Recently infected...


  • May 24, 2017 3:08 PM GMT
    Hi guys, how r you?
    Not that I want to complain or sth but yesterday I did three ELISA HIV tests because I had a strange flu last week and ... they were all reactive. All good, just a virus, there are good medications nowadays plus many support groups and stuff... but while I was feeling pretty ok yesterday.. today is another story. I've been sitting on the couch all day today, and thinking of all the restrictions this infection will now pose on my life. I'm almost sure I'll be in good health. But I've been thinking of all the guys I will not have access to now.. not that I want to sleep with everyone. But for example recently I've met two guys, both of them were really nice and were responding positively to me so I was thinking of dating long term one of them, they were both a good match, but now I need to forget about this. I shrank my dating options by 95% due to my irresponsible behavior the last few months. And while nobody of my sexual partners for the last two months has ever inserted anything inside me against my will, some of them are strangely calm about the fact that I'm infected. Or may be I'm just suspicious, but I really hope that the guy who's infected me does not know and has done it due to ignorance. It will be cruel if some1 has done it deliberatelly to me. My blood is still being tested for confirmation with western blot etc... but 3 ELISA tests showed I'm infected so I'm not really wasting energy on vain hopes it may be false results. I know I will be good but ... it was goind so well with my dating life recently.. and it's funny because I had bb sex like seven times since the beginning of the year and I still managed to get infected. I really feel like getting wasted today for several days upfront but have no money. Oh yes, I'm getting paid on a project basis and can get cash tomorrow morning and drug myself into semi-unconciousness till the wb results are ready but I don't really feel like working today... F*ck it. Thanks for reading.
  • Eli_jah

    Posts: 1637

    Jun 06, 2017 11:27 PM GMT
    Hi, sorry about your situation. You said you had bb sex seven times this year, but I hear about people who have bb sex for years and never become positive. Were you on Prep whilst barebacking? I'm guessing not. I'm just curious about the decisions some guys make in the months/years before. Elijah.
  • Happenis

    Posts: 496

    Jun 28, 2017 5:30 PM GMT
    Sorry to hear about this.

    It's sad that those guys were "strangely calm" about it. It's alarming because a lot of men simply do not care about catching or spreading HIV/AIDS. Many just care about getting the best possible pleasure within that moment at whatever means necessary! A few people out there (not all) even make it into a twisted game to see how many people they can infect (out of spite).

    Back when I was single, many men offered (and begged) to bareback me but I always said NO to all of them even if they claimed to be "clean", " healthy", "neg", " on prep", etc. The ONLY guy that I've ever barebacked with was my current boyfriend and we both waited several months and got tested for everything first. We are both negative.

    You really can't trust anybody out there. A lot of people out there do not care about themselves and others. Please be safe out there. Even if you do have HIV, there's still a lot of other things that you don't wanna catch that can do even more damage (including a worse strain of the virus) so STAY SAFE!
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    Jun 29, 2017 11:29 AM GMT
    mynicknamehere saidand it's funny because I had bb sex like seven times since the beginning of the year and I still managed to get infected.


    I'm sorry you've had this difficult news, but this kind of struck me. You've been having bareback sex with partners who you don't know their status and you seem to be surprised that you ended up being infected? I don't understand that. You must have known the risks and you chose to go ahead anyway. Please make sure you manage yourself and your sexlife a little more wisely in future - remember HIV isn't the only thing you expose yourself to when you have bareback sex.
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    Jun 29, 2017 11:41 AM GMT
    mynicknamehere said
    Not that I want to complain or sth [?] but yesterday I did three ELISA HIV tests because I had a strange flu last week and ... they were all reactive.

    Early flu-like symptoms are typical when a person contracts HIV. Now that you know you have it, take immediate action. Delaying is not good.

    I know quite a number of guys who've had HIV for well over 30+ years. That's about as long as anyone in the US can have had it. The bitch is you've gotta start meds early and stay on them. Have you begun that?

  • Ubeaut

    Posts: 224

    Aug 25, 2017 9:13 AM GMT
    Why on earth are worried about who might or might not date you at some point in the future.

    Why shouldn't people be calm about your HIV status? Get on treatment and get your viral load down. You'll live a long life if you take your medications and look after yourself.

    I've been living with an HIV diagnosis for 32 years, its not the end of the world and its not the end of your love life or sex life.
  • timmm55

    Posts: 13

    Jan 27, 2018 6:17 PM GMT
    Very sorry to hear this. I see you are from South Korea. HIV care there is quite different.

    Even more sorry about the blame being thrown around here.
    “I think there is perhaps more discrimination from the gay community toward people living with HIV than from heterosexuals,” said Cho. “There is this notion that if you have HIV you are promiscuous and are not living by the required moral standards.”https://thediplomat.com/2017/06/in-south-korea-being-hiv-positive-might-prevent-you-from-accessing-healthcare/
    We are often our own worst enemies.

    I've been POZ since 1985 when I was tested. Probably since 1982. Doing great! Better than ever even at 62!

    https://www.hrw.org/news/2017/05/05/south-korea-should-get-real-hiv S Korea sounds backwards for such a advanced economy.

    Find a good HIV specialist and get on antivirals NOW.






    [quote]

    [cite]mynicknamehere said[/cite]Hi guys, how r you?
    Not that I want to complain or sth but yesterday I did three ELISA HIV tests because I had a strange flu last week and ... they were all reactive. All good, just a virus, there are good medications nowadays plus many support groups and stuff... but while I was feeling pretty ok yesterday.. today is another story. I've been sitting on the couch all day today, and thinking of all the restrictions this infection will now pose on my life. I'm almost sure I'll be in good health. But I've been thinking of all the guys I will not have access to now.. not that I want to sleep with everyone. But for example recently I've met two guys, both of them were really nice and were responding positively to me so I was thinking of dating long term one of them, they were both a good match, but now I need to forget about this. I shrank my dating options by 95% due to my irresponsible behavior the last few months. And while nobody of my sexual partners for the last two months has ever inserted anything inside me against my will, some of them are strangely calm about the fact that I'm infected. Or may be I'm just suspicious, but I really hope that the guy who's infected me does not know and has done it due to ignorance. It will be cruel if some1 has done it deliberatelly to me. My blood is still being tested for confirmation with western blot etc... but 3 ELISA tests showed I'm infected so I'm not really wasting energy on vain hopes it may be false results. I know I will be good but ... it was goind so well with my dating life recently.. and it's funny because I had bb sex like seven times since the beginning of the year and I still managed to get infected. I really feel like getting wasted today for several days upfront but have no money. Oh yes, I'm getting paid on a project basis and can get cash tomorrow morning and drug myself into semi-unconciousness till the wb results are ready but I don't really feel like working today... F*ck it. Thanks for reading. [/quote]