Moving on...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 21, 2009 4:36 PM GMT
    I broke up with my first real boyfriend a little over two years ago. His birthday was the other day, and I had to force myself not to call him to say happy birthday. I'm not crazy. I'm not obsessed. I've dated since, but is it weird that on some level, I'll always think of him on his birthday or when I see a pirate (crazy hobby of his...) OK so really I just needed a reason to post this song, because it made me think of him this morning, and lord knows I love me some kelly, and apparently run on sentences.....

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bap-oZI-Grc
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 21, 2009 5:30 PM GMT
    when you really fall in love, the feelings never disappear, they just slowly fade and sometimes they bounce back at the drop of a hat
  • Nicobx15

    Posts: 54

    Feb 21, 2009 6:21 PM GMT
    FirefighterBlu3 saidwhen you really fall in love, the feelings never disappear, they just slowly fade and sometimes they bounce back at the drop of a hat


    Exactly! And that's the beauty in it all....sad as it may feel at the time!
    There's an old song that says, "a fool will lose tomorrow, looking back at yesterday"

    Embrace the memories and good times, all the while looking ahead, for they will come again!
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    Feb 21, 2009 7:42 PM GMT
    jprichva said
    FirefighterBlu3 saidwhen you really fall in love, the feelings never disappear, they just slowly fade and sometimes they bounce back at the drop of a hat


    That is so fucking true. They tell you time makes it hurt less, but that isn't the case...time just makes the moments when it does hurt come less and less often...but when they come, WHAM.


    It hurts.
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    Feb 21, 2009 9:45 PM GMT
    Me too, Matterych. But I called mine. In fairness, he called me (well, texted) on my B-day... so I thought it was the right thing to do. It went straight to voicemail.

    I am glad I did it though. THere is some level of satisfaction that comes from feeling like you did the right thing (like just being nice) even when you don't really want to. (Not to say that you should have called him... just that I knew I would feel bad if I did not call mine).
  • joeindallas

    Posts: 484

    Feb 21, 2009 9:52 PM GMT
    Giving a person a B-Day wish even if not your BF any more is merely being Civil. You broke up with him, I doubt you hate him you just do not love him as much as you once did anymore BIG DIFFERENCE
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    Feb 21, 2009 9:57 PM GMT
    KissingPro said
    jprichva said
    FirefighterBlu3 saidwhen you really fall in love, the feelings never disappear, they just slowly fade and sometimes they bounce back at the drop of a hat


    That is so fucking true. They tell you time makes it hurt less, but that isn't the case...time just makes the moments when it does hurt come less and less often...but when they come, WHAM.


    It hurts.


    HELLO! Thank you! Yes, love is always wonderful, but it hurts like hell! I now know why so many men are so jaded. They don't want that pain. Hell, if every gay man fell hard for everyone they would've given a chance, every day of the week would be a reminder of good times gone.

    Anyone watch 'Splendor in the Grass'? The last scene is how I feel everyday. icon_neutral.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2009 3:10 PM GMT

    The hurt you feel when these feelings recur tells me how much you love and how powerful your hearts are. So instead of a bitterness or sadness, try thinking of it as a validation of your own genuine-ness. A sign-post that says, "YOU'RE A CATCH". Forgive your exes and have a little pity because
    Mom always says, "So you threw your pearls before swine (she's not calling exes pigs, by the way). Don't be surprised when they don't know what pearls are and trample them. Just don't you also forget that those pearls have huge value, and someone will come along that recognizes treasure when they see it."
    When I turned 34 after dating since 18, she was proved right.

    Take heart guys, it only happens til someone enters your life and you fall in love again.


    you guys! *hug* -Doug of meninlove
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2009 6:32 PM GMT
    just turn your feelings off- realize you're not comfortable feeling them, and shove them to the back of your mind- realize you're above them if you choose to be. maybe do some meditation envisioning your heart encased in ice. what, everyone doesn't do that? seriously?

    as for the song- just reprogram your brain to attach a different connotation- read a whole novel while playing the song on repeat in the background... forever after, the song will make you think of the book.

    you know you're really good at it when you can honestly forget exes names and not realize you had until a friend mentions them in conversation lol. suppression can be a beautiful, peaceful thing.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 22, 2009 6:36 PM GMT
    It's ok, really! Nothing wrong with remembering fondly!!!
  • jrs1

    Posts: 4388

    Jun 01, 2010 9:52 PM GMT