Oddball dates you've had, and guys you've known

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2009 12:15 AM GMT
    There's another current RJ thread about dating psychos (psychotics). But how about merely eccentric & unusual guys, some off-the-wall stuff you've run into? Don't have to be sickos, just out of the ordinary, and preferably amusing.

    I posted this one already, but repost it here to start things. About an eccentric guy who remains my friend today, maybe because "it takes one to like one." LMAO!!!

    As we woke up after our first night in bed, he sheepishly confessed to me that he wasn't 42-years-old as he had claimed, but actually 52. I started to cry, and he mistakenly thought I was upset.

    I explained I was crying for joy, because I was 54 myself, liked him very much, but had been afraid I was too old for him. I said my waking up to find him to be really 52 was like some kind of miracle had happened overnight, because I prefer men close to my own age, and I continued crying for quite a while. I can be such a pansy! LOL!

    But then he directed me that I had to always tell everyone that he was 42. Well, OK, I could do that, even though he was an old-looking 42.

    Next he said he was working with a doctor so he could live to be 160 years old. Of course that's impossible at present, and when I expressed doubt he bluntly told me that I had to accept that as a fact, or we couldn't ever be friends. I decided to humor him further.

    A little later he snapped at me for having corrected him about something. He explained that from the age of 13 he had declared that no one could ever correct him. If I criticized or doubted him in any way, about anything, I could never be his friend. This was another novelty for me, but I decided out of mischievous curiosity to let it pass, and see what would develop.

    It took about a year before he started to let me criticize him freely, and now he invites me to do it all the time, saying I'm his best and most trusted advisor, though we are no longer boyfriends.

    He still insists he will live to be 160, but I no longer care, so long as he is happy. He also continues to lie about his age, which has become a joke, since everyone who knows us both says I look younger than him, despite my being nearly 3 years older, my own age being no secret. And no one believes he's still in his 40s.

    But I let all this pass, because I do love him, and admire him, and he is my friend. Maybe I'm as eccentric as him? LOL! Know any guys like that?
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    Apr 25, 2009 11:52 AM GMT
    jprichva saidI guess the one about the paraplegic who tried to hypnotize me into falling in love with him would count here?

    Not sure, that might belong in the other thread about the psycho lovers. Post it here and let's see. icon_wink.gif But I did once run into a guy who thought he had special psychic & healing powers.

    We met at a Fort Lauderdale bathhouse, and spent the morning and part of the afternoon naked together, mostly lounging around the outdoor pool, alternately swimming, with spells in the hot tub, occasional trips into their huge faux-cave steam room for a BJ or hand job, and eating a very elaborate poolside buffet with a guy in full chef's whites presiding.

    (Announcement over the club's speaker system: "Gentlemen, the buffet is now open. Please wear at least a towel in the serving line." LOL! Don't want no pubes in the pasta, and that big carving knife & fork he wielded for the roast beef did make you want something between you, if only a towel.)

    My new friend had rented a changing room (I always just got a small metal locker), which had a built-in bunk, and where I learned he was a perfect bottom to my top. The room doors all had signs forbidding 2 people being inside, prolly for legal reasons, which no one obeyed or enforced. I mean, for what reason do you find a fully-made bed in a changing room?

    By mid-afternoon we were spent, and agreed to grab a snack and coffee somewhere. For once I had a car, rather than a motorcycle, so we drove over to Las Olas Blvd, where all the trendy shops & cafes were in Fort Lauderdale, and still are today. We took an outdoor table on the sidewalk and had pastries & lattes.

    He began to elaborate on his being a psychic-spiritual healer or some such thing, that he'd mentioned back at the bathhouse, and gave me a business card for it (no place for business cards before when we'd been bare-ass). Then he grasped both my hands tightly across the table, and told me he could sense my need for healing.

    "The power of Christ heals you!" he suddenly pronounced very loudly. "The power of Christ compels you!"

    "The power of Christ will make you well again! The power of Christ heals you!" He voice was rising, his eyes fixed hypnotically on me, and people sitting around us where beginning to take notice.

    I became very uncomfortable, and wondered how I could stop this public spectacle that featured me. His grip on my hands was now very tight, so that I felt a tug of war to escape would do no good, and merely draw more unwelcome attention to us. I tried to softly & calmly interrupt him with distracting questions about the method he was using, but I couldn't break the trance he seemed to be in.

    After what seemed like forever he finally stopped his droning mantra. He told me I would feel better now, though in truth I thought myself fortunate not to have burst a blood vessel. I quickly finished up and we parted on the sidewalk, since he lived within walking distance.

    I was so furious at being put through this nonsense that I played my own little "psychic" trick on him as we said goodbye, just to upset him. It's a story for another time. I knew he only visited that bathhouse on Saturdays, so I avoided that day for the balance of my extended stay in Florida before heading back home, and I never saw him again.
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    Apr 25, 2009 12:13 PM GMT
    I would have just fucked him. I know this will be cut and pasted, but who cares? I would have just fucked him. BAM, bend over, we have some business to do. Unlike allot of guys, I have no problem with sex. I would have done it with him right there and right now. OK that is just me..
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    Apr 25, 2009 12:23 PM GMT
    Triggerman saidI would have just fucked him. I know this will be cut and pasted, but who cares? I would have just fucked him. BAM, bend over, we have some business to do. Unlike allot of guys, I have no problem with sex. I would have done it with him right there and right now. OK that is just me..

    I would have done the same thing myself, provided it was in the semi-public setting of something like a bathhouse, as in the story I posted above. I already had uneasy feelings about that spiritualist guy I mentioned, but if you're all running around naked with stiffies already, who cares?

    But otherwise I'd agree with jprichva, and I would have fled. This is the kind of potentially unbalanced guy you don't wanna mess with in private, for any purpose. Let him rape & pillage Wall Street, but not me.
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    Apr 25, 2009 12:35 PM GMT
    No offense, but your critique of me would hold a bit more weight if you did not hide behind the red vespa. But you choose to, so be it.

    People are not stupid. For what it is worth. He makes statements but is afraid to stand behind them. He is Red Vespa. WOW Make a statement and have the balls to stand behind it. Do not be a coward and be afraid to show your face. No!! I am Red Vespa! I never show my face but I make statements and I want people to listen to me but I am afraid to show my face.

    Is Pussy a word?
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    Apr 25, 2009 12:42 PM GMT
    I will debate anyone. Anyone. But, I will not debate guys like Red Vespa anymore. I have fought too long and too hard to help these wannabees anymore. I will debate openly gay men that are willing to debate. But I will no longer assist guys like Vespa to stay in the closet and let the rest of us fight for him. If he is too cowardly to come out, so be it. But I will not assist him anymore. Fuck him, in the vernacular.
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    Apr 25, 2009 12:49 PM GMT
    In my 20's, the years of clubs and staying up all night, my friends and I would invite people back to our homes for all night/ morning chat sessions. Coffee and breakfast served.

    We ended up one night, with this guy named Hammer. He looked like a character out of a fantasy comic book. Very dwarfish looking.

    He was an artist, and said he lived on a commune outside the city and that he actually dug his home in the ground (he had it all fixed up) and I remember, he ascribed to the Gay Fairies philosophy on life. We were all fascinated by him, and asked him question after question about his life.

    The really cool part was that he said, in all the years of coming to this after hours bar, he had never once been spoken to because of his odd looks. He was blown away that we invited him back to our homes.

    It was very touching/important moment for my group of friends, especially since at that time in our lives we were obsessed with surrounding ourselves with the best looking club boys. We are so past that type of snobbery now. LOL!

    P.S.- Red Vespa is not in the closet. Hello! It's a very cute picture, original.
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    Apr 25, 2009 12:58 PM GMT
    Triggerman saidI will debate anyone. Anyone. But, I will not debate guys like Red Vespa anymore. I have fought too long and too hard to help these wannabees anymore. I will debate openly gay men that are willing to debate. But I will no longer assist guys like Vespa to stay in the closet and let the rest of us fight for him. If he is too cowardly to come out, so be it. But I will not assist him anymore. Fuck him, in the vernacular.

    I'm guessing Triggerman got his threads confused, and is responding to a political one that Caslon started about Torture Trials, to which I also contributed. But it is early, especially on the US West Coast where Triggerman lives, so I suppose we should make that allowance.

    But as long as this pair of angry comments is appearing here, I'll just observe this is a typical example of the Republican tactic of attacking the person, in order to avoid the actual issues.

    BTW, I'm not sure what closet Triggerman thinks I'm in. I am totally out in my community, and a major contributor to gay charities, especially HIV/AIDS (my name listed online at several gay non-profit sites for my considerable work, my name on a brass plaque at one of them). I've led numerous gay pride parades, my pic is frequently in gay pubs, and my other gay credentials are lengthy.

    I'm also a retired US Army Colonel of 25 years service, so comments about cowardice, whether military or gay, are unfounded. I would like to believe this is some kind of misunderstanding or mistake, because I bear no resemblance to the individual Triggerman describes.
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    Apr 25, 2009 1:20 PM GMT
    jprichva saidI was still chewing my salad.

    LOL! And prolly a good salad -- I remember the MOMA cafe. Have you been there since the major renovation in late 2004? I visited in Jan, 2005, when they still featured an exhibit about the architect. Frankly, I thought a warehouse has more style & artistry.

    I'd have to classify that as a bad date, not an oddball, despite the great odds of what happened to you. Fate has done funny things to me on dates, too, stories for other times...
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    Apr 25, 2009 1:20 PM GMT
    JP, that's hilarious....and could be the beginning to one of those long-shot romance movies....You could be played by Hugh Grant....and how 'bout Julia Roberts for the lawyer? Hey, what's Sandra Bullock doing these days?...

    (Pitch to Lifetime?)
    ;-)
  • irishboxers

    Posts: 357

    Apr 25, 2009 1:30 PM GMT
    Went on a date with a guy once who seemed nice enough, pretty attractive, but after he told the second story that ended with "and then they threatened to call the police on me" I decided there wouldn't be another date...

    Then there was the guy who showed up drunk...

    And the guy who decided to try to pierce his nose at the table, during the date, because he liked the way it looked on the waiter...

    Hard to believe I don't miss Los Angeles. icon_biggrin.gif
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    Apr 25, 2009 1:38 PM GMT
    jprichva said They made her a partner immediately. This annoyed her fellow associates, since she skipped two classes ahead of them; it annoyed the partners in her firm, since she'd kind of put a gun to their heads...This was 8 years later, and he was still pissed. He couldn't get away from me fast enough. He got up, threw some money on the table, and left.

    As well he should. These machinations were, by law-firm standards, unforgiveable. What about the fate of the associate(s) who got booted out due to your client's end run around the 8-or-out rule?
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    Apr 25, 2009 1:42 PM GMT

    One guy was gorgeous to look at, but couldn't converse beyond "that's cool, man!".

    Another guy let me take his pants off, but not his shoes...

    I struggled to come up with those...
    Ah the sheltered life I've lead...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2009 1:52 PM GMT
    irishboxers saidWent on a date with a guy once who seemed nice enough, pretty attractive, but after he told the second story that ended with "and then they threatened to call the police on me" I decided there wouldn't be another date...

    Then there was the guy who showed up drunk...

    And the guy who decided to try to pierce his nose at the table, during the date, because he liked the way it looked on the waiter...

    Hard to believe I don't miss Los Angeles. icon_biggrin.gif

    OMG, those are wonderful! (meaning awful) I've had a couple dates start to tell me about their prison time for drug possession, which was time for me to leave.

    But actually, the majority of my dates have been just fine, these exceptions were just that. Don't wanna scare-off our younger guys with horror stories. Just to immunize them against the occasional oddball, and how to recognize & handle him.
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    Apr 25, 2009 7:26 PM GMT
    No real oddball dates come to mind. I did start dating someone who seemed like a quality guy - well educated, well employed, lots of good things about him until I found out how much time he was spending with his ex. That was fine with me, really - he assured me they were "just good friends". What ended things between us though, was when he had the unmitigated gall to get mad when I declined his request to loan money to his "just good friend" to buy a condo in Phoenix. He thought I was selfish. My contention was that he should consider buying the condo himself for his "just good friend".
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    Apr 25, 2009 8:00 PM GMT
    Some miscellaneous oddball situations I've encountered:

    - a guy who wouldn't go to nice restaurants with me, even at my expense. He'd only go to inexpensive places, mostly fast-food, and only where he had a discount coupon to use. No coupon meant no meal, and the coupon he had determined where we ate. It's nice to save money, but really...

    - another cheapskate, who never bought new clothes for himself. Everything he wore came from yard sales and thrift shops, even his underwear. Four years after we broke up he was still wearing my own old boxers I had given him. And the guy had more money than me...

    - one guy broke up with me for another, but we remained friends and in contact. Then he decided the new BF was cheating on him. Half the time when we'd go out for drinks, to keep in touch (no sex), we'd be in his car when he's suddenly start "shadowing" another car on the road, convinced it was his cheating BF inside with someone. I'd be fussing that we were gonna get arrested for stalking or worse.

    Inevitably we'd end up over at the BF's house, where he'd set up a "stake-out" to watch the place, to see who was going in and out, or sometimes we'd be outside local motels, where he believed his BF was meeting other guys. I'd be fuming that I'd had enough, to take me home, and HE'd get mad at ME for not cooperating. I'm still amazed we were never arrested, and we never did catch the BF anywhere, doing anything.
  • jgymnast733

    Posts: 1783

    Apr 25, 2009 9:15 PM GMT
    Met this dude in the club who was fuking fine,,so i asked him if he wanted to dance,,so we got on the dance floor and he started throwing a hankerchief up into the air then catching it,,,over and over...icon_eek.gif
    So i turned around and left his dumb ass there...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 25, 2009 9:33 PM GMT
    I met a guy on gay.com, chatted for about two weeks before he made plans to fly his own plane up from Sacramento - hot.

    He arrived, got a hotel room (nice assumption that we weren't gonna shack-up) and I said I'd take care of reservations at a nice place Downtown Portland - hot.

    He arrived, I picked him up from the hotel and we went to dinner. Great cocktails, incredible food, good conversation - hot.

    Finished dinner and invited him to my place. He said he worried about his dog (flew up with him) and was locked in the hotel room. I offered to drop him by and pick her up, but he said he had to fly back early the next morning - understandable, but not hot. I took it as a polite "no."

    Got home, showered, changed, crawled into bed and slept for an hour before a text message at 12:10 am that said, "I am wearing only a towel, sitting in my room and waiting for you." I wrote back, "You had your chance. I too have an early morning. Thanks for the date!"

    I wasn't surprised I never heard back from him. I just thought it was a lot of effort for mixed signals.

    Certainly not psycho, but an interesting learning experience for me.
  • dannyboy1101

    Posts: 977

    Apr 25, 2009 10:31 PM GMT
    Dated a 27 yr old attorney (I was 24 or 25 at the time). Guy was always at least an hour late (even if I gave him an earlier time to make us show up at the same time, he was somehow psychic and would show up an hour after the time I was showing up). Bought so much high end fashion, yet lived at home on the south side of Chicago with his brother and parents. Seriously, get some cheaper shoes and start paying rent!