STILL VIRGIN..... !!!! GOOD OR BAD????

  • heyman

    Posts: 48

    May 15, 2009 6:33 PM GMT
    COLORED TEXT GOES HERE

    July 30 im turning 20 AND IM STILL VIRGIN... lol my friends... that i suposed are my friends laugh of me because that.... some times i feel like in a hurry because i need to lost my virginity... but at the same time... i wanna find the right person i guess....

    any ways... any advise????
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    May 15, 2009 6:52 PM GMT
    If you wanted to just get laid and get it over with, you would have by now. Not everyone views sex the same way and just because you're a gay man doesn't mean you have to view sex something as trivial as a handshake. Have sex when you're ready with who you want, and don't worry about what other people think about it.
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    May 15, 2009 7:11 PM GMT
    The right person will eventually (have hope) come but you can lose that person if your inexperience becomes a turn off or you become clingy. Trust me on this!!! An inexperienced lover is a one nighter.

    Get laid have fun, wear a condom. LIVE!

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 18, 2009 2:34 PM GMT
    Who cares if your still a virgin, it only means one thing, that you dont have anything (STDS), you will eventally find the right one, just need to look a little harder.
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    Jul 18, 2009 5:18 PM GMT
    Absolutely Good.

    Considering the practical matters is one thing as MorningKid and hector2009 said.

    But, you might also want to make that first time meaningful, at that's a one shot in life thing. That not necessarily means you got to find prince charming or "the one" to go for it, but as Timberoo said, if you just wanted to get laid you would already done so, so just think about your reasons and look for the right situation and the right guy and good luck!
  • Delivis

    Posts: 2332

    Jul 18, 2009 6:13 PM GMT
    Nothing entirely good or bad about it, such nebulous generalizations are no good.

    Stop worrying.
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    Jul 18, 2009 6:57 PM GMT
    heyman saidJuly 30 im turning 20 AND IM STILL VIRGIN...

    How do define virginity? I gave my first blowjob about 3 weeks after I came out of denial, which I consider the end of my gay virginity. I topped about a month later, but didn't bottom until about 6 more years after that. I think any sexual activity with another man terminates your virginity. What have you done?
  • jrs1

    Posts: 4388

    Aug 25, 2009 4:01 PM GMT

    right. I'm not sure if it's appropriate to say ' good or bad ' so much as to say that it is a choice that some have made. if you're a virgin, good for you. if you have enjoyable, safe sex ... good for you as well.
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    Aug 25, 2009 5:57 PM GMT
    I had sex at 18 (less than a year ago) and I thought that was a long time. It didn't happen how I wanted the first time but it was fun regardless. I don't regret it either and ever since then I feel a lot more free to just have sex now since I got it over with.
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    Aug 25, 2009 8:12 PM GMT
    Mr. Right wont come around. There are Mr. Rights on every street corner, depending on what you are looking for. So don't wait for anybody.

    This isn't about other people, this is about you. You should have sex when you are good and ready, not a moment sooner and hopefully not too long after. Keep an open mind. Don't let it get to you (a lot more people are in your boat than you think). And when you do, for the love of god play safe.

    Maybe you don't have to start off with full on ass-cherry popping sex. Maybe you and a friend jerk off together and make out. Maybe you just start off with a little oral sex. Warm up to enjoying your sexuality with other people.
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    Aug 26, 2009 10:45 PM GMT
    Being a virgin still at 20 is not a bad thing - it means you haven't find the right guy yet. First time is always a special occasion to remember - I lost mine when I was around 22 - so give it about 2 more yrs before you can go all Slutty? hehe Jk. icon_redface.gificon_biggrin.gif
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    Aug 28, 2009 8:21 PM GMT
    MunchingZombie saidMr. Right wont come around. There are Mr. Rights on every street corner, depending on what you are looking for. So don't wait for anybody.

    This isn't about other people, this is about you. You should have sex when you are good and ready, not a moment sooner and hopefully not too long after. Keep an open mind. Don't let it get to you (a lot more people are in your boat than you think). And when you do, for the love of god play safe.

    Maybe you don't have to start off with full on ass-cherry popping sex. Maybe you and a friend jerk off together and make out. Maybe you just start off with a little oral sex. Warm up to enjoying your sexuality with other people.


    Great advice!

    First off, don't let the pressure get to you one way or another. Don't let it pressure you into something, or pressure you to not do something. Make the choice based on what is in your heart. And focus on your heart, not your cock. Cocks make very poor life choices. Then again, if the right guy comes around, don't hesitate too much or the right opportunity will pass you by. It is a judgement call. But it is YOUR judgment call, not anyone else's.
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    Aug 29, 2009 6:05 AM GMT
    Well, don't feel too bad because I'm almost 30 and still a virgin. I don't think I'm a bad person inside or out. Just too shy and chicken to come out, and don't want to hook up on CL.

    Good luck.
  • zakariahzol

    Posts: 2241

    Aug 29, 2009 6:24 AM GMT
    It better to remain a virgin than to follow some stranger home and get yourself sexually abuse against your will. I do that at 19 and that how I loss my virginity. Dont do the mistake that I did, get to know him first before you do anything that your might regret latter. I was lucky that he dont kill me and buried me in some shallow grave.
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Aug 29, 2009 10:03 AM GMT
    Do you truly feel like you're missing something inside?

    If the answer is yes to that ... then go ahead then and grab the first piece of ass you can find
    But if you're happy then I'd suggest stay the virginal male you are now
    You're 20 there is Plenty of time to figure out what you want in life and what you want in a sexual partner
  • Koaa2

    Posts: 1556

    Aug 29, 2009 12:03 PM GMT
    I think 30 is a little late to still be a virgin. If you are so shy to meet people maybe it is time to get into some sort of gay support group or individual therapy. There must be a lot of gay support in San Diego, just try and find it.
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    Aug 29, 2009 2:25 PM GMT
    Koaa2 saidI think 30 is a little late to still be a virgin. If you are so shy to meet people maybe it is time to get into some sort of gay support group or individual therapy. There must be a lot of gay support in San Diego, just try and find it.


    Maybe not so much shy, just afraid to come out I think. I have friends, work, and do the things that everyone does. I was just raised in a very traditional family; just venting on a forum until I can muster the courage one day. :-) Other than that, I'm fine. I'm not hiding in the house all day or anything (no jokes about the closet please). Thanks for the advice though.
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    Aug 31, 2009 5:35 AM GMT
    heyman saidCOLORED TEXT GOES HERE

    July 30 im turning 20 AND IM STILL VIRGIN... lol my friends... that i suposed are my friends laugh of me because that.... some times i feel like in a hurry because i need to lost my virginity... but at the same time... i wanna find the right person i guess....

    any ways... any advise????


    I came out when I was 13.

    I didnt bottom till I was around 22/23. (I consider that gay virginity).

    Take your time. Youll know when you are absolutely ready. icon_smile.gif
  • Nayro

    Posts: 1825

    Sep 30, 2009 2:05 PM GMT
    I know how u feel, I'm 20 too and have the same ;)
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    Sep 30, 2009 6:34 PM GMT
    heyman saidCOLORED TEXT GOES HERE

    July 30 im turning 20 AND IM STILL VIRGIN... lol my friends... that i suposed are my friends laugh of me because that.... some times i feel like in a hurry because i need to lost my virginity... but at the same time... i wanna find the right person i guess....

    any ways... any advise????


    Be proud of being a virgin, and don't let anyone make you feel bad for being one. If they make fun of you then it's because they prob regret their first time and want you to do the same so that they can feel better, or they are insecure and need to get laid in order to make themselves feel better and feel wanted. Instead of laughing at you, they should be happy that you're waiting for the right one. Maybe you should rethink your choice of friends...
  • mondo_trasho

    Posts: 89

    Oct 06, 2009 6:28 PM GMT
    I didn't lose my virginity until I was 23. Then along came my slut phase, hah! No regrets, I learned what I wanted from a relationship from what I didn't like about my one night stands, and I picked up some tricks (no pun intended) along the way!
  • Melos

    Posts: 264

    Oct 08, 2009 3:37 AM GMT
    Didn't lose mine until 22 and my BF was 24 when he lost his back in the day. Definitely no need to rush into things.