Golf terms for the beginner...or experienced player

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 10, 2007 12:25 AM GMT
    A straight fraternity brother that I golf with annually sent me this batch of new golf terms:

    Golf has given us some unusual and colorful terms to describe shots such as - "shank",
    "chilly-dip", "duck-hook", "worm-burner", etc. Here are some new ones to add to
    your vocabulary:

    (1) A "Paris Hilton," an expensive hole

    (2) A "James Joyce," an impossible read

    (3) A "Rock Hudson," looked straight, but wasn't

    (4) A "Cuban," needed one more revolution

    (5) An "Elton John," a big bender that lips the rim

    (6) A "Lou Gehrig," a dead Yank

    (7) A "German," a hookenfucker

    (icon_cool.gif An "Adolf Hitler," two shots in the bunker

    (9) A "Saddam Hussein," from one bunker straight into another

    (10) A "Yasser Arafat," ugly and in the sand

    (11) A "Kate Winslett," little bit fat but otherwise perfect

    (12) A "John Kennedy, Jr.," didn't make it over the water

    (13) An "Elephant's Ass," it's high and it stinks

    (14) A "Rodney King," over-clubbed

    (15) An "O.J. Simpson," got away with it

    (16) A "Princess Grace," should have used a driver

    (17) A "Princess Di," shouldn't have used a driver

    (1icon_cool.gif A "George W.," steadily fading

    (19) A "condom," safe, but didn't feel very good

    (20) An "Anna Kournikova," looks great, but unlikely to get a result

    (21) A "Brazilian," shaved the hole

    (22) A "Rush Limbaugh," too far to the right

    (23) A "Nancy Pelosi," too far to the left
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 10, 2007 1:38 AM GMT
    icon_lol.gif You know why they call it "GOLF" don't you?

    Cause "SHIT" was already taken.


    Note to Self: Apparently not the ONLY gay man in the world to dress funny and swat a ball around in frustration. icon_lol.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 10, 2007 2:05 AM GMT
    I heard three other explanations for the term GOLF:

    1. All the other four-letter words were taken, and

    2. It's FLOG spelled backwards and that's what most golfers do to their balls, and

    3. It's the ANAGRAM for the original sign on a course Gentlemen Only, Ladies Forbidden
  • MSUBioNerd

    Posts: 1813

    Nov 10, 2007 2:08 AM GMT
    That would be an acronym, not an anagram. ;)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Nov 10, 2007 2:19 AM GMT
    Yes, dear. I'm used to saying that since I've been partnered for so long.
  • irishboxers

    Posts: 357

    Nov 10, 2007 2:25 AM GMT
    No, IT, you're not the only one. At my last count there was just short of a handful of us. Maybe a baker's dozen.

    Why more gay men wouldn't want to walk around in bright polos and shorts drinking with friends, I don't know. Sounds like an afternoon at the typical gay bar, without the deafening music. I'm sure it has something to do with the relatively conservative nature of the sport, but have you seen the younger players on tour? More metros and closet cases than you can shake a sand wedge at. Axley and Sergio, at the very least, are suspect. Those guys coordinate their outfits and accessorize like pros. ;-)

    Oh, and those terms are great. Gonna be sending those to my buddies.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 09, 2008 4:33 PM GMT
    I come from a family of golfers but probably like many of you, I rebelled against it and never got involved

    In my forties now, bought a set of clubs and looking for some buds who want to play (golf that is !) with an extreme amateur

    GWM prof 43, partnered in Fairfield Cty CT

    Send me an em

    Thanks

    Ted
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 09, 2008 4:33 PM GMT
    my picture is scary - I am not !!!
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Feb 09, 2008 4:40 PM GMT
    I LOVE Golf! It's my new thing!! Plus, driving around in those Golf carts and drinking some beers and NOT risking getting a DUI, come on!?!?!?!? HAHAHA!!

    Just kidding, but I have a new appreciation for Golfing and I am enjoying it!