Proud,Glad, Excited, Thankful to be gay?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 5:07 PM GMT
    I'm curious how many of you feel this way? Before I came out, I felt like being gay was this awful curse and burden that was going to cast an ugly shadow over my whole life. After I came out I found myself in the middle of the dance floor and numerous other times proclaiming "Thank God I'm gay!" with my other homo bros. It gives you incredible freedom to live your life outside of the "norms". I've even had straight friends say they were jealous of the fun and freedom associated with the out gay world. P.S. I'd be interested in knowing if your out or not when you respond to this.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 5:34 PM GMT
    proud, glad, exited, thankful ?... none of them
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 5:57 PM GMT
    I just am who I am...being gay is not my identity, its just part of who I am.
  • Bunjamon

    Posts: 3161

    Apr 26, 2009 6:00 PM GMT
    wadawg saidI just am who I am...being gay is not my identity, its just part of who I am.


    That's how I feel, too, for the most part. It doesn't change who I am, really. I am proud of it, though, I don't have anything to hide and I'm not ashamed. But thankful? It certainly doesn't make life any easier, so I can't say I'm thankful.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 6:07 PM GMT
    No pressure to get married, no need to have kids, no great pressure to show interest in other people's kids, open, healthy attitudes to sex and relationships, there are so many great things about being gay.

    I look at my miserable married friends, with their horrible kids, terrible jobs and no flexibility to change any of it. I look at my single female friends who pine for relationships and marriage. I look at my single male friends who are constantly thwarted by women in their quest for sex. I'm proud and thankful to be gay, for the flexibility and freedom that it offers.

    I'm out of the closet.
  • dannyboy1101

    Posts: 977

    Apr 26, 2009 6:07 PM GMT
    I'm thankful that I can act on my own emotions and thoughts without being jailed or executed like in some other places in the world, but I can't really say that being gay is something I wake up in the morning and jump for joy over. It's another way of life with its own ups and downs just like being straight. Just like any other social group, there are individuals to be proud of (innovators, heroes, artists, etc.) and there are individuals that make me not want to have even a common label with them (the most recent man-child I've dated, the newest queen barebacking in back alleys and bathhouses, the numerous addicts that are slowly killing themselves out of self-induced homophobia). You just can't generalize like that.

    I will say however that I am thankful for being gay simply so I don't have to deal with any of the pressures of "when are you getting married?" and "when are you having kids?"
  • drakutis

    Posts: 586

    Apr 26, 2009 6:11 PM GMT
    It's who I am. Can't change it now! I'm THANKFUL to be me! I'm PROUD to be ME! I'm always EXCITED TO BE ME!

    The End
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 6:18 PM GMT
    Makeyoumyne's response is exactly how I feel and kind of what I'm curious to see if any one else is feeling.
    " No pressure to get married, no need to have kids, no great pressure to show interest in other people's kids, open, healthy attitudes to sex and relationships, there are so many great things about being gay.

    I look at my miserable married friends, with their horrible kids, terrible jobs and no flexibility to change any of it. I look at my single female friends who pine for relationships and marriage. I look at my single male friends who are constantly thwarted by women in their quest for sex. I'm proud and thankful to be gay, for the flexibility and freedom that it offers.

    I'm out of the closet."

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 6:40 PM GMT
    lol, i remember the day i hated gay people when i was in jr high school (what was i thinking!), my parents, church, everywhere i went i always heard "gay people are sins and they are going to hell".But all that time, i was gay myself, i was ashamed of myself, i hated myself. But when i finally admitted and accepted myself, my whole world changed. It made my life less complicated, and i love myself. yes gay too. wouldn't change it if i had the chance to turn str8.
  • Hunter9

    Posts: 1039

    Apr 26, 2009 7:00 PM GMT
    definitely thankful... not having to deal with women is an incredible privilege that my straight friends will never be able to understand.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 7:03 PM GMT
    Proud, Glad, Excited, Thankful to be gay?

    Proud-I am who I am and hopefuly growing everyday. Yes.

    Glad-I always joke with my hetero counterparts that it is so much easier, it seems, to be gay. None of the stress of the long held preconceived notions of getting married right away, having the a son and a daughter to carry on the family traditions, etc. While being gay has its own set of issues, I can't say I would want to go to the other side. So Yes.

    Excited-Not necessarily about being gay, but excited about life. So, in a sence,Yes.

    Thankful-It is a part of who I am and I think given the times we live in, it has been an added ingredient to help build my character, for the better, making me stronger. Yes.

    And I am completely out.

    Suffice to say:

    Interracially mixed by Birth,

    Gay by God,

    Proud by Choice!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 7:04 PM GMT
    it would be easier to be straight thats all im saying....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 7:06 PM GMT
    explorer saidI'm curious how many of you feel this way?

    I do, and I've written about it many times over the last 14 years since it happened. But for slightly different reasons than you describe for yourself.

    I honestly didn't know I was gay. Oh, likely somewhere deep down inside at some level I knew, but not at the conscious level. I was convinced I was straight, and I believe this created an inner conflict that made me miserable, and led me to make many poor decisions, and not enjoy life.

    Then one day I came out, all at once, publicly & unreservedly (hence the movie quote in my RJ Profile). The background story is lengthy, not for here, but it happened in a single flash.

    And when it did I began to cry, in pure joy & happiness. Because I knew at once this was the missing piece to my life's puzzle, the answer to many questions, the secret that was going to make me happy at last. And it has.

    I am all those things you list: proud, glad, excited, and thankful to be gay at last. My only regret is that I was too stupid to know it sooner, that led me to make many mistakes, that hurt not only myself, but others. Like women to whom I innocently presented myself under false pretenses.

    And to answer your final question, I am outer than out, despite the slanders of a certain RJ member who's obsessed with the privacy precautions I take with my Vespa online main photo. I live every day gay, very gay, very out, very much trying to make up for the 30 lost years of my straight detour.

    But at least incredibly happy at last, with a partner and all the love in my life I never had before. I'm glad you're experiencing the same thing. icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 7:10 PM GMT
    Absolutely proud and happy to be gay!!!.
    True, it would be easier to be a member of the breeder society. But I would be missing out on the physical intimacy of being with another man. Nothing compares.
    Religion and the RWCN (Right Wing christian Nazi) party is what makes it difficult for Us to be just your average everyday citizen in the U.S. (repuGlicans bloody suck!)
    Cheers,
    Keith
    icon_evil.gif
  • PRDGUY

    Posts: 641

    Apr 26, 2009 7:18 PM GMT
    icon_question.gif"Proud,Glad, Excited, Thankful to be gay?"icon_question.gif

    None of above.
    I am purely a SEXUAL person, like most who are bold enough, enjoy BOTH sexes.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 7:27 PM GMT
    exploroer -- YES I can relate to everything you are saying. I grew up in an extremely conservative religion where homosexuality is completely non-existant and unacceptable. I felt it was a terrible curse also. I moved out of my parents house at 18 because I knew that would be the only way to develop myself and just accept the fact I cannot change.

    The freedom is just amazing and it has been soooo liberating to come out. My family does not accept it but at least they know and try to respect me as a human. I am very PROUD, glad, excited, and thankful to be GAY!!

    Cannot wait for Gay Pride NYC this year in June.......
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 7:28 PM GMT
    waxon saidit would be easier to be straight thats all im saying....

    First you need to define "easier." Easier for straights to fit into a hetero-dominated world, that is often gay-hostile, yes.

    Easier to live with yourself if you're really gay, no. That was the lesson I learned through 30 years of denial.

    I actually did pretty good playing their game. In fact, I played in one of the most macho outfits they have, the US Army, and beat them at their own game, running circles around the straights.

    Indeed, more than any promotions & medals I ever earned, my proudest accomplishment is that I now realize I did it as a closeted gay man, without all their macho advantages. Or, does that raise the issue of whether such advantages even exist, or are they imaginary? icon_wink.gif

    But from personal experience I have concluded that being who you really are is the easier. I can think of few things less easy than a gay man trying to live straight. What do you gain if you manage to get along with those others, if you can't get along with yourself?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 7:30 PM GMT
    Red_Vespa... wow incredible insight and wisdom man.
  • tbeaux

    Posts: 419

    Apr 26, 2009 7:40 PM GMT
    I am very proud, glad, excited, and thankful that i love men. As gay men, we have a bit more worries about discrimination, HIV, not having same rights, and what not, but besides that we are pretty kick ass people. I don't make being gay my identity, but i love myself more than ever for it. Say it loud and proud, I LOVE MEN!!!!!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 7:42 PM GMT
    Only out to one person in real life:

    Proud? Not quite. Prouder of my accomplishments rather than what I was born with. But it does make me proud to see a gay man do something positive. Or a gay man do something today that he would never have been able to do just a decade ago because achieving equality little by little is also quite an accomplishment.

    Happier, definitely. My deep depression in my teens was caused mostly by my inability to admit to myself that I was gay and nothing's gonna change that. And yeah, the first coming out experience was one of the most exhilarating moments of my life.

    And thankful, because being part of an unjustly maligned minority has opened my eyes to the suffering of other people - be it from race, gender, beliefs, or ancestry. In a word - empathy. In a sense it has made me mature faster beyond the egotistical teenage mindset. Some people never outgrow that stage.

    Excited? Not really. icon_sad.gif *starts learning knittage, or knitting, or whatever the hell it's called, in anticipation of spinsterhood*
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 7:48 PM GMT
    Absolutely happy, proud, glad, excited. Even if this was a choice - this would be my choice. I've tried the other team (women) and had a few - some real beauties - but guys are my preference - all the way!

    Just remember the line that goes: A man needs a woman just like a fish needs a bicycle!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 8:14 PM GMT
    I guess I would say proud, but not because I'm gay. I'm proud because I'm ME.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 8:16 PM GMT
    There have been times when I've been on both sides of the fence. Some days I love that I'm gay, love the fight for equality, love the love that I feel. But there are those days, and I guess we probably all have them, when I'm nothing but down and out about the struggles we tend to go through. There are less rules in the gay community, and while that can be liberating, it can make it so much harder. With no single pass on solid ground, we're all forging ahead on on our own sometimes.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 8:18 PM GMT
    yes, very proud to be out. Married even to my husband (Go Marriage laws in Massachusetts!) I do find it very freeing and love the flexibility it gives me!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Apr 26, 2009 9:43 PM GMT
    Sedative saidOnly out to one person in real life:


    And thankful, because being part of an unjustly maligned minority has opened my eyes to the suffering of other people - be it from race, gender, beliefs, or ancestry. In a word - empathy. In a sense it has made me mature faster beyond the egotistical teenage mindset. Some people never outgrow that stage.

    Excited? Not really. icon_sad.gif *starts learning knittage, or knitting, or whatever the hell it's called, in anticipation of spinsterhood*


    I agree with the thankful part, but I would guess that if you didn't live so far away your chances at "spinsterhood" and subsequent need for "lessons in knittage" would be remote. I'm sure there's a few guys out there that would see to that.