Jun 11, 2009 5:23 AM GMT
Those little experiences that you seemingly missed out because you were still in the closet, or you still hadn’t come to terms with yourself yet, but that after you did you get to live them and is like heaven on Earth… that is, is still a little thing but you appreciate it oh so very much because it is so charged with so much expectation/meaning/planning/surprise/desire/…
Mine:
“I still see my High School self sitting by himself, a few meters away from the dance floor seeing this gorgeous dark young man whom I had a crush on slow dance with his girlfriend after almost an hour of wild dancing; not exactly being able to unravel the feelings inside me… of longing, of loss…”
Fast forward, a few years later in out-of-hometown college
“I remember being in the center of the dance floor and being pulled up to the scenario by this gorgeous guy and then dance and jump and sing to the crowd like we were really kings of the party and then after jumping back into the crowd he asking me whether I would let him kiss me… “
That couple of memories are part of my arsenal of mood boosters when I feel down because: I missed being sporty in high school, I didn’t get to prom with whom I might wanted, I didn’t say this or that, I did hide this or that…
I remember that while I can’t actually go back and change it, even the immediate future isn’t written yet. I find that doing this little mental exercise relieves of SO MANY negative feelings about the past and its supposed losses.
So what are yours lost and then found experiences? Or the ones you want to find? (Is completely valid to script a future one!)
Mine:
“I still see my High School self sitting by himself, a few meters away from the dance floor seeing this gorgeous dark young man whom I had a crush on slow dance with his girlfriend after almost an hour of wild dancing; not exactly being able to unravel the feelings inside me… of longing, of loss…”
Fast forward, a few years later in out-of-hometown college
“I remember being in the center of the dance floor and being pulled up to the scenario by this gorgeous guy and then dance and jump and sing to the crowd like we were really kings of the party and then after jumping back into the crowd he asking me whether I would let him kiss me… “
That couple of memories are part of my arsenal of mood boosters when I feel down because: I missed being sporty in high school, I didn’t get to prom with whom I might wanted, I didn’t say this or that, I did hide this or that…
I remember that while I can’t actually go back and change it, even the immediate future isn’t written yet. I find that doing this little mental exercise relieves of SO MANY negative feelings about the past and its supposed losses.
So what are yours lost and then found experiences? Or the ones you want to find? (Is completely valid to script a future one!)