What do you guys think about selfish sex...?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 5:20 PM GMT
    I'm a bottom, and what I'm specifically referring to is when a partner (not a bf) uses your mouth and ass for his pleasure, comes, then leaves the room to clean himself up, pretty much saying "go ahead and finish yourself off." This has happened to me a few times. What's up with that? Is that a common thing for tops to do (because it's annoying)? I have no problem pleasuring you, but if you don't want to stick around to help me climax, I think that's pretty fucked up. Am I just getting the selfish tops or do I lend myself to that sort of behavior for being submissive? Respectful opinions appreciated.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 5:50 PM GMT
    1) Stop sleeping with ass holes.
    2) Tell your tops what you want and if they don't give it, don't put out.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 6:01 PM GMT
    I tend to agree with Munching, but there are people who enjoy being treated that way. I guess it takes all sorts.
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  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 6:06 PM GMT
    I think if you've pleasured someone, it's their obligation to pleasure you in return, or at least make the effort.

    There have been plenty of times at the bath house when I've been with a guy, and I've cum first, and I usually stick around to help him finish (if that's what he wants).

    With my BF, I wouldn't DREAM of not sticking around to give him some lovin' after he's done so for me.

    So, D, if you're reading this, the shower is waiting, and so am I!
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    May 11, 2009 6:08 PM GMT
    I'm all for it, especially if it was good for me icon_biggrin.gif










    ...just kidding, time to drop this guy.
    Tell him his domination fixation would better served with his dick in his fist and on his own time. icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 6:23 PM GMT
    Yeah I think the guy should at least make the effort. It's one thing if it happens on occasion, but if it's a reg thing... Try talking to him about it and if that doesn't work, to the left to the left,mmmm. Seriously though, you shouldn't have to tell him. He should know.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    May 11, 2009 6:30 PM GMT
    I have a hard time getting off if I know the guy I'm with isn't enjoying it. There's been times where I've gotten lost in how it feels when I'm topping that I can't cum.
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    May 11, 2009 6:33 PM GMT
    Well considering the caliber of sex you are having, can you complain? If you don't want to be treated meaningless, don't have meaningless sex. If you want more, demand more. By the way, an outstretched foot is all it takes to teach a fleeing tric a nasty lesson.

    In another thread, I said communication is key in most settings. Many gay men seem to expect their partner/sex partner to know by mind reading what they want.

    Communication works with the waitress at your favorite bistro (if you don't tell her no mayo.....), and this works with the grocery store bagger (apparently he needs reminding that the eggs don't go under the 12 pack of ginger-ale). Good communication works in most situations so why would you then consider crawling into bed with somebody (partner or tric), and not give the poor man an idea of what you want?

    Tell them and be just as selfish as they are being. Stick to your guns and make yourself clear that you want what you want or they won't get what they want. If during the sex, you're not getting what you want.....you have the right to stop the sex, get dressed and leave or if it's your place, tell him to get the fuck out. If he doesn't listen, call the cops.....oh lord, i'm gonna get you hurt. icon_surprised.gif

    ...................................................

    What you are describing, I avoid by telling the person, "Hey, i'm a sensitive vers, I need you to show a little compassion, need you stayin for a while....basically treat me like a gentleman. What do you know, they do it (on the rare instances I have sex....cause it ain't often icon_mad.gif).

    If you are thinking most dishonorables will just lie. Don't underestimate dishonorable men: how can they succesfully avoid a concept they don't fully understand. Ofcourse, sometimes that can just be owed to ignorance. You'll be surprised to ask a man the questions you need too and how forthcoming he'll be, basically telling you "no, I don't care if you get off, i'll leave when i'm done," and then grin expecting you to swoon because he's so sexy you should jump at the chance.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 6:40 PM GMT
    You need to find a top with stamina...

    honestly, some guys shouldn´t be allowed to top icon_rolleyes.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 9:59 PM GMT
    I agree w/Munching... If it's not gonna be mutual then he don't get any either...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 10:01 PM GMT
    I remember once, when I was working a booth at the Long Beach Pride Festival, there was a lesbian who was part of our volunteer group. She was actually crass enough to brag about how cool a "top" she was because she expected any woman she had sex with to get her off, and then, and I quote, "After I come, I don't care if she's done or not. If she wants some more attention from me, I just tell her to jack herself off, and I go do something else."

    I must admit, I was really stunned at that one. Thought it was pretty shitty attitude.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 10:02 PM GMT
    depends on the type of submissive..

    I've had guys who just lay there doing nuffin.. or try too, even I can't be bothered doing anything then.. not for them and not for me.. *shudders*
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    May 11, 2009 10:18 PM GMT

    lilTanker saiddepends on the type of submissive..

    I've had guys who just lay there doing nuffin.. or try too, even I can't be bothered doing anything then.. not for them and not for me.. *shudders*


    I'll give you heart attack, ok? I've got the moves and the equipment to do that, ok.

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    May 11, 2009 10:19 PM GMT
    GuiltyGear said
    lilTanker saiddepends on the type of submissive..

    I've had guys who just lay there doing nuffin.. or try too, even I can't be bothered doing anything then.. not for them and not for me.. *shudders*


    I'll give you heart attack, ok? I've got the moves and the equipment to do that, ok.

    Oh I am all for timely demise during sex.. I think that would be the best way to go!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 10:20 PM GMT
    GuiltyGear said
    lilTanker saiddepends on the type of submissive..

    I've had guys who just lay there doing nuffin.. or try too, even I can't be bothered doing anything then.. not for them and not for me.. *shudders*


    I'll give you heart attack, ok? I've got the moves and the equipment to do that, ok.

    I.........













    I thought we had something special.







    *runs away crying*
























    *breaks a heel*
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 10:20 PM GMT
    you should always ask this before you have sex.."are you a selfish lover"?
  • Klutch84

    Posts: 286

    May 11, 2009 10:21 PM GMT
    @iwantmoore, why don't you just cum first and bounce after you've busted your nut? They aren't worried about pleasuring you and getting you off because to them, you're just a jump-off. You're not someone they're trying to date and make into a lifelong partner, so they smash and move onto the next.
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    May 11, 2009 10:31 PM GMT
    Funkapottomous said
    *breaks a heel*


    Your girlfriend is going to kill you for wearing her clothes again, funkapottomous. icon_razz.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 10:33 PM GMT
    GuiltyGear said
    Funkapottomous said
    *breaks a heel*


    Your girlfriend is going to kill you for wearing her clothes again, funkapottomous. icon_razz.gif

    OOOH did he get caught wearing her panties.. I remember the message I got about those icon_eek.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 10:35 PM GMT

    ....that wasn't him...that was me. icon_redface.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 10:39 PM GMT
    GuiltyGear said
    ....that wasn't him...that was me. icon_redface.gif

    and I bet you looks fabulous in them!

    Did they have any little bows?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 10:54 PM GMT

    No, they were sleek and sexy, sheer, ya know.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 10:58 PM GMT
    GuiltyGear said
    No, they were sleek and sexy, sheer, ya know.
    rawr icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 10:59 PM GMT
    your his sex toy..so divorce him now...unless you like this treatment and his ???icon_evil.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    May 11, 2009 11:25 PM GMT

    mistic_man saidyour his sex toy..so divorce him now...unless you like this treatment and his ???icon_evil.gif


    We are talking more than one he. giggle smiley Pictures, Images and Photos