When your friend or BF becomes a go-go...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 16, 2007 4:21 PM GMT
    What are your thoughts on go-go boys? Do you have any friends that dance? Would you be upset if your boyfriend wanted to do it?
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    Oct 16, 2007 5:16 PM GMT
    WELL i mean... i'm not biased or anything, BUT i'd be okay with it provided they were smart and didnt get caught up in the drinking and drugs that can go along with the job of being a go-go boy or stripper.

    Contray to poplar belife it's a REALLY hard job if you want to be successful at it. Been doing it for 9 years now and i have seen boys come and go realitively fast because of stupid choices.

    Of the boys i work with i only have a few that i consider anything more than a co-worker. Ego and jealousy are also a big part of the life. AGAIN something to get passed.

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    Oct 16, 2007 5:48 PM GMT
    Would you be upset if your boyfriend wanted to do it?

    Hell, I'd hire him!(For a private party!)

    R
  • DiverScience

    Posts: 1426

    Oct 16, 2007 6:32 PM GMT
    Not really. I don't date stupid people so I'd presume he's be smart about it.

    I was offered jobs as a go-go boy when I was in college, and would have accepted if I wasn't too busy with sports. So why shouldn't my BF/S.O.?
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    Oct 16, 2007 6:33 PM GMT
    ::sigh:: none of my co-workers are as hot as DiverScience icon_cry.gif
  • Nudista

    Posts: 158

    Oct 16, 2007 7:06 PM GMT
    Call me Old Fashioned but if my bro wanted to be a "go-go dancer" he knows to end it with me before even letting me know of his new idea.

    That simply won't fly with me.....and if i know him well- he'd cut me out in a second if i brought up such an idea.

    Both of us are free to be who we are...but that has never been his nor my character to want this.
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    Oct 16, 2007 7:13 PM GMT
    I always have to giggle at the insecurity of the question posed. I'm also entertained by those who are threatened by the whole thing.

    Two responses:
    1. If you're hot enough, interesting enough, smart enough, and cool enough, that an ultra-hot guy wants to call you his bud, you must be doing something RIGHT! Kudos to you! Remember, he / she chose you, and could have chosen others.

    2. If you can get someone to buy what most folks can't beg to give away, then you have something going. You would do well do learn from that. People don't just dumbly throw money around.

    Appearance (muscle, fitness level, charisma) are all attractive at the primal level. Some refuse to admit that, but, that is part of the human condition.

    Daily I'm inundated by folks who are skinny, fat, ugly, out-of-shape, etc., who get all cranky when I don't share their attraction. Muscles, smarts, etc., as I said attract folks at a primal level. So called straight guys give me offers a couple of times a week.

    Adult entertainment (be it dancing, or porn) is just what it is: entertainment. Folks go have one night stands all the time, and seem to hold that to a different standard.

    I said I'd never do porn, despite receiving frequent offers, and I never have, but, I did work for U.S. Male, and had a blast doing it.

    I know, from where I sit, I would never want a boyfriend / girlfriend threatened by looks / occupation. That sort of insecurity is a major turnoff. Like a pictureless, folks that don't like themselves just don't get very far with me.

    I think it's sad that those that would condemn being an escort, or being a dancer, are the first to blast dic pics all over The Cloud.

    If you can get someone to pay you for something most folks can't give away, good for you!

    Double standards abound in society. This is yet another.
  • Squarejaw

    Posts: 1035

    Oct 16, 2007 7:23 PM GMT
    "If you're hot enough, interesting enough, smart enough, and cool enough, that an ultra-hot guy wants to call you his bud..."

    That's classic, Chucky. I can always tell how smart someone is by how hot his friends are! icon_lol.gif
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    Oct 16, 2007 7:25 PM GMT
    Hey there guys. First of all, this is my first post reply (i dont know what this is called)

    But I used to be a go-go boy when i was in Roma, so i dont know if it is different here in America. oh it was also at a straight club. I did it for 2 reasons.

    a) i love to dance
    b) it really is great exercise

    It should not matter if a boyfriend is a go-go boy or not. Well if they are only a go-go boy. If they are doing more than that~ then that is a different story.

    I was dating a guy when i was go-going and he couldnt handle it. But he also could not handle my real job either (which is why we broke up)

    At the bar i was dancing at, i danced on the bar and had a body guard so that if i tapped his shoulder, anyone bothering me would...disappear.

    And also the bottom line, is i might be dancing or flirting...but at the end of the night, there was one person i was going home with...my boyfriend. So if you both know that, there should not be a problem.
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    Oct 16, 2007 7:32 PM GMT
    I would have say ABSOLUTELY NOT This is not about me The fact that your boyfriend came to you and said that this is what he would like to do says a lot about him. Sometimes a Go-Go Dancer is just that a Dancer.
    Believe it or not there are some who are just shirtless and not in nude or partially nude. Then you have the flip side. If you could live with your bf doing it and if his attention towards you does not change and if there aren't in "PRIVATE-OUT CALLS".

    I would say you are pretty safe. You would have be very SECURE with who you are and TRUST him implicitly for you too survive. Also is this a short-term or long term deal.

    There is a lot of ground that has to be covered and you have to sort out the pit-falls both seen and unseen.

    Can you handle your bf being a one of their popular dancers and that he going to have to do some flirting to get tips. You have to ask your self can you live with it. Because live with it is what you will have to do. If you can’t then you have to make a decision about the relationship.
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    Oct 16, 2007 7:43 PM GMT
    There is a LOT more to being a successful stripper or go-go boy than JUST being hot.

    I've always looked at what i do as something very similar to what a geisha would have done, entertain and sell an fantasy.

    To be successful you have to be REALLY smart and on your game. You have to be engaging and witty and creative. I've lasted this long on 2 things... 1. I can dance. That's what i was trained to do so i do it. I always mix it up with different styles of music, usually keeping in mind that what is commercial sells. I've used props like the bullwhip and the sai as well. HELL During Halloween i even go so far as to bust out "Thriller" and "vomit" up Hershey's syrup all over myself like fake blood. 2. I pay attention. When a guy is talking to me the whole "You're hot" thing only lasts a few seconds. And they will only say that so many times before there is nothing else to say, SO it's important that the guys you see over and over again and you have a rapport. I know what all the bar regulars drink, i know there jobs, i remember what they share with me and i ask them about it the next time i see them. That's whats made me their favorite. Not my body or my face, not the fact that i can pull my leg up to the side of my head or crack a bullwhip. YES that got their attention, but like Madonna said "A look can get you in a room, but something has to keep you there."

    It's very important that you have energy too. I mean, hours and hours of walking around on a bar and dancing your ass off isnt easy for anyone. Takes a lot of endurance and stamina, and could that with smiling and winking and such all night long...

    None of my ex's have ever had a problem with me being a stripper, and a lot of my friends, even in the legit dance world, love coming to see me at the bars.

    If there is trust in the relationship there shouldn't be any problem. And as far as your question genqb... u and i have talked about it before, but why dont BOTH of you do it... together. It might just spice things up!
  • DiverScience

    Posts: 1426

    Oct 16, 2007 7:54 PM GMT
    ::sigh:: none of my co-workers are as hot as DiverScience

    ::blush::

    Thanks, SR. Unfortunately, Boston seems to favor the much much larger go-go boys, so there's no chance of it here even if I wanted to drive out there every weekend.
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    Oct 16, 2007 7:56 PM GMT
    That's what i had heard Diver... but there is a bar there... Paradise i think... that REALLY wants me to come out, they have for a while.

    Perhaps they think that something different would liven things up a bit.
  • DiverScience

    Posts: 1426

    Oct 16, 2007 8:03 PM GMT
    Haven't ever been to Paradise.



    I think this is something people forget:

    If he is yours, he will come back to you. If he doesn't, he was never yours at all.
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    Oct 16, 2007 8:05 PM GMT
    Gengb-

    Talk to your BF and let him know how you really feel about it. It does not matter what any of us thinks about your situation because we are not living in it. You are. The more you talk about it with him the more secure or insecure you may realize that you are about it.



    To say nothing about what your feelings are good, bad or indiffrent and to just go along with the program (I'm not saying that you are or that this is your position because I don't know) is not a good idea.

    Anything short of letting your bf know what your feelings are could lead to the deconstruction of your relationship.

    Again Good Luck.
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    Oct 16, 2007 8:12 PM GMT
    In defense of All the GO-GO DANCERS AND PRON STARS.

    Str8hardbody- Go-Go Dancers and Gay Adult Film Stars are people to and deserve to br treated with dignity and respect also.

    How can we demand respect from the mainstream when we don't even display it ourselves.

    WOW!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 16, 2007 8:13 PM GMT
    Thank you Phoenix!
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    Oct 16, 2007 8:37 PM GMT
    I line up with Phoenix on that one, too.

    I'd rather make decisions about people on a 1-at-a-time basis.

    I've known some wonderful guys who have danced, some who have done porn films, some that have hooked, for that matter.

    I've also known some ministers, some lawyers, some social workers, and some doctors who were real low-life jerks.

    To me, it's all about the person - not the job.

    J.
  • Nudista

    Posts: 158

    Oct 16, 2007 8:43 PM GMT
    I respect everyone's opinions even if i I don't understand them....but think about this:

    IF...you really care about and have deep feelings for your partner....with ALL the jobs available out there, what part of Go-Go Dancing makes you believe that that is the best choice in terms of showing respect and loyalty? A night full of flirting, entertaining, amusing, impressing...all with a sexual undertone.

    Yeah, whats really yours should come back...but i don't think its about his coming back...as much as it is about his decision to go out in the first place.

    My partner gets hit on all the time when he goes to work or anywhere else...he's a great looking guy and I accept that fully and with confidence. But going to work is one thing...choosing to be a Go-go dancer and slap your partner with the "If your confident-you'll have no problem" line....is something completely different in my opinion. Why test people? Especially someone you really care about and love???? With so many choices...why this one??? Security/Insecurity has little to do with it. This is fully an issue of Respect.

    Clearly many people will not share my view...thats why we are not all compatible. But this is just one man's opinion guys. icon_wink.gif

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 16, 2007 8:59 PM GMT
    str8hardbody:
    As always, your response surprises no one. What is surprising is that you even bothered to read this thread considering that you have "NO RESPECT FOR GO-GO DANCER & PORN STARS."


    phoenix43:
    I appreciate your concern, but it's not my boyfriend that is interested in dancing...


    --Thanks for the responses guys, please keep them coming!


    PS. Rocco, you're fucking fantastic!


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    Oct 16, 2007 9:07 PM GMT

    I work in the private sector and “TRUST” me when I say that the industry that I work in the level of disrespect for admin staff is just a disgrace.

    When I was a dancer back in my prime the one thing that I got tired of saying is I'm classically trained and when on to list my resume. Because when I asked what I do for a living and when I said I am a dancer it was assumed that I was a stripper and or a Go-Go Dancer and I would either get a look of sudden disapproval or a wink. Neither to me was flattering only because of the judgment being made not because of what I was being judge on. Because if I was a stripper or what ever as I am not breaking any laws moral or other wise who are you to judge me. I’m sure your closet is not skeleton free. If you open the door all kinds of bones once buried would fall out. I actually said that to a guy.


    My point is there are scumbags in every professional some wear: a thong, a suite, a uniform and a surgical mask. Look at the person's character first. Then magical a logical leap!

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    Oct 16, 2007 9:10 PM GMT
    Not really knowing what the hell I'm talking about, but...

    I think there is a huge difference between a go-go dancer and a stripper, hustler, or porn star...

    I don't think I would have a problem with a dancer. I do think I would have a problem with a stripper, hustler, or porn star...

    Yes, it is a subtle distinction.

  • GQjock

    Posts: 11648

    Oct 16, 2007 9:23 PM GMT
    Hey ... if you got the goods to do it?
    Go for it...

    but having a BF that dances? Not too kosher...
    They have to do a bit too much for that 5 dollar bill than I'd want my BF doin...
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    Oct 16, 2007 9:57 PM GMT
    For me, the answer would be no, but not because I lack respect for dancers/strippers. Rather, it's the possibility of an obsessive psycho-fan or a stalker that would cause me concern. I know that not everyone who goes to strip clubs or go-go bars is one, but how can you be sure? I would worry about my partner's safety if he was doing that... and having that kind of worry in a relationship makes it real hard to enjoy it.

    Rocco, I know you've been in the business a long time... how do you avoid that kind of thing? Has your boyfirend/partner (past or present) ever conveyed that fear to you?

    Maybe that's for another thread...

    Whatever.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 16, 2007 10:03 PM GMT
    Man 2 Man - Male Stripper