I'm NOT proud of being gay!

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    Apr 03, 2009 8:54 PM GMT

    "I'm proud of myself, I'm proud of being a goodlooking man, a straight acting man, I'm proud of my relationships with guys.. But if something I wear make me look "gay", I'm gonna change it.. if somebody say that I look gay or sound gay I'll take it as an offense" -"proud of being the straight gay man"


    Do you feel identified with this ??

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    Apr 03, 2009 8:56 PM GMT
    What a colossal ass hole. I wonder if he is additionally proud of his oh so obvious internalized homophobia.
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    Apr 03, 2009 8:58 PM GMT
    MunchingZombie saidWhat a colossal ass hole. I wonder if he is additionally proud of his oh so obvious internalized homophobia.


    I was waiting for your post icon_biggrin.gif ... so you think it's a sign of homophobia ??
    You don't find yourself sometimes concerned about how "gay" you look or sound ?
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    Apr 03, 2009 9:07 PM GMT
    good lord no girl.. I don't identify with that.. I don't care if someone calls me gay, I dun care if someone calls me straight.. its allllll good
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    Apr 03, 2009 9:08 PM GMT

    << Jingle gay, jingle gay, gay gay all the way!!!
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    Apr 03, 2009 9:18 PM GMT
    GHoSTic said
    MunchingZombie saidWhat a colossal ass hole. I wonder if he is additionally proud of his oh so obvious internalized homophobia.


    I was waiting for your post icon_biggrin.gif ... so you think it's a sign of homophobia ??
    You don't find yourself sometimes concerned about how "gay" you look or sound ?


    I look and sound how I look and sound. I am comfortable with who I am and I don't fear who I will become in the future. If someone else gets their panties in a knot because I may "act gay" then that is their problem not mine.
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    Apr 03, 2009 9:28 PM GMT
    Cool.. But I'm sure lots of guys here identify with that, and mostly afraid or ashamed of admitting ..

    It's very common in our community. we always judge femine guys or gayish guys ... It's like we're telling the straight people that : "Here , we are exactly look/talk like you and we also discriminate against those femine queers as you do" ..

    so we can be more accepted by them .
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    Apr 03, 2009 9:35 PM GMT
    Two things. They are two different things. This means they are not the same thing.

    (1) Camp and effeminate behaviour. Not tied to sexuality
    (2) Same sex sexual desire. Not tied to a particular way of speaking, waving hands or dressing.

    Why? Why do people STILL get these things confused?

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    Apr 03, 2009 9:45 PM GMT
    Lostboy saidTwo things. They are two different things. This means they are not the same thing.

    (1) Camp and effeminate behaviour. Not tied to sexuality
    (2) Same sex sexual desire. Not tied to a particular way of speaking, waving hands or dressing.

    Why? Why do people STILL get these things confused?



    I mentioned these points seperately .. But the issue here, just to make it clear, that someone doesn't want to be known as "gay", but to be known as straight-acting-gay in the gay community. and straight in the straight one..

    As it appears he's not ashamed of his sexuality, but of the look that can be associated with this seuxality .. the "gay" stereotype that is viewed as negative..
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    Apr 03, 2009 9:50 PM GMT

    I'm proud of that new picture. It makes you look like a pornstar from the 70's.

    Maybe I used to identify with the original post, but thank god, I've grown as a person since then. It takes A LOT of energy to always worry about appearing as the extreme of what you are. It's also senseless if you are not. It's much easier to be who you are and come what may. This is easy to say because a lot of what makes me homosexual (in the way of traits and behaviors) are internalized. On the surface, I am very gruff and some say, offputting due to how gruff.

    However, one look in my school satchel might reveal a variety of glitter pens and pencils ornamented with colorful prints in butterflies and tropical flowers. A further investigation might produce my I-Pod (I'm outed if you hear that). If you were determined enough to stick with me, you might observe that I cover my mouth coyly with one hand everytime I laugh and that I do look when I pass boutiques (at the clothes), and that a faint "damn" could be heard from me by the attentive ear, when goodlooking men walked past us. Watching more and you'd find very delicate mannerisms unusual for such a man's man. Furthermore, I don't have a girlfriend and I never look at girls, if I do, one might find that my eyes are noticably up (looking at her hair) or decidedly lower right (looking at her bag). I make no guams about it, and while I'm not a limp wrister, people with the time to kill, have noticed everything I listed and come to the accordant conclusion.

    I have tried to suppress myself in the past, but I felt like a robin red breast in a cage. There is no call for it. In my youth, I was very....well not boyish so i'd have to say girly, but I made a concentrated effort to check those traits and due to my determination and the severity of the situation (where I live), it worked. I may have just matured, maybe I did and I also suppressed my real self? Considering the latter, if I were to find myself in the right environment, my former traits might manifest more. I have absolutely no issue with it.

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    Apr 03, 2009 9:57 PM GMT
    Exactly .. society is what can make you think like this .. but you partially admit your identification with that text .. icon_biggrin.gif

    And a pornstar from the 70's ? I'm flattered icon_rolleyes.gif .. am I supposed to ?
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    Apr 03, 2009 9:57 PM GMT
    GHoSTic saidCool.. But I'm sure lots of guys here identify with that, and mostly afraid or ashamed of admitting ..

    It's very common in our community. we always judge femine guys or gayish guys ... It's like we're telling the straight people that : "Here , we are exactly look/talk like you and we also discriminate against those femine queers as you do" ..

    so we can be more accepted by them .


    In Quentin Crisps' autobiography (and biography of the 20th century) The Naked Civil Servant he goes into a gay bar in closeted 1950's London. He is promptly kicked out of the bar by the closeted, straight-acting people for fear that his presence will alert the world that they are each gay.

    That was true in the 50's and it is true now. People fear the fems because they hate to see themselves in them. It is the brand new form of being closeted.
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    Apr 03, 2009 10:00 PM GMT
    I gesticulate because I learned sign language at a young age damn it! Not because I like dick!
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    Apr 03, 2009 10:04 PM GMT
    Well if he is massively turned off by (1), what´s the problem? I don´t like beards that much. If he´s ashamed of (2) then he needs to sit down and work through a few issues....
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    Apr 03, 2009 10:06 PM GMT
    I gesticulate because my hands turn me on...
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    Apr 03, 2009 10:11 PM GMT
    lilTanker saidI gesticulate because my hands turn me on...



    LOLLLLLLL ! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

    Well .. the subject here is mostly "why you don't gesticulate?" ..
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    Apr 03, 2009 10:20 PM GMT

    Classic Male Pulchritude....yes, most defnitely flattered.
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    Apr 03, 2009 10:22 PM GMT
    all the hand wavers are outing themselves

    LOL
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    Apr 03, 2009 10:23 PM GMT
    lilTanker saidI gesticulate because my hands turn me on...


    Mmm... lilTanker hands. *Gurgles*
    icon_wink.gif

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    Apr 03, 2009 10:44 PM GMT
    Where I live, there is a strong bias against gay men. While I was training to be a lifeguard, some of the fellow club members - who were all straight - took a dislike to me and whispered to each other, looking at me from the corner of their eyes. But none of them came up to me and dealt with the problem, perhaps they were afraid I'll punch the instigater in the mouth - or discover, to their dismay, that I wasn't gay after all.
    This sort of thing continued, on and off, until relatively recent, when I came out of the sauna, a lifeguard on duty laughed with his colleagues (including a female) while I walked past, and emitted a wolf-whistle. Tough luck on him, the surveillience camera was tuned on to them and the manager was watching. He was promptly fired.
    Therefore, I can understand Ghostic's situation when intermingling with such crap morons, the need to keep your guard up.
    On the other hand, such morons have such low self esteem, that they need a gay person around to make themselves feel good with their own fragile egos.
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    Apr 03, 2009 10:52 PM GMT
    GHoSTic said
    "I'm proud of myself, I'm proud of being a goodlooking man, a straight acting man, I'm proud of my relationships with guys.. But if something I wear make me look "gay", I'm gonna change it.. if somebody say that I look gay or sound gay I'll take it as an offense" -"proud of being the straight gay man"


    Do you feel identified with this ??



    He is stereotyping. Trotting out tired stereotypes at that. Not impressed.
  • jgymnast733

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    Apr 03, 2009 11:14 PM GMT
    If you dont love yourself
    how n the hell you gonna love somebody else,
    can i get a amen.....icon_idea.gif
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    Apr 03, 2009 11:21 PM GMT
    amen
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    Apr 03, 2009 11:25 PM GMT
    Lame.

    I love how people get all bent over identifying with "gay." For me, it means a willingness to challenge gender roles. Anyone who can't handle their own femininity and masculinity is completely uninteresting. But, that is just how I feel.

    Hell, I am sporing a pink hat today (for all of my Cali teachers)... ya it looks "gay" but I don't really give a shiz... and neither should anyone else.
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    Apr 03, 2009 11:27 PM GMT
    Amen to that Brother Jgymnast733.

    This dude has issues. "Straight-acting"? Anyone straight-acting has issues and clearly isn't proud of their self because they have identity problems and worry about how people will view them.

    As for me you either love me or hate me but regardless of your opinions of me I'm still gonna be me and just keep on truckin'. Holla.