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ok, so I have nothing against gay pride parades in theory--I think they would be a great way to show the world who we are, promote our messages, and make people see we are just like everyone else--my problem comes when half naked men come dancing down the street in chaps or other exotic attire (I know right, supposed to be ever gay guy's dream) why does gay pride have to be sexual, why can't we broadcast something we are proud of, show me a gay person who does their job and contibutes to society, I am not proud that the only thing we feel we can march around are sex-crazed guys, it is belittling and makes the rest of the world stereotype us; not all of us go to sex parties or have threesomes; am I alone in this?

ps: I just found out this thread has already been "done and overdone" so sorry for that

I think you see what the media wants you to see. Yea, some people get crazy, but really you don't see people behaving any better at Spring Break. For some people Pride is an outlet to air their pent up frustration because they don't come from a large liberal minded place. I'd consider you to be fortunate living in Boston. There you have a lot of social and recreational opportunities available to you outside of the bar scene. Here we have a few which I try to take advantage of...then some places have none. The thing that I had to work on was remembering that other people's actions, especially the actions of strangers do not affect my personal integrity.

The bigger picture is prides vary and come in all kinds of different shapes and sizes. There are a variety of activities available at most events. I know that the Atlanta Pride and San Diego Pride have road races which draw several hundred runners. Other cities host sports tournaments affiliated with their pride. I think most strive for a family friendly something for everyone type atmosphere. A news segment going for novelty or shock value is not going to show a couple of normal looking men walking with a small child and pushing another in a stroller with a golden retriever. Why? Because it's nice, but it's something you can see everyday and not think anything of. It's not interesting.

NEXT!!!!

This issue has been discussed in three other forums before...and I believe we have beaten the horse to death...

http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/301214/

- David

dfrourke saidNEXT!!!!

This issue has been discussed in three other forums before...and I believe we have beaten the horse to death...

http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/301214/

- David

HEY I WROTE THAT! lol

OP, some advice... Don't open up a "can of worms." lol

bostudentI am not proud that the only thing we feel we can march around are sex-crazed guys

Well if you don't like them, pass them on to me.

I think they serve and have served their purpose.... making the general public aware of the gay community, gay causes. It may have been more important than we even realize.

My question.. is the time for gay "pride" parades past or will there always be a place for them? Curious.

dfrourke saidNEXT!!!!

I believe we have beaten the horse to death...

That horse is so dead by now it's Alpo.

Apparently that horse did not die in the beating! I say we stake her, chop her head off and burn her maybe this way she will stay dead!

If you don't like Gay Pride or Parades then don't go! No one id forcing you.
I also feel that you should not share in the fruits of our labors either!

There is a reason why Gay Pride exists. A lot of you kids do not know nor would you ever know what the Gays and Lesbians have to suffer through for Gay pride. But you have no problem going to a theme party. With muscle boys with their shirts off drunk and full of drugs.

If it wasn't for Gay Pride or the Parades those parties would not exist!

KNOW YOUR HISTORY! This kind of Posts really pisses me off.

HndsmKansan said
My question.. is the time for gay "pride" parades past or will there always be a place for them? Curious.

This is a good question, and here's my answer:

This may not apply to kids today who are coming out and starting to learn about love and sex and dating in the same time frame as their straight peers, but for those of us whose coming-out was later, there are several things that happen early on. One is that your adolescence winds up beginning, in effect, when you come out. Some men, sadly, never leave that phase, and the rest of their lives they act like hopped-up teenagers. But for most of us, it's a phase. We do what normal kids do--learn about ourselves, what we want out of sex and romance, and learn who we might see ourselves having a future with. We test-drive a lot of men (some of us, anyway) and eventually if we're lucky, find the keeper. This is what straight people do, and it's normal.

Second, if we've felt oppressed or isolated enough, we may seek out gay ghettos to live or work in. Not because we need them for safety--I think that time has largely passed---but because it provides an environment where it is not remarkable to be gay. After years of pretending to friends and family, of compulsively keeping quiet about whom you're seeing or lusting for, of feeling a little odd even around your straight friends when you talk about sex or love or dating, the gay ghetto provides an environment where everyone is doing what you're doing, and you can at last talk and think freely.

For a lot of men, that's a phase too. Once you get to a certain point in your life, you don't care one way or the other, you've been "normalized", so to speak, and that need for it may disappear.

Pride parades are another form of surrounding yourself with so many people just like you that it can feel empowering. When we older guys talk about them as having been some sort of relic of times gone by, we may not realize that for us they are no longer necessary, but for some young gay man finally experiencing his freedom, they serve the same purpose for him that they did for us once upon a time.

dfrourke saidNEXT!!!!

This issue has been discussed in three other forums before...and I believe we have beaten the horse to death...

http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/301214/

- David

Three? Try closer to 300, and that was just within the last six months.

This is a topic that was discussed with great emotion just a few weeks ago. It has been discussed by gay men ad nauseum since the first pride parades were held over a generation ago.

For me pride parades can be fun and inclusive, especially for those that are just coming out. However, there will be some participants who try to stretch the envelope of what our society considers acceptable behaviour in public. Some people (gay and straight) are turned off by such behaviour, others enjoy it or tolerate it.

In Toronto the police turn a blind eye to the more "out-there" behaviour (example women going bare-breasted) since the pride parade participants are very well behaved, as opposed to other festivals in which people are shot and killed.

hey guys, i do apologize, i did not know other threads were already started on this topic,
and to ducky45, a couple things:
you are right, no one is forcing me to go, but what happens there is forced on me and all gay people by people's conclusions of who they think gay people are (here's where you say it shouldnt matter what other people think, to that i say bull, it always matters what others think, no man is an island) furthermore, i have never been, nor do i plan on ever going to a theme party with half naked men full of drugs, so there goes that argument

Boston.

As you get older you will learn not to care what orthers think trust me.
If someone is not feeding me, clothing me, paying my bills.
I just don't care what you think! I will never give anyone that kind of power.
Why should I care what some random straight person thinks of me.
In terms of the theme party I was not speaking to personally it was a generic statement because you aren't the only that wish gay pride would go the away of the T-Rex.

thats just it, i think gay pride parades should continue, just without the sex and half naked (sometimes fully naked) dancing men, i just want us to adopt a more formal, g-rated, respectable parade

bostudent87 saidshow me a gay person who does their job and contibutes to society,

There are many floats stuffed with regular guys who contribute to society at London Pride. There are quite a few at Belfast Pride as well.

That is just one aspect to gay pride. I don't know what kind of Gay Pride you all have in Boston. In California, Los Angeles for sure there is the Parade of course, then in the park there is usually the festival with booths with all of sorts of organizations set up giving out information to become more active in the Gay Community do they not have that in Boston?

They have booths set up for Gay men and Women in Law Enforcement and Fire Fighters, for some they may not have know that there is a Gay Men and Women Chorus and they just found out that is and how did they find out by attending Gay Pride.

If you did away with Gay Pride then you loose that kind out reach which is pivotal. Before you get on a soap box wanting to do away with gay pride because you are so conservative in your thinking and how you thik Gay Men and Women should behave, take along look and consider what we would be loosing if you had your way.

Have you even been to Gay Pride at all? It seems like you are stuck on one aspect of Pride? That part that media puts on television. It appears the lens that you are looking through is very narrow.

Just like the West Hollywood Halloween festival the media only airs one aspect of it.

I don't mean to sound rude, but I don't think you read what I just said, so I will say it again: "i think gay pride parades should continue, just without the sex and half naked (sometimes fully naked) dancing men, i just want us to adopt a more formal, g-rated, respectable parade" so yes, i agree with you that they should continue and that they are good ways of spreading knowledge and meeting people, you are making an arguement to keep gay pride parades going, I am making an argument to keep certain content out of them

bostudent87 saidI don't mean to sound rude, but I don't think you read what I just said, so I will say it again: "i think gay pride parades should continue, just without the sex and half naked (sometimes fully naked) dancing men, i just want us to adopt a more formal, g-rated, respectable parade" so yes, i agree with you that they should continue and that they are good ways of spreading knowledge and meeting people, you are making an arguement to keep gay pride parades going, I am making an argument to keep certain content out of them

But, see, it isn't UP to you. Pride parades aren't about YOUR self-expression, valid though that may be. They are about the self-expression of EVERY participant, a great many of whom think your ideas are narrow.

Young man I understood what you said. TRUST ME. You don't get it.
Maybe you should re-read your orginal post.

You Wrote:

"why can't we broadcast something we are proud of, show me a gay person who does their job and contibutes to society"

They do have this during Gay Pride sweetie. That why I wrote what I wrote.

I don't see there's nothing wrong with it , when there are half naked men during gay parades.
I believe they entertain the crowd, and make the parades more fun. Who cares if other people who are not gay and bisexual have stereotypes about gay and bisexual people and that they like to do threesome etc. What about them , heterosexual people do all kind of stuffs, they cheat on their spouses, they do group sex , threesome, they sleep with this and that etc .

dfrourke saidNEXT!!!!

This issue has been discussed in three other forums before...and I believe we have beaten the horse to death...

http://www.realjock.com/gayforums/301214/

- David

i haven't gotten my licks in as yet so...

I think we need to remember that the community should be big enough for us to accept those who are more flamboyant than we are. If it wasn't for some of these types we would all still be in the closet.

I'm done now

ducky, you're right, you're absolutlety right, i did say that, but I meant it in the context that that alone is what we should be celebrating, i don't know, i guess i just think that, this is the only parade we have to represent ourselves and I dont like how, in some parades, sex wins

ps: i never said we should get rid of pride parades, thats why i said you should read what i wrote, i did not "get on a soap box wanting to do away with gay pride"

I think they do more damage than good.

I don't think they have shown the world anything other than: fuck you we do what we want! Is that really the message, the world really want to get? Considering so many say they want acceptance?

They don't represent us all, nor talk for us all either.

Think of the impact they would have if instead of everone in making it look like it's nothing more than a public orgy, if they all put on their work cloths, surly this would show diversity. We are not one, nor all the same.

You won't meet me at one.

I remain undecided on whether gay pride parades have a positive impact on the gay community at large or if they are becoming obsolete relics from the recent past. I think we have debated this topic in other forums and everyone has their own opinion. There is no point arguing this topic anymore. Next topic please.