Gay polygamy - how would that work when BOTH parties can each have a few husbands?

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    Apr 16, 2009 1:31 PM GMT


    This came up in another gay marriage thread. We're curious. If a guy can have, let's see....three husbands and each of those husbands can have three husbands each and each of those husbands can have three husbands each etc etc etc, doesn't that end in one gigantic interconnected marriage? In such a case, would marriage mean anything at all? (In straight polygamy, only the man can have more than one wife. The wife cannot have more than one husband. So much for equal rights.)

    Or is this a case, in proposed gay polygamy where only ONE of the couple was allowed to have more than one husband? Sounds lopsided in that case. Even unfair.

    Who inherits from the spouse? In a single interconnected marriage involving hundreds or thousands of men, would they each inherit a dollar? What about division of assets etc in a divorce?

    When this was brought up, we asked the the person that advocated gay polygamy how it would work and can his two husbands also have more husbands. The reply was a question: can each of us, Doug and Bill, have more husbands. Well, d'oh. We're in a monogamous marriage - not polygamy.


    Gentlemen....?
  • UncleverName

    Posts: 741

    Apr 16, 2009 4:50 PM GMT
    The only way for the whole thing to work is if you share husbands.
    That makes everything so much easier. However you choose each of those husbands together, is up to you guys icon_smile.gif

    And divorce would be a total pain in the ass. I say that if multiple husbands are ever allowed, then divorce from a multi-partner relationship should be completely illegal. Either that, or there should be no legal implications to marriage in general.
  • Salubrious

    Posts: 420

    Apr 16, 2009 5:04 PM GMT
    meninlove said
    (In straight polygamy, only the man can have more than one wife. The wife cannot have more than one husband. So much for equal rights.)


    No, that is incorrect http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygamy.
    You're thinking of Polygyny http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny. Polyandry (one woman and multiple men) also exists, though it is not as common http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyandry

    *the more you know star shoots across*

  • rnch

    Posts: 11524

    Apr 16, 2009 5:16 PM GMT
    why would anyone, male or female, gay or str8, want MORE than one husband? icon_lol.gif
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    Apr 16, 2009 5:32 PM GMT
    Oh dear...
  • DrewT

    Posts: 1327

    Apr 16, 2009 5:45 PM GMT
    Salubrious said
    meninlove said
    (In straight polygamy, only the man can have more than one wife. The wife cannot have more than one husband. So much for equal rights.)


    No, that is incorrect http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygamy.
    You're thinking of Polygyny http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygyny. Polyandry (one woman and multiple men) also exists, though it is not as common http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyandry

    *the more you know star shoots across*



    Well said.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 16, 2009 5:47 PM GMT
    Hmmm, sounds like a circuit party to me.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 16, 2009 7:20 PM GMT
    Isn't this just an open relationship by another name?
  • Tiller66

    Posts: 380

    Apr 16, 2009 8:12 PM GMT
    Well you know that crazy things like that is one of many things that is used against gay marriage.
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    Apr 16, 2009 8:15 PM GMT

    Oh my lance, my life is enough like a soap opera as it is,
    without having a gaggle of husbands.
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    Apr 16, 2009 9:16 PM GMT
    Another tread just for me.

    Well they are my two husbands, they are committed to meicon_biggrin.gif They don't take another husband as their commitment is to meicon_biggrin.gif
    They are not committed to each other, as they have made a commitment to meicon_biggrin.gif

    Now I'm not the kind of guy who would use a peace of paper like marriage to take ownership of another person, that would be slavery.

    Neither of my two men, were forced to be with me, or to stay with me, but one has chosen to stay with me for 20 years, and I just celebrated my 10th anniversary with my second husband.

    Two men committed together, it's just marriage.

    Us <3 together, now this is "gay marrage."

    I could not understand why homosexuals were calling marrage between two men gay marrage, when all it was is marrage.

    To me what us <3 have, is now coined Gay Marrage. From this moment on, this is what I promote as Gay Marrage. Poligammy is for straight men what have more than one wife.

    I am a pure homosexual! Never had a wife. But.....have two long term relasionships. So this is Gay Marrage.

    I think of all you guys who struggle to keep one relasionship going. Yet I have two long term relasionships goingicon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 16, 2009 9:17 PM GMT
    it just doesn't seem fair to those of us who can't find even ONE man to commit and love reciprocally, that others out there are hoarding collections of men for themselves icon_evil.gif
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    Apr 16, 2009 9:19 PM GMT
    czarodziej saidit just doesn't seem fair to those of us who can't find even ONE man to commit and love reciprocally, that others out there are hoarding collections of men for themselves icon_evil.gif


    We can love eachother now move to ny damn it hehehehe
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    Apr 16, 2009 9:25 PM GMT
    jprichva saidGuys, you're going to have stop listening to the idiocies that fall out of Pattison's mouth. Srsly.


    Being sanctimonious again.

    Did your mom not teach you that: people who live in glass houses should not throw stones?

    Unlike you. I have lived my whole life as a pure homosexual. I have never taken a wife, to hid behind, and pretended to be a heterosexual. That ended in divorce, and now you complain you can't find a man, who will stay with you, yet I have two; build a bridge and get over it.

    I'm not living a lie as you have. I'm very open about having two great and wonderful men who truly love me! Who are also committed to me!

    Or is that the root of your issues. You can't find one man to commit to you?

    Not my fault, nor my issue.

    Oh I think you may also need to counseling for anger management too, because you do have issues and you love to take em out on me.

    Oh say G'day to the wife and kids for me tooicon_wink.gif
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    Apr 16, 2009 9:26 PM GMT
    MadeNUSA saidIsn't this just an open relationship by another name?
    No it's gay marrage.
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    Apr 16, 2009 9:50 PM GMT
    czarodziej saidit just doesn't seem fair to those of us who can't find even ONE man to commit and love reciprocally, that others out there are hoarding collections of men for themselves icon_evil.gif


    You know something matey. Life is not fair.

    I've read here at RJ. Guys bitching how insensitive straight, and bi people are who have the right to marriage, yet so many homosexuals don't. Not their fault.

    Just as it is not my fault that I've been so blessed, to have met two men who have been happy to commit to me long term.

    Did you know that homosexuals not even born in my country Oz, have more rights here, than I do a True Blue Aussie, who just happened to also be born a homosexual. They can wed their one. Yet I have no such equal right to wed my two.

    How insensitive of them.

    But I had to wait for my one, then second to come alone. it just did not happen. But it's an interesting storey of how it all come to pass.
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    Apr 16, 2009 9:58 PM GMT
    rnch saidwhy would anyone, male or female, gay or str8, want MORE than one husband? icon_lol.gif


    So you can understand how a father, mother, brother sister, would ask of their gay son, brother, mate, why would any male let another male do that to himicon_lol.gif Oooooh
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    Apr 16, 2009 10:04 PM GMT
    chungo44 said
    czarodziej saidit just doesn't seem fair to those of us who can't find even ONE man to commit and love reciprocally, that others out there are hoarding collections of men for themselves icon_evil.gif


    We can love eachother now move to ny damn it hehehehe


    haha im game- you're gonna have to wait a year for me to graduate though... come here in the interim lol icon_cool.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 17, 2009 7:34 AM GMT
    I don't particularly care how people structure their romantic relationships. Live and let live.
  • Sebastian18

    Posts: 255

    Apr 17, 2009 7:44 AM GMT
    I know I brought this up in the previous thread about "polygamy", however the word I'm under the impression that there's a general misinterpretation between the idea of polygamy and polyamory. There's a fine line between the two however I think the latter can and does work - speaking from previous personal experience.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyamory

    Granted, it may not be for everybody, but it's good for those of use who want to be committed but still have variety.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 17, 2009 8:26 AM GMT
    ^ And yep pointed out the same thing before. Polyamory is NOT Polygamy.

    Polyamory is consensual, while Polygamy is more often the results of cultural practices (like in Islam or Mormonism).
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    Apr 17, 2009 1:30 PM GMT


    Well now, thanks Pattison, we really wanted to know if this type of relationship was balanced - or not.

    You said, "Well they are my two husbands, they are committed to me They don't take another husband as their commitment is to me
    They are not committed to each other, as they have made a commitment to me"

    So, basically you're allowed to collect more husbands but your husbands can't? What happens if one of your husbands wants more husbands? Do you divorce him? Your husbands aren't committed to each other? So what would happen when you pass away? Without a commitment to each other the marriage is over?

    You said, "Us <3 together, now this is "gay marrage."

    We completely disagree. Some mormons, among others, already do this and it's they're not gay.

    You and both of us know that what makes a marriage gay or not is entirely based on its participants.

    Thanks for the heads-up Salubrious!


    This has been pretty educational, and we'd like to thank Pattison for participating and giving a few straight answers.

    respectfully, us