Why do people find it easier to lie than to tell the truth?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 18, 2007 5:41 AM GMT
    Have you ever been in a position where everyone around you - EVERYONE - was lying?

    I'm in a position right at the moment - overseas - where absolutely no one is who they say they are (I think there are five different competing groups), absolutely everyone is demonstrably lying about the prime subject, and accusing the competition. With the best intelligence in the world, I can't figure out who is in the right.

    The only thing I do know is that there is enough money at stake to buy a not so small country, bribes are flowing like water to everyone, and that I don't believe any of the interested parties wants to help the people the money should really be going to. And EVERYONE is stealing from the locals.

    Why do people find it easier to lie than to tell the truth?

    Not just in big things but even in the tiniest details?
    Don't they have to KNOW that eventually the truth will come out and someone will have to pay?

    I see this all the time - a dozen times a day - on the internet...

    How many times have you made a computer date with a guy and met in person only to find out that they look nothing like their photo's - which have been stolen from somewhere else on the internet?

    How many times have you known an employee to steal from you?

    How many times have you found a cashier who deliberately tries to short change you?

    How many times have you gotten into a taxi in a strange city and they try to charge you three times the legal limit?

    I find it in every culture all over the world - many are much worse than our own actually; In China for example I think it is EXPECTED that a stranger will lie to you rather than tell you the truth.

    My father once told me that you can only trust family that you have grown up with and known for 30 years or longer - and then only if it doesn't involve land or money.

    I am starting to agree.

    God I want to go home to my partner! (and sleep for a week).

    R

    "...Everybody knows that the dice are loaded
    Everybody rolls with their fingers crossed
    Everybody knows that the war is over
    Everybody knows the good guys lost
    Everybody knows the fight was fixed
    The poor stay poor, the rich get rich
    Thats how it goes
    Everybody knows..." - some guy named Lenny


  • Aznraven84

    Posts: 21

    Oct 18, 2007 8:21 AM GMT
    People tend to lie to open possibilities, gain advantage over others, and to make themselves feel better. You basically stated it in your post.
    As upon why? It makes life a lot easier. I mean, you can't tell me that your THE most honest person in the whole entire world. I'm sure you tell white lies every now and again, or just don't say the whole truth about things to which some others would consider a lie, but in technicallity, it was their assumption upon a little fact.
    Also, at times, some people don't mean to lie as well. As the saying goes, "It's in perspectives." Some may see something in a totally different situation from what another believes to be false.
    It's not wrong to lie, but it's not good either. Sometimes, you just can't help it.

    Oh and the scumb bags that lie for money, are people that are greedy or in need. It's sad, but there is a reason they do so, they're not happy with life.

    As for some situations upon the internet meeting, those people just hope that their personalities will carry themselves even though their looks are what they are ashamed of.

    Again, these things are sad, but sometimes it works and many times it doesn't.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 18, 2007 10:35 AM GMT
    People lie from fear. This is almost universally true. It is fear of not getting what they want and it is based on the premise that they are not in charge of their own happiness. Understanding what people are frightened of can sometimes allow you to re-assure them and sometimes get to the truth. If they know their interest is taken care of, they will often start helping you rather than only working for themselves.

    In business situations, most people understand that 20% of a sure thing is better than 100% of pie in the sky.
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    Oct 18, 2007 2:22 PM GMT
    itjock, I know people around me also lie. I have caught them in lies before and they continue to lie or what I call not giving all of the information or leaving out key pieces of the story. I have worked in loss/prevention before and it amazes me how people will justify almost anything to gain the upper-hand in almost any situation. I guess once they justify in their own mind it makes it okay to lie or not tell the whole truth.

    How many of us really puff up a story to make it sound good or intriguing to others? How many of us add or delete information from a story so we look good or the story sounds over the top and we get the attention we need from others because we have such a great story to tell? I like to tell a great story and I am guilty as charged for embellishing from time to time. Is that a character flaw? Do I need to pump up my self esteem for some reason?

    Of course you are going to find liars on the Internet? This is the first time in many people's lives they can be anyone they want to be. The Internet (for now) is anonymous. But, are they lying? If it hurts another person then I agree it's lying. If people are on here just to hurt others then maybe some intense therapy is needed for them. I take it all with a grain of salt. Remember, On the Internet, Nobody Knows You're a Dog. icon_wink.gif

    I truly believe in Karma. I believe the energy you expel from your body/mind/soul will come back to you in the same manner.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 18, 2007 2:27 PM GMT
    As someone who spends most of his time alone, it's a lot easier to come up with a lie to the "how have you been?" question than to tell the truth.
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    Oct 18, 2007 4:44 PM GMT
    Are you sure you're not living in L.A? LMAO And SkyTran are you sure you're not from the South where the art of embellishing a story is an art form? LOL But seriously, I was taught that the only time a lie is justifable is to prevent someone from getting hurt. For example, if someone make a cake that was just awful & they asked how it was, it would be perfectable ok to say it was good. (most of us are not quick enough to say something "never tasted anything quite like it") And if that's the case then it's ok but lying to deceive is plain wrong. C'mon eventually we're going to find out you're not 6', 2" look like a Calvin Klein model and a comodities broker. See: Brad Paisleys "I'm Cooler Onlin"
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    Oct 19, 2007 5:36 PM GMT
    Because too many people demand free information. Business information has monetary value, it shouldn't be free. You should do your own leg work so you get the right information. Free information is never accurate. People who give out free information do it to influence others so they gain something, like any kind of advertising. Demanding free and completely accurate information from everyone shows an entitlement mentality (laziness).

    Think like an economist, don't think like a preacher.
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    Oct 19, 2007 5:48 PM GMT
    Sounds like Iraq.

    Don't confirm or deny it though. Lord knows what would happen to you.

    It's easier to be honest than to lie. Most people know this.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 19, 2007 6:00 PM GMT
    No matter how many people around me lie, I will tell the truth more often than not -- I hold honesty as one of my virtues.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 20, 2007 2:24 AM GMT
    I have found that some people confuse "integrity" as "dedication to the cause" (whatever that may be) rather than to the truth.
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    Oct 20, 2007 2:37 AM GMT
    People lie for various reason, wether it's a cover-up, or to make one feel better. Usually they think there are different degree's of lying and the lowest lie is usually a partial truth. Technical huh?

    I personally believe (Like Teen South Carolina) that a lie is a lie no matter what degree and it explains alot about one's character. Call people on it! It's addictive, and we all know it, but the truth will surface soon and will have a deer in headlights effect, so don't be surprised.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 20, 2007 2:44 AM GMT
    1. Low self-esteem

    2. Miseducation

    3. Zero Integity

    4. No class

    5.Jealousy

    6. Lack of testerone / too much oestrogen

    7. Its just their way of coping after being rejected by Chuckystud.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 20, 2007 3:43 AM GMT
    I have that experience all the time, especially when I have to deal with any form of government. I won't go into any details, because it makes me sick to even remember it.

    Some of these bureaucrats have developed the deux ex machina of lies: when they've been flat caught out, they have a friendly court arbitrarily declare their lies to be "truth."

    My family tends to lie about certain things. I didn't realize how strange it was until I came back from college. They always lie about how much things cost. They usually lie about things that they've done, to make a better story. Since we're supposed to be operating the family farm together, everybody lies about the proportion of work they've done. What really bugs me is when I ask whether someone has done a specific task (e.g. turn on a pump or feed some animals) and they lie about it. I don't care if they haven't, but I need to know, dammit!


    Anyway, lies are just a way to postpone unpleasantness. I guess the only hope is that the shit storm gets delayed until the perpetrator has a chance to get away.
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    Oct 20, 2007 3:55 AM GMT
    Truth is a more valuable currency when those in power (of a Country or of areas of your life - job, family) are virtuous. The more the goal of power holders is self-service rather then self-less leadership and service , the more corrupt it is.

    When those in power are corrupt, truth has no value, so you'd be a fool to expect it.

    I bet if you compared the places where you are lied to the most with the places where you receive the most honesty - you'd find very different leadership. Really, that's why American Presidential elections are so important. The right attitude at the top sets the stage for everything that trickles down. 'The Hammer' in congress, Cheney in the White House - you're asking for corruption and LIES.icon_sad.gif



  • Salubrious

    Posts: 420

    Oct 20, 2007 4:05 AM GMT
    I lie all the time.
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    Oct 20, 2007 4:11 AM GMT
    OHikerReally, that's why American Presidential elections are so important. The right attitude at the top sets the stage for everything that trickles down.


    That's so cute. Don't anybody tell him about Santa Claus.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Oct 20, 2007 4:40 AM GMT
    It could be the local culture. I also feel its part of doing business no matter where you go. In the end, the only information you should trust at all is information you researched and found for yourself.