Do you believe in L O V E ?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 25, 2009 10:29 PM GMT
    Do you?
    Or is it just 'lust' to you?
    Is 'love' short term or long term in your opinion?

    I'm undecided at the moment - my opinion to date is that nothing lasts forever, and that includes love. Although I think its easy to love someone for a lifetime, but not in the same way as being 'in-love' with them... if you get what I mean.
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    Mar 25, 2009 10:31 PM GMT
    no
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    Mar 25, 2009 10:38 PM GMT
    Just my own experience, may or may not apply to others:

    I was in a straight marriage, tried to do the love thing, and failed.

    I came out gay, found a gay partner, and found love like I had never known before, that I never knew could even exist.

    Yes, I believe in love. I believe love is possible with the right two people. Those two people may be straight, or they may be gay, lesbian or bi.

    But is love possible, and do I believe in it? Yes, oh yes! icon_biggrin.gif
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    Mar 25, 2009 10:39 PM GMT
    Yes, most definitely.
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    Mar 25, 2009 10:49 PM GMT
    The Jury is still out on this one.....
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    Mar 25, 2009 10:51 PM GMT
    OMG I found lust with the guy above me..

    charlitos would be proud..
  • baldone

    Posts: 826

    Mar 25, 2009 10:59 PM GMT
    yup....love,marriage/civil unions the whole bit....
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    Mar 25, 2009 11:03 PM GMT
    Y E S
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    Mar 25, 2009 11:03 PM GMT
    YESSSSSSSS
  • dannyboy1101

    Posts: 977

    Mar 25, 2009 11:07 PM GMT
    I have never felt it, but I haven't touched the Eiffel Tower either and I still believe it's there. I think a lot of gays don't know how to love because they possibly don't know how to fully love themselves which I label "Step 1." No. 2 I think that a lot of people throw out the word "love" way too easily. I have never uttered it to anyone romantically, but I do believe that using it will either create fireworks for or will light a cannon aimed at your relationship.
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    Mar 25, 2009 11:36 PM GMT
    It does, and it can make you do silly stuff..
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    Mar 25, 2009 11:50 PM GMT
    Do I believe in the fairy-tale thing where a switch is flipped and you live happily ever after? Nope. But I believe in love that can last a lifetime and that comes again every day when I'm with my partner.

    I don't think that there is only one love for everyone, but that I could fall in love again if my current relationship ended.

    Being in love and having a great relationship are not the same thing. It takes a lot more than love to be in a satisfying relationship.
  • TallGWMvballe...

    Posts: 1925

    Mar 25, 2009 11:53 PM GMT
    Y E S !

    I have had the great fortune to have had several "real love" affairs and cherish each and every one AND really want to find the next AND have it find me!
    I am still very much in love with and love my last boy friend who left me after 3 years.... I was not ready at that time to make the commitment he demanded and so lost out but I STILL love him as much as ever.

    May we ALL find or have love find us.
    Yes it makes you do silly things... but it is the wonderful high level thing in the world.

    Love can be short term and still be valid or long term and make your life more than you ever dared dream was possible.
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    Mar 25, 2009 11:55 PM GMT
    I do believe in love. I'm 18 but theres nothing I'd want more than a long term relationship.

    Every couple or single gay I've met has never offered anything but the invitation to a threesome. I dont know call me old fashioned but constant threesomes in relationships isnt what I consider love with the guy I'm with.
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    Mar 26, 2009 12:10 AM GMT
    I don't believe in LOOOVE. I do believe in Love, the real-world kind that takes work, patience, compromise, a sense of humor, and a willingness to accept that your partner will have faults as well as virtues.
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    Mar 26, 2009 12:13 AM GMT
    gear saidif love bites me in my ass let me know

    I think that's your job, not mine...
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    Mar 26, 2009 12:20 AM GMT
    In fantasy, yes I believe in love. In reality, with other gay men who generally have never developed much emotionally past adolescence and don't have any love to really offer, I haven't seen many guys who are capable of loving and being loved - by the same person - for many years. There is a process that most people go through where you develop skills socially and emotionally where you look at another person and discover qualities that go beyond physical traits - for straight people these have generally been something like would this person be a good spouse, a good parent, a good member of an extended family, etc. Because so much of our lives are still secret, and since a lot of our families want nothing to do with our sexual/relationship lives, there hasn't been much personal development there. I've seen some, but not much. I see a lot of awkwardness where, when one guy gets too close, the other gets scared and leaves without saying he's leaving, and never calls again. It's the leave or be left scenario - guys like that are not ready to love and surely not ready to be in relationships.

    I think a lot of us, out of frustration (me, being one of them since I've waited since 1996 for much of anything to happen) daydream about what we'd love to experience in life, which is fine. But it also can be a distraction from a reality that sucks because you already know most of the guys within the gay selection pool, have dealt with guys who still have years to go before they're ready for something serious, and you're kind of stuck - where do you go from here? I'm tired of these things that last 3 months or 6 months or maybe a year. At this point I would rather have nothing that bad quality and guys who are going to leave once the 'new' wears off.
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    Mar 26, 2009 12:22 AM GMT
    Love is something that comes when you least expect it. Unfortunately, many people think that lust is the start of love. From what I've seen through the years, you can't find love. It just pops up. And you can choose either to let it grow or let it die. That's just my view though. There really is no solid definition to what love is. It varies with everyone.

    I'm 22 years old and right now I should be enjoying my single life. But I'm not at all. I feel half full because I want someone to care for. Day to day I wonder when my single life will be over. Many nights I've fallen asleep with tears in my eyes, tired of being alone so much with no one to call my own. I'm waiting for love to come my way and it's so hard. I know it's coming, but the wait will be long and difficult indeed. But in the end, I'll have the love that I've been waiting for for so long icon_smile.gif
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    Mar 26, 2009 12:25 AM GMT
    Gentlemen, it's just an illusion!
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    Mar 26, 2009 12:26 AM GMT
    love is not something to believe in, it is something to feel, to live, to let your spirit and soul be touched by. like happiness. or jealousy. or boredom. or awe.

    i love my friends and family with my whole being. but because of things that have happened in my past, i will never love "the one" forever and forever like in a disney movie.

    it exists, but in different forms for different people. i choose not to let it exist in a certain form in my life, and i believe that i am better for it.

  • TallGWMvballe...

    Posts: 1925

    Mar 26, 2009 12:27 AM GMT
    WOW Duluth, I am sorry to see you are so jaded and have such a negative view of other gay men.
    In my years of being a gay man I have seen some (mostly guys under 35) that are immature in the ways you describe but also have been encourage by the many that are willing an able to get by that and become wonderful lovers.
    I just hope YOU are not like those you describe .... become the person you admire and hope to find yourself and you will attract those that you want.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Mar 26, 2009 12:32 AM GMT
    Love is just a temporary chemical imbalance in your brain caused by a combination visual, tactile, or auditory stimuli
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    Mar 26, 2009 12:54 AM GMT
    Love is a seed, something within yourself that you can only give away.
  • DCEric

    Posts: 3713

    Mar 26, 2009 12:57 AM GMT
    lilTanker saidno


    lilTanker is back!!!!

    /and yes I do believe, long term. My parents are what I can only hope to be.
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    Mar 26, 2009 1:15 AM GMT
    L is for the way you look at me...
    O is ..... you know the rest

    so yes icon_biggrin.gif