Living alone

  • zakariahzol

    Posts: 2241

    Feb 23, 2009 12:58 PM GMT
    Anybody here live by himself. Just you alone. I have been living by myself ever since my last housemate and his muscular bf move out in 2006. Frankly speaking I kinda enjoy it. I can do what I please, I dont have to take out the garbage if I dont feel like it and I can walk around naked if I feel like it.

    But there some moment , I wish there someone here beside me (my house is a three bedroom house, with a garden , attic and a bbq pit). Just like
    Norma Desmond in Sunset Boulavard, I long for companionship and someone to talk to. It kind of sad coming home to this big empty house , watching tv/internet , go to sleep and preparing to go to work again tommorrow morning.

    However , I prefer to be by myself than to live with some straight guys that didnt understand my sexuality. The fact that I am so busy and I travel most weekend mean I hardly have times to think about this very much ,just that I feel life will be so much fun and better if I am living with someone else. Please dont ask me to do something drastic like selling my house and move to a condominium.

    Any body else here in RJ live by yourself and how do you cope with issue like this.

    zak


  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Feb 23, 2009 1:14 PM GMT
    Hey Zak,
    I own my own home and live with my beagles. My bf and I live 90 miles apart, but he is here on a regular basis. There is a sense of being alone, but as busy as I am (and I'm not alone really, with my beagles, friends and
    other family members not that far away)... I really enjoy my solice, peace and quiet. It doesn't bother me in the least.

    I take it you don't have any canine or feline companions?

    icon_biggrin.gif
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    Feb 23, 2009 1:17 PM GMT
    I lived alone several times between 1981 and 1997. I used to like to alternate between living alone for a couple of years then living with others for a couple of years. If something happened to my partner I would probably live alone again. It has its' advantages and disadvantages.
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    Feb 23, 2009 2:17 PM GMT
    ...didn't Norma have a monkey? Why don't you consider a pet as the above poster suggested?

    I prefer not going out during the workweek... so you're routine actually appeals to me. Maybe volunteer or hit the gym after work if your evening schedule is so empty.
  • zakariahzol

    Posts: 2241

    Feb 23, 2009 2:19 PM GMT
    Hdsm,

    I have my cat Charlie. She a companion . Unfortunately she cant talk . Just like you I enjoy my solitude , peace and quiet. But there a moment I wish somebody else is here. Just like those days when my housemate use to live here , we use to have bbq in the garden, go to dinner together, talk about boys and watching movie.

    Probably between you and me, you have a bf that come to visit you and I dont have any. Living alone dont bother me, just I believe life will be merrier living with somebody else.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Feb 23, 2009 2:29 PM GMT
    I've never lived totally alone, just the occasional breaks where my bf is out of town or something like that.
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    Feb 23, 2009 4:31 PM GMT
    I live alone right now, I do enjoy having roommates, but I also like my personal time and my quiet house at times. My best friend lives across the street, so if I want company I can just go over to her house and hang out. The only real up-side to having a roommate is someone to split the bills with, though my last two roommates hardly ever had any money. Since I'm hardly ever home, I opted out of getting a pet and I'd have to pay more in rent to have one anyways. I have considered offering my spare room to a friend of mine, but since he lives at his parents house for free, it probably wouldn't make much sense for him to move out and start paying rent. Plus it's nice to have a spare bed when company comes.
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    Feb 23, 2009 4:31 PM GMT
    I live alone, my bf is only here maybe 1-2 days every 2 weeks...so I understand what your saying...I enjoy my time alone...but at the same time it can get maddening and lonely...

    I just try to stay busy and all that jazz...hey and if you get to bored theres always porn, haha...j/k.
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    Feb 23, 2009 4:32 PM GMT
    I live a lone and I have to say I love it! I'm getting a dog this year only because one I love dogs and two since I decided I'm pretty much staying in south for another couple of years. I would like to companionship, since there is no prospects of a relationship happening anytime soon. BLEK!icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif
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    Feb 23, 2009 4:41 PM GMT
    I live alone and enjoy it. There are times when you think about it, having others around is a good thing, whether it be a partner or flat-mates. Yet, especially with flat-mates, the thought of having to entertain someone or hear their BS or what not makes me revel in the fact that I live alone. Yet, living with your partner is different and can be a GREAT thing!!! Overall though, I am one who enjoys his one on one time with myself!
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    Feb 23, 2009 5:07 PM GMT
    I've lived alone since I got out of college - have had a few stints with short-term roommates.

    I've found as I get older, I really value my quiet time. ( I'm picturing Ben Stiller in "Dodgeball" ... "Me-shell, I'm having my personal reflection time...." )

    Anyways, despite being an extrovert, despite craving the energy of being around other people, it's indeed quite wonderful to have some down, alone time.

    Pets help for the lonely days. I have both a dog and a cat, they both provide wonderful company. So does that amazing invention, the telephone. If I'm feeling a need for extra contact, I invite a friend to lunch or dinner!
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    Feb 23, 2009 5:11 PM GMT
    I love my own Company!

    I do have a b/f but he lives in another city a bit far from me and we see each other when possible!
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    Feb 23, 2009 5:49 PM GMT
    I don't live alone now, but I did for quite a few years and I also loved it.

    I had two nights a week where friends came over every week for tea. One was Survivor night and I can't remember what the other night was for, but no doubt it was for reality TV. icon_redface.gif

    Make your own regular occasion. My friends didn't have high expectations for what was for tea. One would bring dessert, one would bring snacks and I'd do mains. Easy. Social. And still heaps of warm, comforting solitude. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Feb 23, 2009 5:50 PM GMT
    I live by myself! for 2 years....
    Its has to be a personal choice...yeah it sucks...cause Half the time there is no one here to talk with...but
    Iam picky anyhow....sort of a neat freak! ;)
  • Sparkycat

    Posts: 1064

    Feb 23, 2009 6:00 PM GMT
    Oh puhleeeeze spare me. Get a cat. Go to the gym. Take a night class. Go out to a coffee house and read a book. Whatever. Then count your blessings that you have a nice house to live in. There are a whole bunch of people losing their homes to forclosure or who have lost them to natural disasters that would love to be in your place.



    zakariahzol saidAnybody here live by himself. Just you alone. I have been living by myself ever since my last housemate and his muscular bf move out in 2006. Frankly speaking I kinda enjoy it. I can do what I please, I dont have to take out the garbage if I dont feel like it and I can walk around naked if I feel like it.

    But there some moment , I wish there someone here beside me (my house is a three bedroom house, with a garden , attic and a bbq pit). Just like
    Norma Desmond in Sunset Boulavard, I long for companionship and someone to talk to. It kind of sad coming home to this big empty house , watching tv/internet , go to sleep and preparing to go to work again tommorrow morning.

    However , I prefer to be by myself than to live with some straight guys that didnt understand my sexuality. The fact that I am so busy and I travel most weekend mean I hardly have times to think about this very much ,just that I feel life will be so much fun and better if I am living with someone else. Please dont ask me to do something drastic like selling my house and move to a condominium.

    Any body else here in RJ live by yourself and how do you cope with issue like this.

    zak


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    Feb 23, 2009 6:02 PM GMT
    I know what you mean. Its that moment in time when you realize damn Im pretty much all alone! The silence is deafening I know. What did I do?

    a) volunteered- became a reading partner to an adult literacy program 1x every two weeks. It was fun.

    b) volunteered at the local ASPCA. Thats how I ended up getting my cat.

    c) ended up taking a chinese cooking class...so now one of the options
    when I feel a lot lonely I grab the pots and pans and start cooking.

    d) when all else fails, run thru the house butt naked, horrifying the cat, eating
    way too much Moose track ice cream/ w oreos and playing blocks of Pat Benatar and Pink to while the time away! LOL
  • qalbi30

    Posts: 116

    Feb 23, 2009 6:29 PM GMT
    When you live alone it can be a great experience,you have time to collect your thoughts and enjoy the moment,it is up to you.

    Pleasure shared is pleasure doubled so they say,I have a B/F that visits at least once a week and I look forward to his visits.
    This has been ongoing for the last fifteen years and the friendship has deepened and not gone stale.

    Who knows if we had lived together what would have happened ? the fact that we have different interests and respect each others freedom is possibly the reason.

    When we first met he was a F/B and not a B/F,now I can count him as one of my best friends and the sex is still wonderful.

    My reason for mentioning this is to say that you can be alone and not lonely,it is another aspect of life.
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    Feb 23, 2009 6:38 PM GMT
    When I lived alone, I enjoyed it. I liked being able to shut my door and keep the world out while I enjoyed my world within. I had control of my own time. I love to read. I went out dancing when I wanted to socialize or go out with friends.
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    Feb 23, 2009 6:39 PM GMT
    I have lived alone for the past year. When I think about roommates I think of my last situation and am very very VERY glad that it is not an issue anymore.

    Ask yourself:

    Does your need for someone in your house outweigh your wanting to be alone?

    Would a pet be more beneficial than an actual person living with you?
  • imperator

    Posts: 626

    Feb 24, 2009 3:17 AM GMT
    I long for the day that I can afford to live alone (or with my bf if he's still lurking about when I can afford to live alone). Roommates take up so much room with their stuff in the fridge and their superfluous dishes and their occasional litter. I like my privacy, and everything in its place, and my peace and quiet, and my lights off when a room's empty, and my fridge uncluttered. Or like the book says-- "Hell is other people."
  • metalxracr

    Posts: 761

    Feb 24, 2009 3:33 AM GMT
    I've only lived alone once! I always had roommates, and then I lived in a fraternity house for a little bit. After that semester was over, I got my own place and didn't think much of it till I moved in... then it was so dead and boring and quiet I wanted to go crazy, I was hardly ever home during the day!!
    As soon as the semester was over I moved in with two guys. I like having company, it's not so boring!
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    Feb 24, 2009 3:40 AM GMT
    I live alone and it gets lonely sometimes..
  • Mikeylikesit

    Posts: 1021

    Feb 24, 2009 3:47 AM GMT
    I've basically lived alone for 12 years.........I dont think I would have it any other way.........I enjoy my freedom.......icon_biggrin.gif
  • jlly_rnchr

    Posts: 1759

    Feb 24, 2009 4:24 AM GMT
    My best living situation was the year following graduation from college, when I was living with my best friend (she was my hook-up pal all four years of college).

    We weren't involved like that anymore, so there was no intimidating pressure. We just sat around after work most nights, watching TV together, listening to music, smokin' a little (lot). This "social time" might not seem that exciting until you have to do all these daily things by yourself. I even loved going to the grocery store with her. Having company always makes things better.

    Now I live in a 1 BR apartment, and it's depressingly lonely. I work out alone, I watch TV alone (usually), and eat dinner alone (usually). I don't like it. Still beats living with my parents though.
  • jgymnast733

    Posts: 1783

    Feb 24, 2009 5:05 AM GMT
    I love living alone and believe me being in manhattan aint cheap,even though i'm on the 35th floor in a 2bedroom apartment with a wrap around terrace facing central park, i would kill for a yard.,are you kidding? Just thinking about planting trees and shrubs makes me jealous of you..... Count your blessings man, if you get lonely adopt some pets..
    BE HAPPY..icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif