July to pursue my Master's degree at Missouri State. I have never been totally on my own before, and am slightly apprehensive. I would call myself an introvert, but do like to socialize. Being a full time student and holding an assistantship will keep me busy, but the month leading up to the start of the term will have me (hopefully not) despondent in my apartment. Do any of you homies have any tips on how to meet people within my community? Thank you!
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    Apr 21, 2017 12:48 AM GMT
    Nebraskakid467 said
    Do any of you homies have any tips on how to meet people within my community? Thank you!

    First, congrats on your continuing education.

    Second, what community interests you. Gay, straight, or not important?
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    Apr 21, 2017 12:59 AM GMT
    Thank you! And it does not matter to me; I love an eclectic group of people!
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    Apr 21, 2017 1:13 AM GMT
    Congratulations on graduate school.
    There's no magic way to make friends. Smile. Say "hello". Complain about the weather. Accept reasonable social invitations. Keep it in your pants.
  • roadbikeRob

    Posts: 17347

    Apr 21, 2017 11:57 AM GMT
    Strike up a friendly conversation with a stranger and even introduce yourself at the end of the conversation. That has always worked well for me. icon_smile.gif
  • bro4bro

    Posts: 1706

    Apr 21, 2017 4:46 PM GMT
    Join a gym (or go to the one at your school)
    Go there regularly, same time every day
    Work out hard so they'll know you're serious
    Smile and nod at the other regulars, and say hi
    Instant friends!
  • NearTheBorder

    Posts: 55

    Apr 22, 2017 3:02 AM GMT
    I think joining a gym, taking a class there. Good options.
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    Apr 22, 2017 3:28 AM GMT
    Nebraskakid467 said
    Thank you! And it does not matter to me; I love an eclectic group of people!

    When i came here I didn't know anyone. So I immediately joined the local Gay & Lesbian Community Center (since renamed). I became a volunteer. I worked their front desk, answeting phones and welcoming people. They had a ton of reference books at the desk, with all kinds of gay community info. I learned a helluva lot.

    And prominent GLBT came in every day, that I met. I still know them as friends. I got a quick education. And hope maybe I did some good. Within a year I got awarded with "Volunteer of the Year".

    Yah know, you just plunge in. You jump in with both feet. You can't be shy or reticent.

    BTW, Omaha had (has?) an incredible gay club. The Max. I've been there many times. You been?

    I don't know anything about Missouri. Been there, no idea about the gay scene.
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    Apr 22, 2017 3:24 PM GMT
    Thank you everyone for the advice! I will def be joining the campus gym, and hoping to meet some regulars there. And art deco, I love to volunteer so that is a viable option for me. The Max is indeed in Omaha, except like most gay bars it seems like, has been overrun by straight clientile. It is the only dance club here, so that is probably why...mainly on the weekends, but during the week it is mainly the gay regulars.
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    Apr 22, 2017 3:37 PM GMT
    Nebraskakid467 saidThank you! And it does not matter to me; I love an eclectic group of people!



    Eclectic is the way to go. Listen at your age it is quite easy because there are so many people at that age in your position looking for friends. It is much harder when everyone your age is married and settled. A lot of advice here is good. Make sure you get out of the house on a regular basis. Going to the gym or a park is a good idea. Look at meetup and see if there is a group that interests you. Taking up an athletic hobby is a great idea. When I lived in Charlotte I met a ton of people whitewater kayaking and we depended on each other to run rivers. If you want to go out by yourself but are hesitant, go to a pub with good food, sit at the bar and order something to eat. Be open to talking to the people sitting next to you. The more comfortable you get with that the more you will come out of your shell.
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    Apr 22, 2017 3:52 PM GMT
    friendormate said
    Nebraskakid467 saidThank you! And it does not matter to me; I love an eclectic group of people!



    Eclectic is the way to go. Listen at your age it is quite easy because there are so many people at that age in your position looking for friends. It is much harder when everyone your age is married and settled. A lot of advice here is good. Make sure you get out of the house on a regular basis. Going to the gym or a park is a good idea. Look at meetup and see if there is a group that interests you. Taking up an athletic hobby is a great idea. When I lived in Charlotte I met a ton of people whitewater kayaking and we depended on each other to run rivers. If you want to go out by yourself but are hesitant, go to a pub with good food, sit at the bar and order something to eat. Be open to talking to the people sitting next to you. The more comfortable you get with that the more you will come out of your shell.


    Awesome advice. I think there is so much to learn from every age group; generational differences. A lot of my peers close themselves off to people their own age, and are missing so much in life.
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 20574

    Apr 22, 2017 4:55 PM GMT
    Unless you're completely introverted and have a problem communicating with people, you will probably just meet people naturally through your daily activities with school and around where you live. Joining a gym, a church, or local community organizations in things you may enjoy like a biking club or hiking club, gay volleyball league, volunteer groups, etc are also good ways to meet people.
  • mybud

    Posts: 13485

    Apr 22, 2017 5:19 PM GMT
    You appear to be a very personable person. Don't let it get into your head, you'll be fine...Missouri State is in Kirksville, right?