daddies and boys. 40s + 20s

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 05, 2009 4:32 AM GMT
    Ok here is my question. Is it possible for a somewhat older male in his late 40s early 50s to have something real and in common with a younger guy 20s -30s? In the gay realm can there be a lasting relationship with persons from two separate age groups? What could they possibly talk about? I sometimes wonder if the older gent would end up starting to treat his young lover like his son which is creepy. I sometimes imagine myself in that scenario and wondered what could possibly establish such a union. let me hear you thoughts.arandy1.jpggp0131p0038.jpg
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    May 05, 2009 5:48 AM GMT
    icon_eek.gif lol...i guess! i get younger kats all da time, but i never ever make them feel comfortable. I dont know why i do it...lolicon_lol.gif
  • Anto

    Posts: 2035

    May 05, 2009 6:36 AM GMT
    Yeah I think it's possible just depends on the people doing it.
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    May 05, 2009 6:44 AM GMT
    It is totally creepy if/when the older partner treats the younger like his son - it is equally creepy if/when the younger partner treats the older like his dad. This has happened to me - and it creeps me out and puts me off right away. I think relationships where the partners are significantly different in age can work - its all about love, respect, compromise, communication - all the stuff of any fulfulling relationship.
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    May 05, 2009 6:51 AM GMT
    I don't think I know of a 17-year-old gay boy who wouldn't have jumped Gale Harold (the guy who plays Brian Kinney). I know I would have. Hell, I don't know why I'm speaking in past-tense. icon_razz.gif Lol.

  • May 05, 2009 6:57 AM GMT
    well, for me, I dont think it would work... i've dated an older guy before, and even though he was academically ambitious in his day, as i am right now, there still wasn't a strong level of understanding of the result of such pursuits (as well as because the fact we were in SUCH different stages in out lives..

    BUT then again, I'm only 20! Not even old enough to legally drink, i'm still in school, i have a job, but dont have a career. Being 20 and 25 is a really big difference (not necessarily more mature though). Just that life experience gap between a 25 year old and a 30+ is a lot smaller than with a 20 year old.. year old is And maybe i wasn't (and still not) fit for a boyfriend because i already have to balance the class load of two full time students, a job, making sure of quality friend time, and doing the things that make sure I do the things that make me "look good" for grad students.

    Then again, that was only one guy... I really think it depends on where both people are in their lives. At least the younger one should be out of college and i their career for a lil. I think tehhat will make a huge difference.

    sorry... a little rambly.. just my 2 cents
  • NursePractiti...

    Posts: 232

    May 05, 2009 8:31 AM GMT
    My last bf and I started dating when he was 25 and I was 37. Were not together now because of differences, but for that time we were madly in love and I dearly miss that part of our relationship. Fortunately, I have his friendship and were still close. Yes it can work, but you must be equals. Although I understand some people are into the daddy son thing and if it works for them, well good for them.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 05, 2009 9:15 AM GMT
    It works well the first night, then fizzles out, altogether.
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    May 05, 2009 9:25 AM GMT
    Ummm yeah.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 05, 2009 9:26 AM GMT
    Tapper saidIt works well the first night, then fizzles out, altogether.


    Not unless it spills into the morning. icon_biggrin.gif
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    May 05, 2009 12:44 PM GMT
    You get back from a relationship what you put into it. An age difference is certainly a factor with more potential for negative than positive. So if you're putting that into a relationship...you're likely going to have to work harder than you might with someone your own age. But that's a generalized statement/assessment. There will always be individual cases that break the norm.

    I should add that as someone who just spent a few months dating someone 8 years my junior...I don't recommend it. He even had a better job/made more money than me. But in the end, he still had/has a lot of growing to do that I've already done.
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19129

    May 05, 2009 1:07 PM GMT
    It's like any relationship, both parties have to be willing to work through the issues that could potentially tear the relationship apart if you let it. The older we get the more equipped we become to see the true value of a "love connection" when it happens and nurture it.
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    May 05, 2009 1:09 PM GMT
    Berberknight1.The younger guy shouldn't treat his partner as a senile man ready for the nursing home.


    Haha, especially if he's only 40 icon_wink.gif

    Cue: lots of hot pics of 40 year olds.

    BradPitt2.jpg
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    May 05, 2009 1:39 PM GMT
    As Mae West and/or Sophie Tucker once said, and frequently practiced: "20 goes into 40 (60, 80...) and whole helluva lot more often than 40 (60, 80...) goes into 20. We daddies can just sit (lie back or front) and do the math! icon_cool.gif
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    May 05, 2009 1:48 PM GMT
    FierceEyes saidI don't think I know of a 17-year-old gay boy who wouldn't have jumped Gale Harold (the guy who plays Brian Kinney). I know I would have. Hell, I don't know why I'm speaking in past-tense. icon_razz.gif Lol.


    YO! SO WANNA BANG HIM!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 05, 2009 2:10 PM GMT
    dad_phixr.jpg

    Dan Payne, from the new Gay-interest Film Mulligans.

    So yes.

    Case closed.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 05, 2009 2:25 PM GMT
    what the hell kind of ageist question is this????
    you damned kids... when are you going to learn?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 05, 2009 2:43 PM GMT
    like any relationships survival chances....
    It depends on the marturity level of the two people involved and like all relationships it takes committment and effort.
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    May 05, 2009 2:43 PM GMT
    SAHEM62896 saidwhat the hell kind of ageist question is this????
    you damned kids... when are you going to learn?

    Probably when you stop treating me like crap Sahem! I'm an ADULT! WAH!

    But in seriousness, having not ever had a relationship with age disparity, I couldn't really imagine myself getting into one. I mean, sure there are some guys in their late 30's that I have flirted with and have crushed on, but I didn't seriously think that I would be getting in a relationship with any of them. I dunno. Who knows. I've seen stranger relationships survive, so I'm not surprised that a relationship between older and younger people could work.
  • calibro

    Posts: 8888

    May 05, 2009 2:48 PM GMT
    I definitely think it's possible.Just look at the story of Christopher Isherwood and Don Bachardy.
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    May 05, 2009 2:48 PM GMT
    Sahem-

    They don't think that they will be our age one day! The question is pretty deep. It speaks to the mind of author of this post, who thinks those of us who could be his father, should feel like we have hit the LOTTERY since he has humbled himself to share the same air as us, let alone be in a relationship. Don't flatter yourself kid!icon_eek.gif

    PLEASE!
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    May 05, 2009 4:54 PM GMT
    Ducky45 saidSahem-

    They don't think that they will be our age one day! The question is pretty deep. It speaks to the mind of author of this post, who thinks those of us who could be his father, should feel like we have hit the LOTTERY since he has humbled himself to share the same air as us, let alone be in a relationship. Don't flatter yourself kid!icon_eek.gif

    PLEASE!


    your soo wrong..i dont think like that in fact i don't think age should matter if you find a connection with someone no matter the gap, hence me asking for your thoughts on the issue. Do not attempt to analyze me especially if you do not know me. thank you.
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    May 05, 2009 5:07 PM GMT
    Makes for great sex :-) and chances are that is all that both really want!
  • swimbikerun

    Posts: 2835

    May 05, 2009 5:07 PM GMT
    Damn kids! Get off on my lawn!
  • CAtoFL

    Posts: 834

    May 05, 2009 5:11 PM GMT
    ... and onto mine. icon_lol.gif