Should I approach him?

  • mdclark91

    Posts: 3

    Sep 06, 2017 6:04 AM GMT
    I'm a grad student. Last semester I walked into the library and saw this really attractive guy looking at me. His gaze wouldn't break; everywhere I went, his eyes followed, and he was grinning nervously. I went up to him, started some conversation and flirted a bit. He got kind of nervous, and then wouldn't talk to me or even look at me for the rest of the semester. I saw him again recently, and gingerly asked if I had made him uncomfortable last semester. He shrugged and told me not to worry about it. I recently found on Instagram that he definitely is into guys, and I'd like to try again with him, this time without being so aggressive. Should I ask him if he'd like to grab coffee, and if so, when would be a good time to approach him?
  • Happenis

    Posts: 383

    Sep 06, 2017 1:23 PM GMT
    mdclark91 saidI'm a grad student. Last semester I walked into the library and saw this really attractive guy looking at me. His gaze wouldn't break; everywhere I went, his eyes followed, and he was grinning nervously. I went up to him, started some conversation and flirted a bit. He got kind of nervous, and then wouldn't talk to me or even look at me for the rest of the semester. I saw him again recently, and gingerly asked if I had made him uncomfortable last semester. He shrugged and told me not to worry about it. I recently found on Instagram that he definitely is into guys, and I'd like to try again with him, this time without being so aggressive. Should I ask him if he'd like to grab coffee, and if so, when would be a good time to approach him?


    I say give it another try; the WORST that he could say is "no". And even if he says " no" then so what? (1) There's still plenty of other guys out there and at least you tried (instead of worrying about "what if" for the rest of your life) and (2) Who needs a socially awkward guy like that anyways lol

    Good luck!
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16404

    Sep 06, 2017 3:10 PM GMT
    I agree with the guys above, life is about taking the initiative. If you do nothing, you lose and you have about everything to gain. My only caution would be to come across the right way, charming, polite and not too strong. Have fun with it!
  • k15thelement

    Posts: 445

    Sep 06, 2017 3:23 PM GMT
    HndsmKansan saidI agree with the guys above, life is about taking the initiative. If you do nothing, you lose and you have about everything to gain. My only caution would be to come across the right way, charming, polite and not too strong. Have fun with it!


    True. I like Mel Robbins "5 Second Rule"

    The moment you have an instinct to act on a goal, you have only 5 seconds to physically act on it before your mind works to stop you. If you see him again and have a good vibe then WALK OVER THERE!! I'm a big believer in following instincts. You'll almost never be wrong for doing it.
  • spider

    Posts: 331

    Sep 09, 2017 10:25 PM GMT
    nothing vetured..nothing gained as they say...ask him for a coffee and see how it goes..good luck
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 10, 2017 7:11 PM GMT
    Carpe Diem! Good luck!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Sep 14, 2017 1:30 AM GMT
    Sure why not, he maybe just getting used to dating guys and newly out gay. Lol, If you think he's into dudes, then go for it. icon_biggrin.gif