FORUMS > HIV/AIDS Forum Rules

so can you get hiv from unprotected oral sex? This might be a dumb question, so I guess I'm looking for someone more experienced than myself to answer. I know you can obviously get other std's, but I heard somewhere that the chance of getting HIV is basically zero. So should I feel safe with unprotected oral sex? do you do it, and if so do you worry about it?

NO.
You'll hear all he ridiculous warnings about no sex after you flossed your teeth, no sex after you had your teeth cleaned at the dentist, and on and on.
NO.
The answer is, NO.
There has been not one proven case of transmission of HIV through oral sex.

Webster666 saidNO.
You'll hear all he ridiculous warnings about no sex after you flossed your teeth, no sex after you had your teeth cleaned at the dentist, and on and on.
NO.
The answer is, NO.
There has been not one proven case of transmission of HIV through oral sex.

Really??? There are several RJ' ers that are hiv + via oral sex. Educate yourself via their wisdom and knowledge (among the thousands of other safe sex guidelines/sites) before making such an ignorant statement. Granted oral is less risky but it is not 100% safe.

I wonder why several AIDS agencies for which I volunteer caution about the risks of oral sex? What do you know that they don't?

It certainly seems plausible that mouth sores and bleeding gums could be entry points for the virus, when you've got a mouthful of cum. But if you want to take that chance, that's your business...

My friend that hardly do any anal sex , get infected thru oral sex. I was lucky not to get infected despite performing bj to so many guys. I learn my lesson, as unlikely as it is, I am rolling a condom on every dick I gonna put my mouth in.

Webster666 saidNO.
You'll hear all he ridiculous warnings about no sex after you flossed your teeth, no sex after you had your teeth cleaned at the dentist, and on and on.
NO.
The answer is, NO.
There has been not one proven case of transmission of HIV through oral sex.

I don't know how it can be proven or disproved.

If you can get oral chlamydia or syphilis in the mouth or oral herpes it seems that HIV would be possible too. ESPECIALLY if you already have a sore in your mouth due to a syphilis infection.

bostudent87 said so can you get hiv from unprotected oral sex? This might be a dumb question, so I guess I'm looking for someone more experienced than myself to answer. I know you can obviously get other std's, but I heard somewhere that the chance of getting HIV is basically zero. So should I feel safe with unprotected oral sex? do you do it, and if so do you worry about it?

Very unlikely, but possible. Of course, if fluids are introduced, chances go up. Saliva breaks down HIV. You need a cut in your mouth, direct contact with fluids, etc:

http://www.sfaf.org/aids101/sexual.html#oral

Recent advice from my clinic is that it is possible, but extremely rare and not worth worrying about.

From the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention:

"Yes, it is possible for either partner to become infected with HIV through performing or receiving oral sex..."

http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/resources/qa/qa19.htm

It's hard to prove that it happens because everyone sucks dick. However, clear thinking would show, because HIV spreads via body fluids, dick juice + canker sores is pretty close to taking a load in an open wound.

Basically, if you're questioning the cleanliness of the shaft, throw a rubber on it and problem solved. Or, you can be a nag and make him get the full battery of tests before you go there. Obviously, if it smells or looks bad, you might wanna steer clear altogether and send him packing.

A typical government answer. "Yes, it is possible...."

More helpful would be statistics. How many cases of HIV were as a result of exclusively oral sex. Was it 2 or 2 million? This will then give the reader the basis for making a sound rational decision - to assess risk - and his willingness to take it. We take conscious and sometime necessary risks every day - for example when you drive a car - "it is possible" you can be struck and killed by another driver. Does that mean you don't drive? No. Because the statistical likelihood is remote. It is possible the next flight you are on can hit a flock of birds and crash. The statistical likelihood of that occurring is more remote than getting struck by lightning - twice.

Does anyone know and can thus share some real useful statistics so this young man can make an adult decision rather than one based on scare tactics or instincts, or bias?

BTW - I commend you for asking the question.

Unlikely, but possible. If you're going to do it do, do it with caution. Make sure your overall oral health is good before you do it. I'm not encouraging anyone to do it, but since people will do it anyways, try not to be extra dumb about it.

As a side note, I'm pos. I was in a relationship with a neg guy for over a year and he probably blew me at least once a day, sometimes more. I never came in his mouth, I know that's what you're wondering. I was initially against it, but he insisted and it seemed to make him very happy. He remains neg to this day. Dumb luck or proof that it's very hard to catch that way? I don't know.

It is considered possible but highly unlikely. the problem being that it has never been proven. those that say they caught it through oral sex are generally ashamed to admit they were having unprotected anal sex, and it is very hard to find populations to study that do not engage in anal sex so proving that oral sex can / cannot transmit HIV is near impossible.

You also have the internet to provide you more information if you need it.

This isn't a dumb question but Google would provide you tons of information of not only HIV but other STDS as well.

As G.I. Joe said,

"Knowing is half the battle."

thanks for your information, and yes, i have looked online, only to find out what everyone here is saying: it is possible, but very unlikely; i guess i just wanted to know what other people did so i could have a sense of what the majority does and feels safe doing

If the guy pre-cums dont do it. Just jack him off at the end.

It's a shame Webster's inaccurate post is the first response.

The consensus is yes, it's possible, even thought it's lower risk than other activities.

GuerrillaSodomite saidUnlikely, but possible. If you're going to do it do, it with caution. Make sure your overall oral health is good before you do it. I'm not encouraging anyone to do it, but since people will do it anyways, try not to be extra dumb about it.

As a side note, I'm pos. I was in a relationship with a neg guy for over a year and he probably blew me at least once a day, sometimes more. I never came in his mouth, I know that's what you're wondering. I was initially against it, but he insisted and it seemed to make him very happy. He remains neg to this day. Dumb luck or proof that it's very hard to catch that way? I don't know.

Quoting GuerillaSodomite, it's highly unlikely but possible. According to the research I've done on the topic working in the DIS field there have only been four documented and confirmed cases of HIV transmission due to oral sex. It's entirely likely that those infected had some form of open sore or wounds in their mouth at the time which contributed to infection.

Still, if you're worried there's nothing wrong with slapping on a rubber before going down on someone. When in doubt...

A good resource to go to for information on modes of transmission is http://www.thebody.com/sitemap.html or http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/

CDC says yes, but, most folks say no.

Well, think about it: can you get other diseases from oral sex, receiving or giving? Yes. I know more than one person who is now HIV positive and says they must've gotten from oral sex.

sixxfive said Granted oral is less risky but it is not 100% safe.

This is true.

seanp7 saidIt's a shame Webster's inaccurate post is the first response.

The consensus is yes, it's possible, even thought it's lower risk than other activities.

True! The rest are in denial.

Yes. I am one. How do I know? Trust me I know from my sexual history. Never liked being a bottom, never bottomed without condoms, and very rarely did it. Never let a guy ejaculate in my mouth. Tested positive in 1995. You figure it out.

Remember that pre-cum has as much concentration of the virus as cum so it is possible. All the pre-cum needs to do is find its' way into the bloodstream via a cut or sore in the mouth. The guy does not have to ejaculate in your mouth.

I was a safer sex poster boy for years and still got it. Maybe part of my problem was complacency. The first time I took the HIV test, the tester asked me what I did in bed and when I told him, he said "there is virtually no way you can get HIV you are very safe." Well whatever.

Webster666 saidNO.
You'll hear all he ridiculous warnings about no sex after you flossed your teeth, no sex after you had your teeth cleaned at the dentist, and on and on.
NO.
The answer is, NO.
There has been not one proven case of transmission of HIV through oral sex.

Actually, while the cases are criticized, there are 5 "proven" cases of HIV through oral sex.

DO NOT brush your teeth or floss before sex. Your gum's will have little tears that will make you more susceptible.

DO NOT forget to take care of your teeth. If you have an open sore or wound from not brushing properly you will have a greater chance of contraction.

NEVER swallow.

I'm with SurrealLife. I played safe and still contracted it and I believe it was because of my teeth.

I've known two people to claim to have contracted HIV from oral sex. But then as they referenced their story over and over again it came out that they didn't use a condom and were simply too ashamed to admit to it.

For whatever reason they thought it was less shameful to have contracted HIV from oral sex instead of having anal sex without a condom. This logic I don't understand. It's not like it changes anything.

muchmorethanmuscle saidI've known two people to claim to have contracted HIV from oral sex. But then as they referenced their story over and over again it came out that they didn't use a condom and were simply too ashamed to admit to it.

For whatever reason they thought it was less shameful to have contracted HIV from oral sex instead of having anal sex without a condom. This logic I don't understand. It's not like it changes anything.

Thing is they may have still have got it from oral sex. That is the problem with the data. If a guy has unprotected anal sex once, it is assumed he got it from that one occurrence. Unless one knows whether the other guy was HIV+ there is no way to know for sure if that incident led to the infection.

Some HIV researchers suspect unprotected oral is more risky then originally thought. But it is very difficult to prove one way or the other. I know that in my situation it was highly unlikely that I contracted it from anal sex. Never had unprotected anal, and only engaged in it two or three times before testing positive. As for oral sex, I never insisted on protection and engaged in it many times over 9 years.

chuckystud saidCDC says yes, but, most folks say no.

hmmmm let's see.

I could trust my life with "most folks" or the CDC.

I think I'll stick with the MDs and PhDs at the CDC.

the last time i got tested the guy told me that its highly unlikely that you will get it from oral sex. HIV cant survive in the mouth long enough to make it into the bloodstream. He works for the department of public health so i trust him. however, I also know that if you have bleeding gums it creates a pathway. Thats if the virus doesn't get the shit kicked out of it by your saliva. For those of you that are swearing off bjs you might want to stop kissing as well cuz if this is all true and both guys floss before the date, couldn't you catch it from that as well. Also you shouldnt compare some of these other STD or rather STIs to hiv. they have different modes of transmission, some of which are just skin contact.

ajasu08 saidthe last time i got tested the guy told me that its highly unlikely that you will get it from oral sex. HIV cant survive in the mouth long enough to make it into the bloodstream. He works for the department of public health so i trust him. however, I also know that if you have bleeding gums it creates a pathway. Thats if the virus doesn't get the shit kicked out of it by your saliva. For those of you that are swearing off bjs you might want to stop kissing as well cuz if this is all true and both guys floss before the date, couldn't you catch it from that as well. Also you shouldnt compare some of these other STD or rather STIs to hiv. they have different modes of transmission, some of which are just skin contact.

That guy told you you can get HIV from oral sex. You wrote it in your first sentence.

He did say it was highly unlikely though. BUT you can still get it. Is unprotected oral worth the risk? That is for you and your partner to decide.

As for the kissing comment...I had to laugh a little. Over ten years ago I was taught that HIV cannot be passed throguh kissing. I believe that hasn't changed. Your logic is flawed Becasue "A + B = C does not mean A + C = B"

The kissing comment needs to be backed by science and statistics--it has yet to be done.

ajasu08 saidthe last time i got tested the guy told me that its highly unlikely that you will get it from oral sex. HIV cant survive in the mouth long enough to make it into the bloodstream. He works for the department of public health so i trust him. however, I also know that if you have bleeding gums it creates a pathway. Thats if the virus doesn't get the shit kicked out of it by your saliva. For those of you that are swearing off bjs you might want to stop kissing as well cuz if this is all true and both guys floss before the date, couldn't you catch it from that as well. Also you shouldnt compare some of these other STD or rather STIs to hiv. they have different modes of transmission, some of which are just skin contact.

I have to agree totally with this posting! Odd that you are concerned about hiv transmission thru oral sex but ignore other bug-a-boos such as hepetitus C, which is probably way more likely to pass thru oral sex than hiv. And, after 7 to 15 years or so can kill you just as dead...

"Paranoia-big destroyer!"

I was semi sarcastic in my comment about kissing but at the same time im sure your class didnt consider the fact that its possible for blood to be in one or both of the mouths of the guys. I dont think my logic is flawed. It is also "highly unlikely" that your going to get struck by lightning yet sometimes you still go out in the rain right? In no way am i condoning unprotected sex. its more of the principle of living your life in fear to a certain extent. Some guys love feeling cock in there months without the barrier of a condom. Would you stop doing something you love cuz of the "highly unlikely" risk? Ie by having pics up and questionable comments on sites such as myspace, facebook, or even realjock you run the risk of future employers finding it and in turn discrediting you in some way. Risk is a part of life. Granted you not gettin a jock cuz your showing your cock is not life or death by you get my drift.

ajasu08 saidI was semi sarcastic in my comment about kissing but at the same time im sure your class didnt consider the fact that its possible for blood to be in one or both of the mouths of the guys. I dont think my logic is flawed. It is also "highly unlikely" that your going to get struck by lightning yet sometimes you still go out in the rain right? In no way am i condoning unprotected sex. its more of the principle of living your life in fear to a certain extent. Some guys love feeling cock in there months without the barrier of a condom. Would you stop doing something you love cuz of the "highly unlikely" risk? Ie by having pics up and questionable comments on sites such as myspace, facebook, or even realjock you run the risk of future employers finding it and in turn discrediting you in some way. Risk is a part of life. Granted you not gettin a jock cuz your showing your cock is not life or death by you get my drift.

My beef wasn't about unprotected sex

I actually once wrote a thread about what's the point of having a life parnter who you love and trust, yet do not trust to have unprotected sex? My point was--why have partners if you can't trust them 100%?

What I was concerned about is using mis information on hear. (not necessarily you.) Will I have oral sex with a condom? No. But I probably won't have random sex either. My future bf and I would get tested. Still there is risk yes, but you seem to understand there is unnecessary risk in all life.

My go by the facts from the professionals--that was my piont. Then I use that info to make my own life choices--you should, and probably do the same.

Hepatitis C does not seem to be a risk for oral sex ... unless it is bloody oral sex.

http://www.cdc.gov/hepatitis/C/cFAQ.htm#transmission

It seems like the risk for Hepatitis B is much greater, and it is possible (although unlikely) for Hep B to become a chronic condition and shorten your life.

http://www.cdc.gov/hepatitis/B/bFAQ.htm#transmission

B is spread through semen as well as blood, while C is spread only through blood.

I like this chart:

http://www.sfcityclinic.org/stdbasics/stdchart.asp

i understand where your coming from and im not the one to have unprotected sex myself. Just shining light on the fact that theres risk in gettin hiv just like there risk of something going wrong while scuba diving. The problem that we gays face is that there social stigma surrounding hiv or any STI for that matter. Whats funny to me is that HIV globally is not primarily transfered by gay men and sex, but more so by drug use and prostitution. Yet gays come to mind always when HIV is mentioned here in the states. It just so happens that the anus absorbs more substances than the vagina hence why its passed so easily with in the gay community. the vag strikes again

ajasu08 saidIt just so happens that the anus absorbs more substances than the vagina hence why its passed so easily with in the gay community. the vag strikes again

Anal sex is more likely to transfer HIV, however not because the rectal epithelium is more absorptive. It is actually because the rectum is not designed for having things shoved in and out and therefore forms many very small tears every time you have anal sex (even with enough lube). These tears = open wounds through which the virus can enter your bloodstream. The undamaged lining of the rectum is actually bacteria and virus-proof. If it weren't you'd be dead from fecal bacteria entering your bloodstream.

Also, with kissing, unless you're bleeding PROFUSELY from your mouth there is never going to be enough blood to transfer HIV even if both of you have canker sores. Unless maybe you directly rub the sores on eachother, but that would really require some talent...

and if you're making out while bleeding visibly from your mouth, you're kind of weird...

SockMonkey saidHepatitis C does not seem to be a risk for oral sex ... unless it is bloody oral sex.

http://www.cdc.gov/hepatitis/C/cFAQ.htm#transmission

It seems like the risk for Hepatitis B is much greater, and it is possible (although unlikely) for Hep B to become a chronic condition and shorten your life.

http://www.cdc.gov/hepatitis/B/bFAQ.htm#transmission

B is spread through semen as well as blood, while C is spread only through blood.

I like this chart:

http://www.sfcityclinic.org/stdbasics/stdchart.asp

I think bloody oral would probably creat a risk for many things. HIV is a fragile virus that dies readly when exposed to air. Hep C is a very hardy virus and not only remains liable when exposed to air, it remains liable for quite awhile(on tooth brushes, razors, dried blood). Thre are also no vaccines yet for Hep C. Hep A and B have vaccines that are/should be considered by anyone.
For myself, I would certainly not engage in anything oral after, say, having a tooth extracted, or taking a knee/elbow to the jaw when training. That would include kissing or even sharing a bowl of ice cream...

rankoutsider said

SockMonkey saidHepatitis C does not seem to be a risk for oral sex ... unless it is bloody oral sex.

http://www.cdc.gov/hepatitis/C/cFAQ.htm#transmission

It seems like the risk for Hepatitis B is much greater, and it is possible (although unlikely) for Hep B to become a chronic condition and shorten your life.

http://www.cdc.gov/hepatitis/B/bFAQ.htm#transmission

B is spread through semen as well as blood, while C is spread only through blood.

I like this chart:

http://www.sfcityclinic.org/stdbasics/stdchart.asp

I think bloody oral would probably creat a risk for many things. HIV is a fragile virus that dies readly when exposed to air. Hep C is a very hardy virus and not only remains liable when exposed to air, it remains liable for quite awhile(on tooth brushes, razors, dried blood). Thre are also no vaccines yet for Hep C. Hep A and B have vaccines that are/should be considered by anyone.
For myself, I would certainly not engage in anything oral after, say, having a tooth extracted, or taking a knee/elbow to the jaw when training. That would include kissing or even sharing a bowl of ice cream...

yes especially if you are into rimming

all apologies..used "liable" and should have been "viable". But then, if you have oral sex with blood dripping out it might be YOU who becomes liable!

did a bit more reasearch

"Previously, it was thought that anal intercourse transmitted HIV infection because, during anal intercourse, the penis opened bleeding wounds inside the receptive partner's anus. These bleeding wounds were thought to be the doorway by which HIV directly entered the bloodstream to reach and infect T4-cells.

Now, it appears that the presence of bleeding wounds in the anus is not necessary for HIV transmission to take place. Macrophages are present, roving over the surfaces of the anus. HIV may infect these macrophages directly. Also, HIV is probably able to cross the mucous membrane and enter the tiny blood vessels inside. No damage to the wall of the anus may be necessary for HIV transmission to take place. According to a statistical study, rectal douching after anal intercourse increases the risk of HIV infection."

http://www.aproposinc.com/hap/catch.htm


So technically its not more absorbent but the presents of macrophages makes it possible with out tearing.

Remember my whole kissing thing was suppose to show that its possible but "highley unlikely" just like getting it from oral sex. which is the topic at hand

growingbig saidDO NOT brush your teeth or floss before sex. Your gum's will have little tears that will make you more susceptible.

DO NOT forget to take care of your teeth. If you have an open sore or wound from not brushing properly you will have a greater chance of contraction.

NEVER swallow.

I'm with SurrealLife. I played safe and still contracted it and I believe it was because of my teeth.

actually, the clinic i got tested at, when i asked these questions out of curiosity, said that (as Sebastian but it best) its almost impossible to get it from oral sex unless you have open sores in the mouth, and furthermore (in response to growingbig), swallowing is BETTER than otherwise because the stomach acid instantly kills the virus if it's present. not swallowing (spitting it out) keeps more of it in the mouth and for longer, where you're more susceptible.

i'm sorry, im never giving head to a condom. but then i don't give head to random strangers, so as long as i have the requisite trust i'd need to engage in oral sex, i'm content to take this risk, small as it is.

czarodziej said

growingbig saidDO NOT brush your teeth or floss before sex. Your gum's will have little tears that will make you more susceptible.

DO NOT forget to take care of your teeth. If you have an open sore or wound from not brushing properly you will have a greater chance of contraction.

NEVER swallow.

I'm with SurrealLife. I played safe and still contracted it and I believe it was because of my teeth.

actually, the clinic i got tested at, when i asked these questions out of curiosity, said that (as Sebastian but it best) its almost impossible to get it from oral sex unless you have open sores in the mouth, and furthermore (in response to growingbig), swallowing is BETTER than otherwise because the stomach acid instantly kills the virus if it's present. not swallowing (spitting it out) keeps more of it in the mouth and for longer, where you're more susceptible.

i'm sorry, im never giving head to a condom. but then i don't give head to random strangers, so as long as i have the requisite trust i'd need to engage in oral sex, i'm content to take this risk, small as it is.

I was told this at a clinic as well, about swallowing, and I've never been more happier swallowing!

ajasu08 saiddid a bit more reasearch

"Previously, it was thought that anal intercourse transmitted HIV infection because, during anal intercourse, the penis opened bleeding wounds inside the receptive partner's anus. These bleeding wounds were thought to be the doorway by which HIV directly entered the bloodstream to reach and infect T4-cells.

Now, it appears that the presence of bleeding wounds in the anus is not necessary for HIV transmission to take place. Macrophages are present, roving over the surfaces of the anus. HIV may infect these macrophages directly. Also, HIV is probably able to cross the mucous membrane and enter the tiny blood vessels inside. No damage to the wall of the anus may be necessary for HIV transmission to take place. According to a statistical study, rectal douching after anal intercourse increases the risk of HIV infection."

http://www.aproposinc.com/hap/catch.htm


So technically its not more absorbent but the presents of macrophages makes it possible with out tearing.

Remember my whole kissing thing was suppose to show that its possible but "highley unlikely" just like getting it from oral sex. which is the topic at hand

Hmmm, interesting theory. I'll have to look into that some more. I've never heard about it. Thanks for the info!

Congrats to the guys on here who are educated on HIV, and how it can be transmitted.

It has been said here, the answer is so minimal that there are NO known cases. NONE. ZERO

As a "precaution" its advised not to have oral with a mouth sore or dental work. As my doctor said to me... just use your brain!

To those on here that have other opinions, remember, they are opinions NOT fact. Please do us all a favor. When it comes to something as serious as this question, don't give an opinion, give FACTS only.

For those tired of "opinions" and want facts, here is a link to medical study done last year. Very important, and great information:

http://aidsmap.com/en/news/4E9D555B-18FB-4D56-B912-2C28AFCCD36B.asp

Bottom line... Yes... safe, unless you just had dental work etc...

You can get HIV through oral sex, eventhough your chances are pretty small.

As far as kissing goes, the viral load in saliva is not enough to pass on infection. It is not like semen.

For those posters who said you CAN NOT contract HIV through unprotected oral sex, you are WRONG!, but there is promising research that has come out.

Published in the current issue of The Advocate in the health section, an article appears by Dr. Frank Spinelli. He is also the author of the Advocate Gay Men's Guide to Health and Wellness. You can also email him with medical questions to health@advocate.com

The article is titled Oral Sex and HIV. Here is the info. If you have this issue, it is on page 36.:

"There was a fascinating study that came out of Sweden recently. Researchers looked at 25 HIV negative men in serodiscordant relationships and found after repeated unprotected oral sex with their HIV positive partners, 13 of the men developed neutralizing antibodies in their saliva, protecting them from contracting the disease orally. If such antibodies in the saliva, they could provide a first-line host defense against infection. And if repeated exposure has the potential to strengthen the immune response, this might explain why the rate of HIV transmission through oral sex is low, even in serodiscordant couples. This doesn't. however, negate the fact that HIV can be contracted through unprotected oral sex."

This explains why Guerillasodomite's ex didn't contract it. However, as the article states, only 13 of the 25 developed the antibodies. 12 did not. Bottom line is, while categorized as highly unlikely to contract, you can still contract HIV through unprotected oral sex. The CDC confirms these finding.

This is probably one of the best threads I have viewed and participated in. It is great to see us educating and looking out for each other. This is the only way we will be able to insured our needs are met, by helping each other and for some of us, giving a voice to those who can't.

The most unlikely of things usually tend to be the most frequent.

Yes. You can get HIV through oral sex. It isn't the most common way but it still happens. Anything dealing with bodily fluids (saliva, blood, sperm) with an opening like a cut in mouth or anywhere else on the body has potential of contamination.

All one needs is a little common sense and to practice safety.

YES

Hard? Yes? Impossible? No.

I love all the guys that say no. Ask them, would you give a blowjob and swallow with a guy that was HIV+ If, so, more power to them. They stick by their convictions. More power to them.

ErikTaurean said

This explains why Guerillasodomite's ex didn't contract it. However, as the article states, only 13 of the 25 developed the antibodies. 12 did not. Bottom line is, while categorized as highly unlikely to contract, you can still contract HIV through unprotected oral sex. The CDC confirms these finding.

.

So what happened to the other 12? Did they get HIV? There are so many potential confounds in this study.



For the comment about its better to swallow than to spit, why not just have the guy cum on your chest or something? Although you still run the risk of coming into contact through pre cum.

Wont be swallowing anytime soon. Never have. takes icky to me.

czarodziej said

growingbig saidDO NOT brush your teeth or floss before sex. Your gum's will have little tears that will make you more susceptible.

DO NOT forget to take care of your teeth. If you have an open sore or wound from not brushing properly you will have a greater chance of contraction.

NEVER swallow.

I'm with SurrealLife. I played safe and still contracted it and I believe it was because of my teeth.

actually, the clinic i got tested at, when i asked these questions out of curiosity, said that (as Sebastian but it best) its almost impossible to get it from oral sex unless you have open sores in the mouth, and furthermore (in response to growingbig), swallowing is BETTER than otherwise because the stomach acid instantly kills the virus if it's present. not swallowing (spitting it out) keeps more of it in the mouth and for longer, where you're more susceptible.

i'm sorry, im never giving head to a condom. but then i don't give head to random strangers, so as long as i have the requisite trust i'd need to engage in oral sex, i'm content to take this risk, small as it is.

Well the first two I mentioned were told to me by a center that specializes in HIV care and a doctor. About the swallowing... why would you even want to get it in your mouth? If you do spit and use some mouthwash.

Speak with your doctor in complete confidentiality and get tested at that same visit, because you never can be too self assured that just because one virus, in one person, somewhere else, at some other time, didn't infect some other Johnny Cocksucker you won't get infected. Every virus HIV/AIDS, Ebola, Cold/Flu or otherwise mutates. That's basic biology for you. Don't need a doctor or ph.d in psychology to see that the same thing that may eventually bring immunity in humans to HIV/AIDS, can actually bring about a stronger AIDS strain in some small way.

Look, I'm not trying to scare you here. Sorry if I have. But I could either sit here talking safely from a desk in my house without this being an immediate issue and tell you whatever small comments come out my ass, or I can just give you the push to take the innitiative and figure this thing out for real in your own life and possibly give you a reassuredness that way you couldn't faintly ever get in an entire thread on any given website of your peers.

AIDS is a blood transfered disease so simply put, it your dates penis has an open cut and you have an open cut in your mouth there is a small chance that you could contract the disease. There is no such thing as safe sex just smart decisions, make sure you and your partner have both been recently tested before engaging in sexual acts.

theonslaught saidtwo friends....


One got HIV from being a top, the bottom was tested but got tested to early and ended up having it.


One guy told me he got it from getting head, said something doc saying the guy giving the head must have had small cuts he didnt know about from brushing teeth and it got in urethra some how. I called bullshit cause the urethra is pretty long or so i thought so for something to travel that far from just a little cut? He showed me his docs statement and i was shocked and scared.

Many guys have it and dont even know it. They dont assume that being a top or oral will do anything. People get it alot cause one doesnt know they have it.


Stick with one person.... bottom line.

Umm why would his doctor give him a note stating how he got it?

Man, you' ve got to be kidding. This is serious stuff. You can get HIV from swallowing cum, anal intercourse, blow jobs,

Man .. you can't trusting anything except the fucking condoms!

Tommy

Okay, for whatever it's worth, I literally gave blowjobs at bath houses and in parks (behind bushes of course... not trying to put on a public show, after all...) and I NEVER turned up POZ until I started taking cock bareback anally, and I didn't even have the best oral health. So, while yes it's THEORETICALLY possible, I've not only read in the San Francisco Clinic's AIDS website that it's never been actually documented, I can tell you from experience that it's remote in the extreme.

However, I agree with those above who warn against taking a guy's load in your mouth if you have canker sores, gum disease, cuts in the mouth, or a recent tooth extraction.

YES !

This is an excerpt from the CDC's website on the matter:
http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/resources/qa/qa19.htm

Can I get HIV from oral sex?

Yes, it is possible for either partner to become infected with HIV through performing or receiving oral sex. There have been a few cases of HIV transmission from performing oral sex on a person infected with HIV. While no one knows exactly what the degree of risk is, evidence suggests that the risk is less than that of unprotected anal or vaginal sex.

If the person performing oral sex has HIV, blood from their mouth may enter the body of the person receiving oral sex through

* the lining of the urethra (the opening at the tip of the penis);
* the lining of the vagina or cervix;
* the lining of the anus; or
* directly into the body through small cuts or open sores.

If the person receiving oral sex has HIV, their blood, semen (cum), pre-seminal fluid (pre-cum), or vaginal fluid may contain the virus. Cells lining the mouth of the person performing oral sex may allow HIV to enter their body.

The risk of HIV transmission increases

* if the person performing oral sex has cuts or sores around or in their mouth or throat;
* if the person receiving oral sex ejaculates in the mouth of the person performing oral sex; or
* if the person receiving oral sex has another sexually transmitted disease (STD).

Not having (abstaining from) sex is the most effective way to avoid HIV.

If you choose to perform oral sex, and your partner is male,

* use a latex condom on the penis; or
* if you or your partner is allergic to latex, plastic (polyurethane) condoms can be used.

Studies have shown that latex condoms are very effective, though not perfect, in preventing HIV transmission when used correctly and consistently. If either partner is allergic to latex, plastic (polyurethane) condoms for either the male or female can be used. For more information about latex condoms

First the CDC deals in the absolutes. It is possible to get HIV thru oral only transmission. Just like it is possible for part of a plane to fall off and hit you on the head. Most of the medical community has come to agree the probability of transmission thru oral only transmission is remote and virtually non-existent from a poz person with an undetectable viral load.

The last cohesive study was back in the late 90's which showed a less than 7% transmission ratio. This study also dealt primarily with poz guys with high viral loads. There was a lot of data showing mitigating circumstances in the few cases that could be proven to be oral transmission only. Originally, the number was closer to 25% but after further investigation, turns out some of the participants had been less than honest about their "behavior". Most of the documented oral transmissions that could be proven showed a very high co-infection ratio of other STD's like syphilis or gonorrhea. So regardless of your HIV status, you should get routine STD checkups.

The adage about swallowing showed no significant increased risk either way. Everyone precums whether you see it or not. There is enough sperm in one drop of semen to populate a city the size of New York. Now multiply that by a factor of 10 for the possible viral load in a person not on any medications. Even with a viral load that high the transmission ratio has consistently shown to be very low. Saliva has also shown to have several natural anti-infection properties. Not to mention, the human mouth is a very hostile environment to a virus as fragile as HIV. Considering the large amount of viral content available, if it were more contagious the infection ratio would no different than unprotected anal sex.

A couple of guidelines if you are neg and worried about oral transmission. Do NOT brush or use mouthwash 30 minutes prior to sucking cock. Brushing/gargling actually increases damage to mucous/soft tissue and creates a higher ratio of semen to blood transmission. If you have open bite marks, sores or ulcers on/in your mouth, refrain from giving oral sex until they have healed. While swallowing hasn't really shown to be bad or good, if you are particularly worried, it is advisable not to swallow. The esophagus is prone to micro tears and small abrasions just from eating. Either way, after giving oral sex, gargle with an antiseptic mouth wash. a 50/50 mix of hydrogen peroxide and water is equally acceptable.

If you are the oral top, urinating after you cum helps to flush any excess fluid from the urethra. And/or rinse your cock off with normal soap and water. You don't have to scrub it just a simple wash and wipe is more than sufficient. If you notice any abrasions caused by a biting/scraping cocksucker, wash the area with soap/water and do not engage in oral sex until it has healed.

NFOMan saidMan, you' ve got to be kidding. This is serious stuff. You can get HIV from swallowing cum, anal intercourse, blow jobs,

Man .. you can't trusting anything except the fucking condoms!

Tommy

Ummm...you can still contract HIV from condoms, it is just unlikely.
The only way of avoiding an STD is to abstain from sex.

Most of the medical community has come to agree the probability of transmission thru oral only transmission is remote and virtually non-existent from a poz person with an undetectable viral load.

This isn't about people who who are positive with undetectable viral load though. Do the odds matter much when you are on the wrong side of them?

Anto saidMost of the medical community has come to agree the probability of transmission thru oral only transmission is remote and virtually non-existent from a poz person with an undetectable viral load.

This isn't about people who who are positive with undetectable viral load though. Do the odds matter much when you are on the wrong side of them?

@Anto ~ I don't understand your logic. Why exactly would it not be? And this isn't about playing the odds, it is about making a decision based on informed rational thought vs irrational fear.

Chances are slim to none.
I have actually given head to a couple of guys who were positive. I didn't know at the time and I wasn't thrilled when I found out, but I knew I was most likely okay. Happily to this day I still am.

I'm appalled that several people have stated that there are no documented cases when I can recall documented cases going back to the early 1990s. (The 2 cases had hundreds of partners per year, so they were playing Russian Roulette several times a day.)


Here's another shocking statement made above:

> AIDS is a blood transfered disease so simply put, it your dates penis has an open cut and you have an open cut in your mouth there is a small chance that you could contract the disease.

It appears that this person is not even aware that HIV can be transferred through semen.


We've come a long way from the days of "GRID", where fear of what then wasn't very well know caused a panic of abstinence (I think this is depicted in the movie "Long Time Companion"). With cocktails and few people dying, it seems the pendulum has swung too far the other way.

It sounds like we all need to do a better job educating ourselves and our peers. The information I provided in the first paragraph above came from a researcher at the U who participated in an on-line gay community on the U mainframe (long before we started calling these things "social networking" or even "sites"). We were lucky to have such a person and we even had a "face-to-face" gathering (at another prof's house) at which he gave a sex ed talk.

For my 2-cents of wisdom: if he is willing to have unsafe sex with you it likely means he's had unsafe sex with others before you. So you'll have the pleasure of sex with 1 person... but the risk of sex with all those people (and likely the people they had unsafe sex with). Think about that.

Just because something hasn't been proven, doesn't mean it wont be someday.

If I was going out tonight to pick up. I would not floss before going out. Depends on the condition of your mouth, gums.

But then I had a sexual relationship with a guy for a few years, who was HIV, and who is now dead from aids; something he forgot to tell me, even after I asked, and we did lots of unprotected things, and I'm still HIV-!

what kind of risk does the guy receiving the blow job have?
Also, why do guys swallow on the first blowjob without knowing sexual history? arent they more at risk?

Yes, it is possible for either partner to become infected with HIV through performing or receiving oral sex. There have been a few cases of HIV transmission from performing oral sex on a person infected with HIV. While no one knows exactly what the degree of risk is, evidence suggests that the risk is less than that of unprotected anal or vaginal sex.

If the person performing oral sex has HIV, blood from their mouth may enter the body of the person receiving oral sex through

the lining of the urethra (the opening at the tip of the penis);
the lining of the vagina or cervix;
the lining of the anus; or
directly into the body through small cuts or open sores.
If the person receiving oral sex has HIV, their blood, semen (cum), pre-seminal fluid (pre-cum), or vaginal fluid may contain the virus. Cells lining the mouth of the person performing oral sex may allow HIV to enter their body.

The risk of HIV transmission increases

if the person performing oral sex has cuts or sores around or in their mouth or throat;
if the person receiving oral sex ejaculates in the mouth of the person performing oral sex; or
if the person receiving oral sex has another sexually transmitted disease (STD).
Not having (abstaining from) sex is the most effective way to avoid HIV.

If you choose to perform oral sex, and your partner is male,

use a latex condom on the penis; or
if you or your partner is allergic to latex, plastic (polyurethane) condoms can be used.
Studies have shown that latex condoms are very effective, though not perfect, in preventing HIV transmission when used correctly and consistently. If either partner is allergic to latex, plastic (polyurethane) condoms for either the male or female can be used. For more information about latex condoms, see "Male Latex Condoms and Sexually Transmitted Diseases."

If you choose to have oral sex, and your partner is female,

use a latex barrier (such as a natural rubber latex sheet, a dental dam or a cut-open condom that makes a square) between your mouth and the vagina. A latex barrier such as a dental dam reduces the risk of blood or vaginal fluids entering your mouth. Plastic food wrap also can be used as a barrier.
If you choose to perform oral sex with either a male or female partner and this sex includes oral contact with your partners anus (analingus or rimming),

use a latex barrier (such as a natural rubber latex sheet, a dental dam or a cut-open condom that makes a square) between your mouth and the anus. Plastic food wrap also can be used as a barrier.
If you choose to share sex toys with your partner, such as dildos or vibrators,

each partner should use a new condom on the sex toy; and
be sure to clean sex toys between each use.
If you would like more information or have personal concerns, call CDC-INFO 24 Hours/Day at 1-800-CDC-INFO (232-4636), 1-888-232-6348 (TTY), in English, en Español.

Receiving a BJ puts one at increased risk for;
Gonorrhea - aka gonococcal urethritis (drip)
Chlaymdia - aka non-gonoccocal urethritis aka chlamydial urethritis
Non-specific urethritis (not due to the more common organisms like gonorrhea or chlaymida) - but rather a different organism or combintation of them like; trichomonas, mycoplasma, herpes, and a host of other viruses, bacteria, and who knows what other mouth organism like streptococcus.

How likely/common is this? First of all the other person has to have the condition to pass it on AND most of the time they are unaware!
Secondly it is difficult to answer the question with certainty because; most men engage in other sexual activity (during the same encounter), lie, deny, or do not divulge that kind of informatiod during a face to face medical interview, was it a deep BJ, how long, etc.

I would say, if you decide to play the odds game - be aware - and should it happen - you knew exactly what you were doing - and move forward with the treatment/consequences.

Just read Larry Kramer's presentation at Cooper Union on what he calls "The Tragedy of Today's Gays."

Here's the link, is a long read but probably the most concise case around the HIV virus and how it has shaped Gay men today.

http://towleroad.typepad.com/towleroad/2004/11/larry_kramer_sp.html

This is not scare anyone but to share valuable information.

hay i have a question i had oral sex with a girl we kissed and she sucked my cock i was not wearing condom and i didnt cum in her mouth i dont know if that girl has hiv or not but i was quite worried after that. can someone tell can u get infected with hiv this way.

THE REAL ANSWER IS - NO ONE KNOWS!!!!

Look at all the posts to this question - they are all contradictory. One person says something - the other says another thing... one website will say yes the others will say no. What shocks me the most is that now some people are saying its possible to get HIV even by recieving oral sex. Show me ONE DOCUMENTED case proof where someone was infected by HIV from getting his dick sucked???

Theoretically - someone's mouth has to be Bleeding profusely for them to infect a guy by sucking his dick. Why the hell would anyone put their dick in a bloody mouth???

The mystery remains unsolved - dont suck everyone... let it be special and take precautions - get tested or use a condom... or better still dont have any sex. I am amazed to see how so many guys are freaked out by diseases and yet lead a promiscous lifestyle - now if all gay men (or at least the majority) believed in Monogamous healthy relationships and were more honest to themselves as well as others - then HIV and disease would not be such a HUGE problem amongst gays. Do you ever hear str8 people posting so many messages anywhere about HIV or worrying so much about STDs??? But STDs and HIV have become an everyday topic of conversation amongst Gays everywhere, its a topic in most gay films as well - because it all comes from the promiscuity and LYING behaviour of gay men in general. There is a Huge problem with Gay men - and we need to recognize / accept that problem first before attempting to solve it.

Stop fucking around and try to settle down!!!!!

so it means i was getting worried needlessly i was thinking of geting a hiv test how many days after u have sex should u take that test dose it mean should not take the test.

Sometimes I have to remind myself that there are guys on this site born after the big panic days of 1987, 1988 or around that time. In the days prior to AZT, gay men walked around with huge viral loads of HIV. Contagion is always higher with a large viral load. Statistically your odds are better today. But think: we're talking about odds.

With the ability of HIV to mutate -- the strains seen today are radically different than those first few cases in the 1980's -- caution is always advised.

ok so if u want to take hiv how long after sex u should take the test on some other pages it says u should take the test after 3 months man its so long what do u say.

ok so if u want to take hiv test how long after sex u should take the test. on some other pages it says u should take the test after 3 months man its so long what do u say.

Samia, you are at no risk of HIV from receiving oral sex. The only fluid that came in contact with your genitals was the girl's saliva. Saliva does not transmit HIV. So relax, you're fine.

Regarding HIV from giving oral sex, there have been several studies that showed that the risk of transmission is practically non existent. It may be possible if you let the guy cum in your mouth and you have open sores or a piercing. However, the risk is very small if at all.

Most "documented" cases of oral transmission, end up being guys who had anal or other forms of sex that were either protected and the condom failed or unprotected, and they were too embarrassed to say.

NO... a big NO. There are zero documented cases. Zero!

The only way it could be possible, if you were having oral sex with an open mouth wound. So unless he's sliding in over a cold sore... enjoy!

Again.. no... but read this.

http://aidsmap.com/en/news/4E9D555B-18FB-4D56-B912-2C28AFCCD36B.asp

bostudent87 said so can you get hiv from unprotected oral sex? This might be a dumb question, so I guess I'm looking for someone more experienced than myself to answer. I know you can obviously get other std's, but I heard somewhere that the chance of getting HIV is basically zero. So should I feel safe with unprotected oral sex? do you do it, and if so do you worry about it?

thanks for the replys guys i feel better. just one question i have if u search this on google the other pages says if blood is coming out of a persons mouth it can enter the hole on ur penis then u can get infected why they say that.

This question gets raised every week or two.

The answer is YES. Even though the incidence is low, it DOES happen.

Visit the Centers for Disease Control at http://www.cdc.gov to read all about it.

Anyone telling you no is ill-informed.

LOL. This is an area where you don't want to be experienced.

I am not sure why this is still a topic of discussion, but the evidence seems to point to the answer YES (albeit far less risky then unprotected anal).

I certainly am living proof of the risks of unprotected oral sex. Of course there will be people who say you cannot prove it, but I will provide you with the following evidence and you cannot make up your own minds.

1. Had protected anal sex maybe 3 times in my life.

2. Had unprotected oral sex dozens of times. Sexual partner never came in my mouth.

Tested positive for HIV in 1995.

I guess theoretically the condom could have leaked and I could have gotten it that way, but the probability of that happening is very slight (especially since I didn't suspect a problem with the condom at the time).

I have had others on RJ send me e-mails saying they likely got it from unprotected oral sex, so don't assume the risk is zero. Check out "TheBody.com" website to get up to date information regarding HIV and the risk of transmission.

Sex is fun, but just because something is fun does not mean it is risk-free.

Honestly.....I consider unprotected oral sex a very very low risk, and I am willing to take that risk if the situation seems right. I know there is a low risk of infection from pre-cum too, but don't let a guy cum in my mouth.

Unprotected anal sex is a different story. Always use condoms.

ChuckyStud, according to the CDC, you can get HIV from kissing as well.
Is rubbing noses the future of safe sex?

http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/resources/qa/qa17.htm

On the Cheek:

HIV is not transmitted casually, so kissing on the cheek is very safe. Even if the other person has the virus, your unbroken skin is a good barrier. No one has become infected from such ordinary social contact as dry kisses, hugs, and handshakes.

Open-Mouth Kissing:

Open-mouth kissing is considered a very low-risk activity for the transmission of HIV. However, prolonged open-mouth kissing could damage the mouth or lips and allow HIV to pass from an infected person to a partner and then enter the body through cuts or sores in the mouth. Because of this possible risk, the CDC recommends against open-mouth kissing with an infected partner.

One case suggests that a woman became infected with HIV from her sex partner through exposure to contaminated blood during open-mouth kissing.

Webster666 saidNO.
You'll hear all he ridiculous warnings about no sex after you flossed your teeth, no sex after you had your teeth cleaned at the dentist, and on and on.
NO.
The answer is, NO.
There has been not one proven case of transmission of HIV through oral sex.

WRONG!

Webster666 saidNO.
You'll hear all he ridiculous warnings about no sex after you flossed your teeth, no sex after you had your teeth cleaned at the dentist, and on and on.
NO.
The answer is, NO.
There has been not one proven case of transmission of HIV through oral sex.

That is a very inaccurate bit of information you've given. As we all (should) know, HIV is transmitted through semen and blood. Therefore, if you have an open cut in your mouth and come into contact with infected semen (pre-cum included), you are putting yourself at risk for HIV transmission.

I think it's this kind of misinformed guidance that keeps the spread of HIV running rampant. Understand the facts before passing off opinions as facts. You could potentially prevent yourself and others from continuing the cycle of HIV transmission.

HIV isn't so easily transmitted. You need a certain quantity of blood or semen, in a low oxygen environment, for transmission to be effective.

I remember reading once that even if someone were to get an IV infusion of infected blood, their chance of infection was 50%. Getting pricked by a needle with infected blood in a healthcare setting, carried a 1 in 3000 chance of contracting HIV.

So, it's not worth going through life worrying about every possiblility. You're more at risk getting into a car, than you are of contracting HIV via any one of these highly unlikely routes.

Use a condom for anal, don't let people cum in your mouth, and just use common sense. Stress and worrying have a negative effect on people's health too.

Naturally, the more partners / encounters you have, the higher the risk becomes.

what about ingesting cum? I never let guys cum in my mouth but sometimes precum makes its way through? is that bad? healthy mouth, no cuts, sores or anything.

HIV is said to be neutralized by the acidity in your stomach. So, if it can get that far, it shouldn't cause infection.

In general, just try to limit your exposure to bodily fluids and use some good judgement when selecting partners. Sex carries risks, but so do many other areas of life. Learning to manage them is key.

I have suffered more pain from worrying constantly about infection than needed, because after four years I am neg and I believe I owe that to getting to know my partners and picking guys who are mostly oral like myself and if ever porking them, using a condom. However, I have had vanilla a couple times and it was great. I call it extreme vanilla because there was no sucking of the shaft and just heavy petting and kissing. If really nervous, do this and fantasize about taking his load in your mouth later when you jerk off.

Hi Guys

I need some advice - i am bi-sexual and am pretty new to my guy feelings

i recently gave a man (i met of net) oral sex - he did not cum in my mouth and i am pretty sure that i didnt have any cuts/sores


i got tested for antibody's 6 weeks after and came back negative!

i spoke to the man recently, and i told me that he went for a DUO test (antigen/antibody) test 2 weeks after i met him, which came back negative...

he said that he didnt have any sex in the few weeks before me and therefore his test is reliable...

i am a bit unsure?

do you think i can move on from this , considering my 6 week neg, his neg , and the fact he didnt cum in my mouth?

Thankyou

Yes, you need to move on. You did not become infected with HIV, and as long as you stick to safe sex, and safer oral sex (like not receiving cum which is disgusting, or having noticeable cuts) then you will not get it. Stop worrying, ok? say OK!

Mepark saidYes, you need to move on. You did not become infected with HIV, and as long as you stick to safe sex, and safer oral sex (like not receiving cum which is disgusting, or having noticeable cuts) then you will not get it. Stop worrying, ok? say OK!

i will move on...i just am unsure about whether his test would have covered all his actions..

he said he only has safe anal, and therefore would have had to got HIV from oral in the previous week or so for it not to have been pick up by a DUO test..

reading that, it does sound very far fetched - i admit. but im just worried becasue ive never met a man off the internet before - so am a bit anxious

how accurate is my 6 week antibody test do you think?

Although it's good to be cautious and knowledgeable , you can't live in a bubble. The prevailing expert opinion seems to be "possible but unlikely" in regards to oral sex. I am HIV negative and not very active at all.

A couple of friends of mine that are HIV positive just seem so overburdened with making sure no one gets it from them. They hesitate to let me drink from the same glass or kiss me on the lips good night. I guess what I'm trying to say is, a house might fall on you today, a drunk driver might kill you tomorrow, we are all lucky to still be alive. Keep educated and be cautious regarding HIV infection, but don't give up your humanity in doing so.

Do NOT call the CDC....its a bunch of phone technicians in Atlanta reading of a manual.They believe kissing is low risk (when there hasnt one cdocumented case).

Use this SITE....its less religious, more scientific.

www.thebody.org

You can ask the Dr a question under "Ask the experts" , but most of what you want to know will be in the Archive, which you can search.

http://www.thebody.com/Forums/AIDS/SafeSex/index.html

Nobody will say anything is 100% safe or provide you with total reassurance. GOOD LUCK.

I was a little horny until I read this post.

HIV is spread from one guy to another by penetrative sex and blood to blood contact. So theoretically if you have a cut on your lips or in your mouth and it is contaminated with blood from anywhere such as a scratch or cut on the other guy it is possible to get infected. The real problem is, as you say, stds, including syphylis which can be spread by unprotected oral sex.

devontrainer said
HIV is spread from one guy to another by penetrative sex and blood to blood contact. So theoretically if you have a cut on your lips or in your mouth and it is contaminated with blood from anywhere such as a scratch or cut on the other guy it is possible to get infected. The real problem is, as you say, stds, including syphylis which can be spread by unprotected oral sex.

If diseases like syphilis, gonorrhea, etc are only temporary, why are they still circulating like mad in the general population? If everyone starts out "clean", how does anybody get infected with an STD?

Not necessarily directed at you devon but that's a question I've wanted to hear the answer to ever since I first heard about STDs when they were teaching us about abstinence in Elementary/Intermediate school.

Hi,

I have been reading all of this and it’s all very helpful information...

I have recently in the last 6 months or so been obsessed with cottaging in local public toilets and the sauna at the gym...

Not on any occasion have I had anal sex unprotected or not but I have done the following...

Hand Jobs sometimes with them spitting on mine as lube etc...

Body Touching

Received and given oral sex for literally a few seconds only a couple of times..

I have fingered a couple of guys again for small lengths of time and am worried as I bite my nails badly on a daily basis and am wondering if there is an possibility of picking up the virus this way as I understand the rectum fluid has HIV in it...

Finally and what has worried me the most was the last time I did anything was in the sauna at the gym and the guy stood directly behind and cum at the top of my crack where it would have dribbled down etc, I had a towel on some of it almost immediately and also was in the shower within 10 or 20 seconds having it washed off etc, what worries me if that I have piles, only very small ones but I still have piles which always bleed whenever I clean myself after going to the toilet etc and I am worried that this could be a route for infection...

I am really freaking out because the honest truth is I have an boyfriend who I love dearly but I have been doing this behind his back, I always try to be safe i.e. not having any anal sex and doing oral only a couple of times and for very short periods but I am still freaking out...

If anything this has killed my desire to cottage anymore but I am just praying that I haven't been infected..

Can you guys give me your opinions?

Thanks

rebel2010 saidHi,

I have been reading all of this and it’s all very helpful information...

I have recently in the last 6 months or so been obsessed with cottaging in local public toilets and the sauna at the gym...

Not on any occasion have I had anal sex unprotected or not but I have done the following...

Hand Jobs sometimes with them spitting on mine as lube etc...

Body Touching

Received and given oral sex for literally a few seconds only a couple of times..

I have fingered a couple of guys again for small lengths of time and am worried as I bite my nails badly on a daily basis and am wondering if there is an possibility of picking up the virus this way as I understand the rectum fluid has HIV in it...

Finally and what has worried me the most was the last time I did anything was in the sauna at the gym and the guy stood directly behind and cum at the top of my crack where it would have dribbled down etc, I had a towel on some of it almost immediately and also was in the shower within 10 or 20 seconds having it washed off etc, what worries me if that I have piles, only very small ones but I still have piles which always bleed whenever I clean myself after going to the toilet etc and I am worried that this could be a route for infection...

I am really freaking out because the honest truth is I have an boyfriend who I love dearly but I have been doing this behind his back, I always try to be safe i.e. not having any anal sex and doing oral only a couple of times and for very short periods but I am still freaking out...

If anything this has killed my desire to cottage anymore but I am just praying that I haven't been infected..

Can you guys give me your opinions?

Thanks

You asked, so here's my opinion:

1: You have virtually NO risk of contracting HIV from the sex acts you've listed. You DO, however, seem to run the risk of being rather melodramatic.

2: The only thing you're risking is the trust of your BF and your relationship. If you're going to play around on the side, you OWE IT TO YOUR BF to tell him the truth about it. Who knows? Maybe he's okay with an open relationship.

But right now, your relationship is in more danger due to what appears to be dishonesty on your part rather that any threat of HIV. If you love your BF so dearly, you owe him the truth.

YES u can...don't listen to anyone telling u anything differently

rebel2010 said

Can you guys give me your opinions?

Thanks

While none of the things you listed put you into the high risk category for HIV transmission, other STD's aren't nearly as hard to acquire. If you and your BF don't currently use protection, you better start. And hey, when he asks why you need to, you can confess to cheating on him in toilets and saunas! Two birds with one stone!

Why would anyone take a load in their mouths?...Just blow him and let him come outside your mouth!!!! Yikes