Dating a guy that doesn't work out

  • sportsjockla

    Posts: 498

    Mar 31, 2009 3:49 AM GMT
    If you spend a lot of time in the gym, would you date a guy that doesn't work out? I was seeing a guy a few months back that didn't work out. I tried to get him to go, but he made excuses not to go. I liked him a lot, but sex was "Blah".
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 3:53 AM GMT
    They make gays who don't work out?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 3:56 AM GMT
    so um.. you took a guy that wasn't interested in the gym and tried to change him to suit you......

    Yeah thats gonna work awesome like..
  • sportsjockla

    Posts: 498

    Mar 31, 2009 4:15 AM GMT
    No, I didn't try to change him. He said in the beginning he wanted me to train him and stuff. He just kept coming up with excuses not to work out. I trained him once and his form was all over the place.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 4:28 AM GMT
    Here is my philosophy on that. I am a huge supporter of working out and exercising for your health....its not just for vanity. I personally have dated a couple of guys who don't work out and I truthfully am not completely bothered by it. Life is not all about vanity. On the other hand!......I am a firm believer of "how you treat your exterior is a reflection of how you feel about yourself internally."
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 4:35 AM GMT

    I don't see how working out is suddenly supposed to make a guy I am seeing better. There had to have been more reasons for breaking it off with this guy than just he didn't work out.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 4:42 AM GMT
    I would love to work out if I found the time. It's spring semester for me. I'm involved in the two biggest clubs on my campus and trying to get a 3.0 to stay in my major. I'm an American Sign Language major so I get no time to myself, plus I have to be in the ASL club being as it's for my major. I'm also part of Colleges Against Cancer (CAC) and our Relay for Life walk is coming up on April 17th and 18th. So I'm busy with getting that planned. I am chair of Team Captains, making sure they have no problems in getting things done with there teams. I'm invovled with CAC because I have family,neighbors and close friends affected by Cancer. And I'm Captain for the ASL Club team for the Relay walk. And I also work for the school so I can have money to live 2hrs away from home. So yeah working out is not at the top of my list right now. And I know I have to change my profile about that as well.
  • ROYCE13

    Posts: 315

    Mar 31, 2009 5:03 AM GMT
    There are guys who do not work out you are good in bed. FYI
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 5:56 AM GMT
    I dated a guy that didn't work out. He wasn't overweight or anything. He was naturally lean. He didn't have much interest in the gym or any outdoor activity, other than walking. I knew this from the beginning, and I had no intent on changing him.

    So while I was at the gym, he would be running errands or doing stuff around the house. It would have been nice to spend that time together. But oh well.

    And yeah, having some upper body strength is quite helpful in certain situations. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 6:09 AM GMT
    My BF doesn't really work out. He does sometimes, but it's not something regular. But, honestly, it doesn't bother me too much. I wish he would, if for no other reason than to make himself feel better. We're both in IT, and I know - from my experiences managing an HD and as a gamer - how crappy you generally feel spending so many hours in the same position in front of a screen.

    But it's his choice. I figure if he wants it bad enough, he'll do it. If ever I start worrying about his health, or if he really starts putting on pounds, I'll feel myself obligated to say something as his BF. But he's a long way from that, I think. icon_smile.gif

    (Oh, and it'd be nice to have someone to go to the gym with me. But, *sigh*, wishful thinking... icon_sad.gif )
  • nv7_

    Posts: 1453

    Mar 31, 2009 6:17 AM GMT
    Yeah I'd date a guy who doesn't work out as long as I was attracted to him. I've met guys who spend a lot of time in the gym, etc, yet they don't they don't have the bodies you'd think they'd have considering the amount of time (they say) they spend at the gym. icon_neutral.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 6:51 AM GMT
    you also have to realize that you can't change someone, they would have to want it themselves, and even if they wanted it, you would have to assess how bad, so you have to know what you are getting into before you sign on (but yes, i would date someone who didnt go to the gym if i found them attractive)
  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Mar 31, 2009 6:54 AM GMT
    Working out ?
    For whatever reason, you've got to WANT to do it.
    Obviously, your friend didn't want to do it.
    BTW, I've only had one boyfriend who worked out.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 7:09 AM GMT
    it is funy how after a few answer everybody answers all but the original question!! lol

    i would date a guy that doesnt work out but most have a killer body and keep it that way. either working out or not.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 7:18 AM GMT
    My ex would always be joining a gym next month and kept a sit up bench do a couple of crunchs and call me for praise....

    Another ex was really good and loosing weight when I was there to set the example and be healthy alongside him but after we broke up quickly went back to his old ways, and was constantly trying to get me to eat junk so he could

    After those two I just wanted someone to care enough about both me and himself to want to stay in shape
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 7:25 AM GMT
    I try to take good care of myself - weights, swimming laps, cycling, tennis, racquet ball, running...... and most any guy I ever dated did some or all of these activities too. I tried once to date a guy who wouldn't go near a gym - and although he had good qualities - his lack of concern for his health and appearance over time made him less attractive to me. I never tried to change him, but I made some reasonable suggestions. I did a lot of work to keep myself attractive for him - but he evidently did not respect me enough to do the same for me. So - no, I don't think I'll date anyone in the future who refuses to work out in some way. Soft, couch potatos don't turn me on - they're just not my thing - sorry.
  • Sayrnas

    Posts: 847

    Mar 31, 2009 10:55 AM GMT
    I've had something similar to you AMT87;

    I have my range of things i'll eat or drink...I wasn't eating what I should have. I am now damnit!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 12:04 PM GMT
    Yeah. I could date a guy who didn't work out so long as he stay attractive and doesn't fall off the deep end to the point where the attraction is lost. I'll keep it real and say that 90 percent of the time it's a physical thing. So long as he continues to stay attractive in a way that I find appealing without having to work out then it's all gravey.
  • Mikeylikesit

    Posts: 1021

    Mar 31, 2009 1:04 PM GMT
    I dated a guy that did not work out. I think everyone has their own likes and dis-likes, Thats whats make a relationship exciting. If you are too similar, I think it will make it very boring. People need toi have there differances...icon_biggrin.gif
  • CAtoFL

    Posts: 834

    Mar 31, 2009 1:27 PM GMT
    AMT87 saidMy ex would always be joining a gym next month and kept a sit up bench do a couple of crunchs and call me for praise....


    I think AMT's experience is worse than dating someone who doesn't work out.

    The guys who are always starting 'next month' or are perpetually postponing their workout goals are the ones who are just misleading themselves. That's worse than guys who just aren't concerned with working out.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Mar 31, 2009 1:35 PM GMT
    The sex is blah? You think it would be better if he went to the gym?

    I see nothing wrong with someone not going to the gym, but I do think it's important to be active - be it running, biking, walking, sports, etc. Some people just find the gym setting boring and/or off-putting.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 1:37 PM GMT
    sportsjockla saidIf you spend a lot of time in the gym, would you date a guy that doesn't work out? I was seeing a guy a few months back that didn't work out. I tried to get him to go, but he made excuses not to go. I liked him a lot, but sex was "Blah".


    Absolutelyicon_exclaim.gif Do you think working out is the be all end all of existence?
    As long as he can see his feet over his stomach, what's the problem?

    My gawwwwwwwwwwwwd manicon_exclaim.gificon_exclaim.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 1:42 PM GMT
    Derrick8 saidHere is my philosophy on that. I am a huge supporter of working out and exercising for your health....its not just for vanity. I personally have dated a couple of guys who don't work out and I truthfully am not completely bothered by it. Life is not all about vanity. On the other hand!......I am a firm believer of "how you treat your exterior is a reflection of how you feel about yourself internally."


    LOL - this is one of the funniest things I've seen written here

    Eh so those guys who live by chemistry and dysmorphs their bodies into some gawwwdddd awful grotesque shapes are supposed to be saying what exactlyicon_question.gif

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 1:45 PM GMT
    Timberoo saidThe sex is blah? You think it would be better if he went to the gym?

    I see nothing wrong with someone not going to the gym, but I do think it's important to be active - be it running, biking, walking, sports, etc. Some people just find the gym setting boring and/or off-putting.


    Well for the OP it would be. He seems to have a muscle fetishicon_exclaim.gif But that's his thing. To each his ownicon_exclaim.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Mar 31, 2009 1:48 PM GMT

    If he does that's fine, but why date a non muscular guy and then trash him on the net? There is more to this story.