Oral pleasure sexual pleasure issues???

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    Feb 18, 2009 11:35 PM GMT
    New poster here, not sure how to word this or put it ontoforum post, but I will try. Whenever I am getting orally pleasured from men, it usually take an incredible amount of time to get me to finish and often times it takes a little bit to get me really hard. (this is with strangers in semi public places) Sometimes I find I need to take matters into my own hand to finsih. Which kind of makes me feel bad, because some of these guys are really doing a heck of a job and I really would love to give them the reward they worked so hard to get. Now on the flip side for this, when I am with a woman, most times, we do a little oral then off we go and I finish in under 5 minutes a lot of times. How can I take so long from a guy to get off, and a woman who I am having sex with gets me to blow my load so fast? This is with or without condom for the sex part from a woman. I am wishing I could last a bit longer with a woman, and a bit less with a man. Any thoughts or suggestions for me on this?

    thanks much in advance
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    Feb 19, 2009 1:09 AM GMT
    Some possibilities:

    If your oral sex is "with strangers in semi-public places" you could be suffering from fear & guilt, and aren't able to fully relax. I assume your sex with women is in settings of greater privacy? So that can make the comparison not valid.

    While some people get additional sexual excitement from sex in public places, and with strangers, for others it can put a damper on their ability to perform. Try a blowjob with a man in private, in a place where you feel safe & secure.

    Also, hate to tell you this, but at 43 you may be starting to lose some sensitivity in your penis, which is common. It happened to me at about your age, making oral sex increasing difficult for me to enjoy to climax. Nowadays the guy has to suck like a Hoover to get me off.

    As skin sensitivity declines the importance of keeping tight pressure on the shaft increases. A woman's vagina is lined with muscles for this purpose, and is probably still providing that extra pressure you require. You need to find a guy who knows how to apply great pressure with his mouth, not just licking and sliding loosely up and down your dick. He needs to suck your insides out.

    Another possibility may be that women simply stimulate you sexually more than men do. You may be on the straight side of bisexual on the Kinsey scale. You haven't told us your sexual orientation & history.

    Hope these suggestions help.
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    Feb 19, 2009 3:42 AM GMT
    Some guys just don't know how to suck a cock. In my experience, many just think that bobbing their head up and down with their lips stroking your shaft will do the trick. Maybe it does for some, but I personally need someone who can suck a golfball through a garden hose going to town on it.

    I'd have to say though, it takes me a while before I'm able to cum from getting a blowjob as well. It generally takes a guy nomming away at me for quite some time to be able to actually ejaculate from it, and I usually have to think of something else. I've only had one guy that could really get me going well, but he was a total whore and knew how to take some cock down his throat. ( I mean that as a huge compliment, btw...) icon_biggrin.gif

    And after Red Vespa's reply, my future isn't looking so great...
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    Feb 19, 2009 5:22 AM GMT

    Are you Catholic? icon_eek.gif