Energizer Bunny arrested...

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 3:36 AM GMT
    charged with battery.


    rimshot.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 3:38 AM GMT
    I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places.


    He told me to quit going to those places.


    rimshot.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 3:40 AM GMT
    http://www.instantrimshot.com/
  • DCEric

    Posts: 3713

    Apr 05, 2009 12:09 PM GMT
    Horse walks into a bar.
    Bartender says, "why the long face?"

    "Doctor, every morning, when I drink my coffee I get a pain in my forehead."
    "Take the spoon out."

    Where do you find a no-legged dog?
    Right where you left him.

    What do you get when you cross a rooster and an owl?
    A cock that stays up all night.

    What's the ultimate rejection?
    When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.
  • alwaysonpoint

    Posts: 173

    Apr 05, 2009 12:11 PM GMT
    bah dah bum! cough. clap.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 12:29 PM GMT
    Please make it stop icon_sad.gif
  • DCEric

    Posts: 3713

    Apr 05, 2009 12:50 PM GMT
    Did you say you wanted more? OK:

    Two cannibals are eating a clown. One stops and says to the other:
    ''Does this taste funny to you?''

    Why did the gypsy walk funny?
    Because he had crystal balls.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 4:39 PM GMT
    You, sir, are a crime against humanity.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 4:43 PM GMT
    DCEric saidHorse walks into a bar.
    Bartender says, "why the long face?"

    "Doctor, every morning, when I drink my coffee I get a pain in my forehead."
    "Take the spoon out."

    Where do you find a no-legged dog?
    Right where you left him.

    What do you get when you cross a rooster and an owl?
    A cock that stays up all night.

    What's the ultimate rejection?
    When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.


    I love them!!icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 4:46 PM GMT
    "Doctor, it hurts when I press here."

    "Don't press there."

    Why in gawd's name are we suddenly doing Henny Youngman?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 4:48 PM GMT
    DCEric saidDid you say you wanted more? OK:

    Two cannibals are eating a clown. One stops and says to the other:
    ''Does this taste funny to you?''

    Why did the gypsy walk funny?
    Because he had crystal balls.


    YES YES YES !! give me more of that ...stronger , faster !!
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Apr 05, 2009 4:51 PM GMT
    A guy goes to his doctor and says "Doc, I don't know what's wrong with me. I can't stop singing 'She's a Lady' and 'What's New Pussycat?'. I need your help!"

    The doctor gets out his medical encyclopedia, thumbs through and says, "Ah, here it is. Sounds like you've contracted Tom Jones Disease."

    The guy says, "I've never heard of that. Is it rare?"

    The doctor says, "It's not unusual."
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 4:53 PM GMT
    EL Oh EL?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 4:59 PM GMT
    You want Henny Youngman, you get Henny Youngman:

    My wife asked me to take her somewhere for our anniversary where she'd never been before. I told her 'Try the kitchen.'

    A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months.

    I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.

    If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving.

    My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.

    The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

    When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

    You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.

    When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays.

    There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.

    My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.

    RIM SHOT
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 5:10 PM GMT
    Red_Vespa saidYou want Henny Youngman, you get Henny Youngman:


    A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months.

    My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.

    RIM SHOT


    Luv itttt
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 05, 2009 5:11 PM GMT
    DCEric said

    What's the ultimate rejection?
    When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep.


    OMG! Can that really happen? I'm scared now...icon_cry.gif
  • EricLA

    Posts: 3461

    Apr 05, 2009 5:43 PM GMT
    I knew this was going to happen to Caslon when he passed 10000 posts. He's jumped the shark. I prefer the early funny Cas.

    ;-)