Do you think there is a potential reltionship/future with a guy who sleeps with you on the first date?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 3:07 PM GMT
    icon_lol.gifI'm just curious... I have seen my friends try to sqeez and force a 'relationship' with guys they meet and screw on the first date/meeting and see it crash and burn. I was just wondering if you guys have had better luck? I don't like to be a Debbie Downer and lacture my friends about putting out ont he first date... they are grown men and can do whatever whoever they like. I just don't wanna feel like i'm being a 'hater' if there has been situations where something great has developed from a first date fling.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 3:15 PM GMT
    Just because there's an obvious physical connection doesn't mean there's something there worth pursuing. but yeah... it can happen. I hit the sack with my current bf on our first date. 7 months later and we're still together. Granted we had been communicating via e-mail/text/phone for about a month until we actually physically got together.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Apr 22, 2009 3:20 PM GMT
    I don't think anything can be colored as absolute... there are some people that may have talked on the phone/ texted, etc for some time before they actually meet in person and feel they "know" the person enough to sleep with them. They've done the background, etc.

    That can be much different than someone you meet at a bar, are attracted to them, go home and screw them. Um did you get their name?

    Preferably there would be a period of time that transpires before you do it all
    (and it does happen), but I would say more times than not, by about the 3rd date, if the gay couple continues, theres going to be sex.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Apr 22, 2009 3:57 PM GMT
    It's sometimes hard to take a step back from the jumping right into bed everytime you see each other
    But that doesn't mean that it's impossible
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 4:04 PM GMT
    It's pretty much a case by case basis or person by person. With one of my exes we did that and we were coupled for about year. It really depends on if both people are in the same head space.

    We just knew we wanted to see each other again. We only split up because his job transfered him across the state. I just was not ready for that kind of move.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 6:47 PM GMT
    i've only had one bf, and to be honest, we had been talking online for a long while, so i knew him, but met him in on newyears.. and well lets just say he got more than a new years kiss. A month later we sorta made it official.. and it didn't last too long since long distance, but i still talk to him all the time, and consider him to be someone i'll always care for and be close with.

    But i don't think it's the best idea to sleep with a guy before getting into a relationship with them
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 6:50 PM GMT
    I went 6 years with a guy who put out on the first date, 3.5 years with another and a year and a half with another.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 6:54 PM GMT
    10 years, sex on first date. We couldn't wait for dinner to f*ckin' get done.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 7:00 PM GMT
    The best relationship I've had the sex didn't happen until about two months in. That didn't mean an incredible amount of groping went on...haha.

    My last relationship, we went on a few dates and there wasn't even a kiss, and there's was a terribly weird tension during that time. The night of our first kiss though, he moved right in for the belt buckle. I remember thinking, yknow, woah, maybe we should step back for a second.

    I think it's a person-by-person thing. I always feel like I'll have a better relationship when I know them quite a bit before we hop in the sack together. I feel a lot more appreciated as a person then. Rather than just being someone to sleep with, I'm someone that is cared for.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 7:15 PM GMT
    my partner and i had sex on the first date, and we've been together over 11 years and counting.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 7:18 PM GMT
    yes
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 7:18 PM GMT
    9 years with a hook up that turned into a 14+ hour date. Everything fell into place. There are no rules or perfect scenarios. Every situation and individual are different and need to be treated as such. I've played by the no sex on a first date rule and have had it crash and burn faster than anything.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 7:29 PM GMT
    Definitely!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 7:33 PM GMT
    Maybe it's a new generation, but I just don't get all these rules...e.g., no kiss on the first date, no sex 'til the third date; no fucking 'til 6 months into the relationship. My partner and I had sex on the first date, the second date and the third date...I couldn't begin to tell you how far into the relationship we were before we were together a whole day without sex! And that was almost forty years ago, and we're still going strong...well, maybe not as strong as the beginning, but you get the idea. If you want to have sex with the guy, DO IT! I don't know why sex has to screw up the potential relationship (pun intended).
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 9:42 PM GMT
    Listen to your big head and not the little one. The sun will rise tomorrow either way. If it's the real deal, take your time..or your right hand.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 9:47 PM GMT
    Well to me, two people should know each other and become good friends before they sleep with each other. I guess i am old fashion and wouldn't sleep with someone on the first date. If I wanted to start a relationship with that person, then i would want to get to know him first and become good friends. Yea i know some of you are going to bash me for that, but thats my philosophy and morals and i will stick to them.
  • code_joe

    Posts: 107

    Apr 22, 2009 9:54 PM GMT
    Both of the people i've had LTR's with I slept with on the first date. But both times I wasn't looking for anything more than just a one night stand. It seems I come into relationships when I'm not looking for them.

    The first time I was with him for 3 1/2 years and left because of differences, though we are still friends. The second time lasted for 2 years and ended on not so good reasons ... as in one of my recent posts icon_sad.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 10:01 PM GMT
    There is no yes or not to this question. It either happens or it doesn't. You can't predict or expect either to happen. Just roll with the punches and see how things play out.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 10:10 PM GMT
    at least you will already know if youre sexually compatible which is very important in any healthy relationship.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 10:10 PM GMT
    absolutely
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 10:52 PM GMT
    Waiting with the sex you can weed out the trophy hunters, as someone who's interested in you long-term would wait for the sex to happen.

    That said, bf and I had sex before we exchanged the first word, a hook-up on a beach and we've been together 15+ years
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 11:03 PM GMT
    F*ck Yeah!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 11:21 PM GMT
    What guarantees that just because one guy doesn't want sex on the first date, he's not already having it with his other possible hookups?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 11:28 PM GMT
    yo_mamali saidJust because there's an obvious physical connection doesn't mean there's something there worth pursuing. but yeah... it can happen. I hit the sack with my current bf on our first date. 7 months later and we're still together. Granted we had been communicating via e-mail/text/phone for about a month until we actually physically got together.


    QFE (im in the exact same situation, only at 3 months not 7 icon_cool.gif )
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 22, 2009 11:32 PM GMT
    Anything is possible.
    It has happened