Continued from previous post Part One -
The greater our Light, the more apparent our Shadow becomes. Just as on a bright and sunny day, we can see our physical shadow more easily than when the light of the Sun is obscured behind clouds, so too is the case with our personal darkness. The greater our own Light becomes, the greater our Shadow becomes visible. The more we as individuals aspire to embrace our Light, one thing we also must do is to examine and embrace the dark aspects of the Shadow. Our Light serves nothing more than a beacon to illuminate our inner darkness. Just as a flashlight in a darkened room allows us to witness the things stored there, so too will our Light empower us with the gift to witness and, ultimately, to face and embrace the darkened recesses of our inner soul.
Owning our dark and acting upon our dark are two entirely different matters. As many of us celebrate Halloween this year, I encourage you to acknowledge those hidden and scary aspects of your consciousness, but do not say that you have to act upon those destructive thoughts and tendencies. I do not mean being unaccountable for our actions or acting out to create mayhem on the planet. We need to remember that we are the ones who were born with both our Light and our Dark, and each of us is responsible for owning and ensuring that they both are healthily expressed in their own proper way. By acknowledging our Shadow, we do not in any way mean that we have to become subservient to the Dark. When we are in full possession of our Dark, we abide in a greater place of integrity with our Highest Potential Self. It is through our ability to re-integrate our Dark into the Greater Whole that we experience the true definition of “health” and become “whole” in mind, body, heart and spirit. As gay men, the first step to owning our Shadow, is for us to begin taking responsibility for our actions, our thoughts, and our words. The more we become accountable for these hidden aspects of our consciousness, the more we begin to live from a place of freedom, authentic health and genuine happiness. As we individually become integrated and healed, so too do all our gay brethren and the rest of society.

Please keep in mind that we all hold onto Darkness, for it is part of what makes us human. To deny our individual Darkness, is to deny our humanity. I invite you to honor this sacred time of the year as you feel your Dark wanting to be heard - close your eyes, connect to your breath deep into your body and listen to the words this disowned part of yourself is saying. For many of us this Dark speaks to us in the language of thoughts and feelings – rage, shame, frustration, contempt, disgust, irritation, impatience, sadness, etc. The key to “heal” and integrate the Dark and bring into “wholeness” the vulnerable emotions that our Shadow reveals is to recognize what are the thoughts and belief systems that we have created fueling these emotions. From a place of compassion and self-acceptance, acknowledge these self-limiting judgments and perceptions in order for them to be reintegrated fully and completely with all parts of your sacred Self.

Regardless whether you choose to honor Halloween rejoice in knowing that this is a sacred occasion for each of us as gay men to come to terms with our hidden inner Darkness and those aspects of our consciousness that have been ignored and neglected for far too long in our life. As gay men, to the extent that we each are at war internally with our own Dark and refuse to make peace with our unhealed demons and devils, the more we see this battle magnified on a larger scale in our gay community, our streets, our homes, our schools, our families and our planet. By each of us setting our intention to take the personal responsibility to heal the pain of our disowned Dark, we each in our own way allow the polarized Dark and Light of humanity to unite into a harmonious integrated greater whole. Each of us can make the difference – we are ALL in this together, my friends! As the great civil leader Mahatma Gandhi once said, “Be the change that you want to see in the world.”

Halloween provides the safe space not only for the underbelly of society but for the darkness within us to have a healthy opportunity to be brought from occlusion into openness, from exclusion into inclusion, from fear of judgment to acceptance. I would actually go so far as to say that everyday can be celebrated as Halloween – for everyday is a sacred opportunity to let our Dark come out and to be healthily acknowledged as it reunites with our Light. As you do so, remember that we do not have to let Halloween be the only day that these aspects of our psyche can come out and play, but know that every day is an opportunity to live, breathe and celebrate ALL THAT YOU ARE!

May You Always Be LIVING YOUR LIGHT™ from a place of grace, compassion, and intention as you befriend and celebrate your Dark this Halloween. I invite you please to feel free to forward this article to others that may find it of interest.

Jay Kumar, M.A. is a professional motivational and inspirational speaker and the founder of LIVING YOUR LIGHT™ - an organization advancing Creative Conscious Living for the planet. Having studied and trained in both the U.S. and India, he masterfully bridges ancient wisdom with the modern world as an accomplished yoga instructor, spiritual counselor, integrative health therapist and writer. His personal intention is for at least one person a day on the planet to remember who they truly are by living from a place of authenticity and freedom in alignment with their Spirit! To learn more please visit