what do you think of man who denies that he's gay, (eventhough you have all the reasons to believe that he is)?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 28, 2009 12:10 AM GMT
    everyone has the god-given previledge to choose, but to choose not to believe something which has proven itself to be a fact is denial.
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    Apr 28, 2009 12:49 AM GMT
    luismaco saideveryone has the god-given previledge to choose, but to choose not to believe something which has proven itself to be a fact is denial.


    This happened to me once when I was living overseas. I met this football (soccer coach) who happened to be the coach of the national team. Anyhow I thought he was gay. I approached him, but he claimed he wasn't. To make a long story short. I moved on. But two years later our paths happened to cross again. He tried picking me up, thi stime. I made a date with him: and then nicely let him know on the date, that we had met and he had told me wasn't gay. He turned red.... sputtered... tried to come up with some lame ass story.




  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 28, 2009 12:56 AM GMT
    luismaco saideveryone has the god-given previledge to choose, but to choose not to believe something which has proven itself to be a fact is denial.


    I think you should spend more time worrying about yourself and less time concerned with other people's business...
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    Apr 28, 2009 12:57 AM GMT
    If he is, then I feel sorry for him. If he isn't, and either way, it's really none of your business!
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    Apr 28, 2009 12:59 AM GMT
    tommysguns2000 said
    luismaco saideveryone has the god-given previledge to choose, but to choose not to believe something which has proven itself to be a fact is denial.


    I think you should spend more time worrying about yourself and less time concerned with other people's business...


    it's a forum. duhh...
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    Apr 28, 2009 1:03 AM GMT
    Unless you really care about the guy and want to help him out of the closet and out of his clothes, it's none of your business.

    If he knows you're gay and doesn't come clean you don't want to be around him and if he isn't gay, tell him he needs some lesbian friends to butch up. icon_wink.gif
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    Apr 28, 2009 1:04 AM GMT
    For whatever reason he is still in the closet and he will come out when he is good and ready.If i were you i would mmob and if he finally does come out be supportive.
  • TallSoCal

    Posts: 321

    Apr 28, 2009 1:04 AM GMT
    It's not your place to drag someone out of the closet. They'll come out when they're ready, and if they don't, that's on them. Either way, it's not hurting you any.
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    Apr 28, 2009 1:12 AM GMT
    It's his business not yours.
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    Apr 28, 2009 1:16 AM GMT
    guys im asking this to gather personal opinions and not for any personal puspose...icon_sad.gif
  • Webster666

    Posts: 9217

    Apr 28, 2009 1:18 AM GMT
    Maybe he meant that he wasn't happy...
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    Apr 28, 2009 1:22 AM GMT
    Be patient. It took me awhile to come out and even when people said they were totally comfortable with it, I wasn't. Try to be supportive and give him space.
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    Apr 28, 2009 1:24 AM GMT
    luismaco said
    tommysguns2000 said
    luismaco saideveryone has the god-given previledge to choose, but to choose not to believe something which has proven itself to be a fact is denial.


    I think you should spend more time worrying about yourself and less time concerned with other people's business...


    it's a forum. duhh...

    you should still spend less time worrying about how other people wish to be.. because, its none of your business..

    or maybe, he just doesn't want to sleep with you.. maybe he doesn't feel any need to say he is gay.. maybe he doesn't want too yet.. maybe he couldn't give a shit.. maybe you need to get a life..
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    Apr 28, 2009 1:26 AM GMT
    luismaco saidguys im asking this to gather personal opinions and not for any personal puspose...icon_sad.gif


    And you're getting personal opinions. Maybe it's just they aren't the ones you want to hear. My opinion as I said before is that it's his business and not yours. You have no right to know why or why not he identifies as straight, gay , bi or even vegisexual. The only time it becomes your right to say something is when he engages in anti-gay speech, actions or politicizing in the light of incontrovertible evidence that he is in fact gay.
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    Apr 28, 2009 1:28 AM GMT
    lilTanker said
    luismaco said
    tommysguns2000 said
    luismaco saideveryone has the god-given previledge to choose, but to choose not to believe something which has proven itself to be a fact is denial.


    I think you should spend more time worrying about yourself and less time concerned with other people's business...


    it's a forum. duhh...

    you should still spend less time worrying about how other people wish to be.. because, its none of your business..

    or maybe, he just doesn't want to sleep with you.. maybe he doesn't feel any need to say he is gay.. maybe he doesn't want too yet.. maybe he couldn't give a shit.. maybe you need to get a life..


    im only asking people opinion about the matter, i'm not putting this question on this forum because of a specific person. geezz take it easy...
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    Apr 28, 2009 1:31 AM GMT
    Yea, this has happened to me once. I just forgot about it after a while and gave the man distance, especially since he didn't really seem cool with the idea that I thought he was gay. If someone isn't ready to come out, that is there problem. I am thankful that I did because now I can be happy by accepting myself for who I am, if they don't want to do that, then there is nothing I can do to help the poor soul.

    Forget about it, move on with your life, that is my theory on it.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Apr 28, 2009 1:32 AM GMT
    luismaco saidim only asking people opinion about the matter, i'm not putting this question on this forum because of a specific person. geezz take it easy...
    then why would anyone care?? its none of our place to force homosexuality onto someone despite how you may judge them.. You've no idea whats going on inside there head.. so.. your question is useless..
  • jgymnast733

    Posts: 1783

    Apr 28, 2009 1:49 AM GMT
    Are you kidding, i know alot of dudes who still claim to be str8 that i'v slept with. IF thats how they chose to define themselves then so be it...
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    Apr 28, 2009 1:57 AM GMT
    icon_rolleyes.gif For you (or anyone) to look at another person and make a judgment about their sexuality and then to accuse the person of being in denial because they do not concur with your judgment is utter arrogance. A person’s sexual preference and how they define their sexuality, is strictly their own business.
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    Apr 28, 2009 2:05 AM GMT
    Huh! I thought all gays were Homosexual Headhunters. We get a bounty for each one we bag, don't we? At least that's what I've heard we do, preached from pulpits and on conservative talk shows, so it's gotta be true.

    Just like military recruiters, we have a quota to meet, or we risk our Gay Card if we fail to meet it. I've been dodging the issue for a while now, but I fear the knock on the door from Gay Recruiter Command (GRC) any day now.

    It's so unfair living in South Florida, where half the men are gay already. How do you recruit from that? And these bad economic times don't help, either. Nobody has the discretionary income to be gay anymore. How are you guys coping with your own obligation?
  • silverfox

    Posts: 3178

    Apr 28, 2009 2:05 AM GMT
    Perhaps....he is not gay?
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    Apr 28, 2009 3:03 AM GMT
    It's his choice how to live. If he wants to be in denial then that's his choice. If we started policing peoples denial it would not stop at gay people. When he is ready to deal with it he will.
  • MSUBioNerd

    Posts: 1813

    Apr 28, 2009 3:11 AM GMT
    Just because you believe something doesn't make it true. Most of us have worse gaydar than we think we do.

    That being said, there's someone I know who I'm convinced is gay, although he says he's straight. At least 75% of our mutual acquaintances also think he's gay, and have asked him about it. Either he's the gayest straight man I've ever met, or he's a closet case. It really doesn't matter, as I have no interest in dating him. Unless it's someone you're trying to date, whether or not a guy is in the closet really isn't any of your business.
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    Apr 28, 2009 3:57 AM GMT
    That's why threads should never beging with a statement, they bring trouble. Big big trouble! icon_surprised.gif

    hmm, I need a banana....
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    Apr 29, 2009 5:22 AM GMT
    jprichva said
    GuerrillaSodomite said vegisexual

    You mean like that gal who liked to cram yams up her ass?


    Well, I was thinking about various squash and melons, but I guess yams would work too.