A shallow existence

  • danisnotstr8

    Posts: 2579

    Jun 26, 2009 7:48 PM GMT


    George OrwellAt this moment the entire group of people broke into a deep, slow, rhythmic chant of 'B-B! .... B-B! .... B-B!'—over and over again, very slowly, with a long pause between the first 'B' and the second—a heavy murmurous sound, somehow curiously savage, in the background of which one seemed to hear the stamps of naked feet and the throbbing of tom-toms. For perhaps as much as thirty seconds they kept it up. It was a refrain that was often heard in moments of overwhelming emotion. Partly it was a sort of hymn to the wisdom and majesty of Big Brother, but still more it was an act of self-hypnosis, a deliberate drowning of consciousness by means of rhythmic noise.


    I've been actively blogging on this site for a couple months now.

    What disturbs me is that a simple majority of the people here are content to sit and watch the world pass them by. Some of the most popular forum topics tend to be those that garner either fruitless and shallow compliments based on looks, or those that encourage the point-and-click simplicity that seems to govern our daily existence.

    What is a Real Jock? Well, I'd say that a "jock" is an athletic guy with an aggressive approach to living. And "real?" That could mean many things. As a simple modifier, it reinforces the "jock." But I would hope that my estimation of a "Real Jock" rings true with more than one of you. To me, a Real Jock is an athletic person who does not judge frivolously-- one who takes care of himself, is concerned with the world, and who takes the time to render himself the most complete and praiseworthy person he can-- one who is on a mission to realize his potential in every way: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. He is Real.

    In the past couple days, some intense feelings have emerged from various members over several forum topics. This is one of the reasons I love this site. We get to know each other for our convictions, our senses of humor, and our passions.

    Why do these threads disappear? It's not fair. RealJock censors anything that causes a stink. And that, my friends, is why I loathe this site as much as I like it.

    Why must we censor our own passions in a forum for debate?
  • Delivis

    Posts: 2332

    Jun 26, 2009 7:56 PM GMT
    I agree. I loathe censorship.

    You dont like someone making fun of michael jackson? Then dont read the thread, block the person, whatever. You are not good enough to decide FOR ME what I can read or see. If you requested threads be removed for everyones ability to view and contribute i wish to say to you, with all due disrespect - screw you.

    This is one of the best speeches on free speech (specifically against hate speech) that i have ever seen.

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    Jun 26, 2009 10:01 PM GMT
    I doubt either of you understand the difference between an actual debate and a flame war. And Free speech does not give anyone the right to attack another person, however, it does give the right to attack an idea without being inflamatory. Over the past 48 hrs I have witnessed this OP and others do nothing but attack and fuel the flame war over the ridiculousness of so called "funny" pictures of Michael Jackson. I was not one of the ones who reported the thread, but I can see exactly why those who did would do so. I would suggest you re-read the forum rules to avoid this in the future, but I doubt it though, simply because of this thread. icon_sad.gif
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    Jun 26, 2009 10:23 PM GMT
    danisnotstr8 saidI've been actively blogging on this site for a couple months now.
    actually, to be anal, you've been posting, to a forum, a blog is another thing entirely..

    danisnotstr8 saidWhat disturbs me is that a simple majority of the people here are content to sit and watch the world pass them by. Some of the most popular forum topics tend to be those that garner either fruitless and shallow compliments based on looks, or those that encourage the point-and-click simplicity that seems to govern our daily existence.
    I'm curious what has brought you to this assumption? sure there are been many threads that are meaningless, however, not all in life need be meaningful and that sometimes, it is the things that appear the least meaningful to actually be one of the most.

    danisnotstr8 saidWhat is a Real Jock? Well, I'd say that a "jock" is an athletic guy with an aggressive approach to living. And "real?" That could mean many things. As a simple modifier, it reinforces the "jock." But I would hope that my estimation of a "Real Jock" rings true with more than one of you. To me, a Real Jock is an athletic person who does not judge frivolously-- one who takes care of himself, is concerned with the world, and who takes the time to render himself the most complete and praiseworthy person he can-- one who is on a mission to realize his potential in every way: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. He is Real.
    On this part, I think, even you fail to live up to your own ideal of what a "real jock" is, putting aside the fact that as humans we are almost completely incapable of being perfect all the time, that sometimes we do let go and release when maybe we shouldn't.

    You specially say "praiseworthy" well, your actions certainly are not praiseworthy, sure, your first post was amusing until people started getting belligerent, I don't believe it needed that sort of reaction and I think it's very sad people behave like that, however, your following threads that where posted purely to cause more trouble is not a "praiseworthy" persuit, to cause mischief and mayhem is not an admirable goal in life nor in a forum, none of your actions helped your realise any of your potential, it at most distracted you from reaching towards that goal, you played on peoples pain for your own amusement, be that right or wrong, I don't believe ir praiseworthy or adirable.

    danisnotstr8 saidIn the past couple days, some intense feelings have emerged from various members over several forum topics. This is one of the reasons I love this site. We get to know each other for our convictions, our senses of humor, and our passions.
    indeed I gotta agree, I love this place because of it.

    danisnotstr8 saidWhy do these threads disappear? It's not fair. RealJock censors anything that causes a stink. And that, my friends, is why I loathe this site as much as I like it.
    they disappear because 1 person believes them to be wholely unneeded and I'd agree with him, regardless of the taste of the original post, some threads spiral into something disgusting faster then a whore for 2 dollars.

    you don't have freedom of speech on realjock, you have one mans view and how he thinks it should be done, that is all, if he feels something should not be discussed then so be it, he is allowed to censor you in anyway he deems fit that does not stifle your liberties, however, that does not mean you may do or say as you please, since the owner can only silence you on here and you may go elsewhere to be as vocal as you wish on any topic, he isn't stifling your liberties.

    danisnotstr8 saidWhy must we censor our own passions in a forum for debate?
    having a joke about michael jackson being dead is not a passion, its a laugh, I found it funny until all the others moved in and got all rude about it, but its still not a passion.. there are thousands of threads on here where you can talk about anything, but reckless attacks, threats of violence, rudeness are not passion and it is most certainly not debate.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Jun 26, 2009 10:40 PM GMT
    RJ is a site for a passion driven jock who is totally into sports as well as those who "tread the jocky" line.. maybe interest in fitness or some sports.. but all here are interested in some sort of self improvement, myself included.

    I've been participating in the RJ forums since the fall of 2007... have read inspirational posts by men I've come to admire.. subjects that once read, have been very helpful in questions or ideas I might have on a subject....
    Some for which I was clueless.. and maybe a few I didn't have alot of interest. Some threads are funny, some maybe meaningless.. but RJ should be a mix of serious, fun, informative and maybe even shallow.. but who cares?

    I've seen flame wars.. been in the midst of several (whether I wanted to or not), always try and be reasonable, grounded.. but respectful.
    I've also seen a few threads that needed to be "trashed" and I requested their expulsion from the RJ "censors". I saw the joke making thread on MJ, but never even looked at it. If it was disrespectful.. glad its gone.

    RJ can be what you make of it...but I for one appreciate the variety of those posting, the efforts by RJ staff to improve and 99% of those who participate.
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    Jun 26, 2009 10:47 PM GMT
    lilTanker said
    you don't have freedom of speech on realjock, you have one mans view and how he thinks it should be done, that is all, if he feels something should not be discussed then so be it, he is allowed to censor you in anyway he deems fit that does not stifle your liberties, however, that does not mean you may do or say as you please, since the owner can only silence you on here and you may go elsewhere to be as vocal as you wish on any topic, he isn't stifling your liberties.


    Definitely agree with this.
  • creature

    Posts: 5197

    Jun 26, 2009 11:02 PM GMT
    I'm sorry to hear that someone sent you a death threat. There is no moral justification for that act and I hope you took the proper action.

    I don't know why your thread disappeared. I certainly didn't request it to be removed. To be honest, I'd like eventually for the threads on Michael Jackson to be inactive (i.e. people to stop posting in them) because of the rift it's creating in the Real Jock community. This is why I don't like seeing threads on race.

    When I think of a Real Jock member, I want to remember someone for the fantastic advice they give on exercise, or a great recipe of theirs. But with the threads on Michael Jackson, race, and the numerous other controversial topics, I can't help but think of some members in less than flattering terms. And that's not what I want.

    You say that your definition of a real jock is concerned with the world. I don't agree, but working with your definition — if you do concern yourself with the world, may I suggest tact. Sure, the rest of the world may not see things the way you do and you may want to influence others. But to do so, you'll need to be empathetic and sensitive. Deriding people for their beliefs is not going to work.

    The Westboro Baptist Church has their freedom of speech. They have the right to preach anti-homosexual beliefs on their website, on the street corner, but when they mobilize and spew their venom during funeral services — I believe that's when they cross the line.
  • Delivis

    Posts: 2332

    Jun 26, 2009 11:03 PM GMT
    MtndudeSF said
    lilTanker said
    you don't have freedom of speech on realjock, you have one mans view and how he thinks it should be done, that is all, if he feels something should not be discussed then so be it, he is allowed to censor you in anyway he deems fit that does not stifle your liberties, however, that does not mean you may do or say as you please, since the owner can only silence you on here and you may go elsewhere to be as vocal as you wish on any topic, he isn't stifling your liberties.


    Definitely agree with this.


    Indeed. Needless to say this is a private forum and the guy who owns it can do whatever he wants. Nonetheless i am weary and suspicious of those everywhere tho wish to silence others not just for themseleves (blocking them, ignorign them), but from everyone else.
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    Jun 26, 2009 11:08 PM GMT
    Delivis said
    MtndudeSF said
    lilTanker said
    you don't have freedom of speech on realjock, you have one mans view and how he thinks it should be done, that is all, if he feels something should not be discussed then so be it, he is allowed to censor you in anyway he deems fit that does not stifle your liberties, however, that does not mean you may do or say as you please, since the owner can only silence you on here and you may go elsewhere to be as vocal as you wish on any topic, he isn't stifling your liberties.


    Definitely agree with this.


    Indeed. Needless to say this is a private forum and the guy who owns it can do whatever he wants. Nonetheless i am weary and suspicious of those everywhere tho wish to silence others not just for themseleves (blocking them, ignorign them), but from everyone else.

    it's a sticky point there, everyone has there idea of how things should be done.. but I think more importantly we even as adults are mostly incapable of regulating our self's especially when we have no fear of physical pain...

    Now to others who just call out for a thread to go because they don't want to look at it.. that's another issue entirely, makes me wonder what they do when they see something distasteful in real life and scary considering the point of this site
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    Jun 27, 2009 1:31 AM GMT
    CENSORSHIP......

    How appropriate if the owner of a site like this feels it important to take action if he, "the owner" feels it is jeopardizing his patrons and or on line community. This is not the only forum on the Internet that uses the censors hand. I remember Gay.com and MSN and Yahoo and a host of other sites that felt when hate or other things got out of control they would either delete your account or just wipe the slate clean.

    I think words are powerful. You should know this being a formally educated teacher.

    You should start your own blog or web site or something and build you a following. I am sure you will find many like minded individuals who think just like YOU!

    So like I always say....NO CRY BABIES HERE!!

    Move on....
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    Jun 27, 2009 2:59 AM GMT
    I have to wonder how much time you've spent on other sites, Danisnotstr8. This site is not moderated heavily at all and kills threads far less frequently than other sites I've been on.

    I didn't see the infamous thread you say was killed, but what others have you seen deleted?
  • coolarmydude

    Posts: 9190

    Jun 27, 2009 3:27 AM GMT
    I'm glad that so far, I have been successfuly sequestering myself from all the media going on about Michael Jackson. I get my daily dose, but not an overdose. I knew that the aftermath of his death would turn into the media circus a la OJ, Princess Diana, Anna Nicole Smith. It will only get worse before it gets better. icon_sad.gif
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    Jun 27, 2009 3:38 AM GMT
    Does this site censor? The only threads I see deleted are the ones that violate the terms of service. This site is very lax about censorship, and indeed, its own terms of service.
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    Jun 27, 2009 3:42 AM GMT
    danisnotstr8 said


    I've been actively blogging on this site for a couple months now.

    What disturbs me is that a simple majority of the people here are content to sit and watch the world pass them by. Some of the most popular forum topics tend to be those that garner either fruitless and shallow compliments based on looks, or those that encourage the point-and-click simplicity that seems to govern our daily existence.

    What is a Real Jock? Well, I'd say that a "jock" is an athletic guy with an aggressive approach to living. And "real?" That could mean many things. As a simple modifier, it reinforces the "jock." But I would hope that my estimation of a "Real Jock" rings true with more than one of you. To me, a Real Jock is an athletic person who does not judge frivolously-- one who takes care of himself, is concerned with the world, and who takes the time to render himself the most complete and praiseworthy person he can-- one who is on a mission to realize his potential in every way: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. He is Real.
    ?


    You have hit on a few subjects only one of which is censorship. Above your ask what a Real Jock is and I like you line about shallow compliments.

    I'm okay with the censorship as that is the moderators right since it is his site.

    But backing up to your other points about what is a Real Jock. Do you guys honestly believe this site has anything to do with being a jock? Perhaps it helps if you want to LOOK like a jock but it has nothing to do with actually being a jock. Just take a look at the sports threads. There is so little traffic there. This site is good at promoting fitness, discussing politics, many gay subjects and unfortunately a good deal of vanity. No one really discuss their passion for a sport, unless you consider going to the gym a sport. I've tried to meet surfers on this site and didn't get a single response to a thread. I've exchanged a few emails with a whopping two other whitewater kayakers.

    I participate in many forums on other athletic sites and have met a ton of fellow paddlers both the river kind and the surfing ones. When I discovered this site I honestly thought I could meet some fellow gay athletes. But I suppose a gay community that is truly athletically inclined just doesn't exist. After all, with so many people chasing jock fantasies, it is not important how well you do a sport but how good you look doing it.

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    Jun 27, 2009 3:49 AM GMT
    There is one thing i have said in the past that still rings true. Threads based on race, religion, politics, did i mention race, and even tasteless Micheal Jackson jokes exist for one sole purpose...to start some sh*t. Dont get bent when you go looking for the dog and bites your @ss.
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    Jun 27, 2009 3:51 AM GMT
    I am not one to report controversial topics even the ones I personally find offensive, like the ones having a subliminal racist undertone against Latinos and other minorities by a few but popular members of this website!

    I also believe the only way to really get know people is to allow them express how they feel even if their opinions could hurt my sensitivities, that way I get to know which member to avoid or even put on the "Ignore mode" list, that easy!!

    I have a theory that had proven true 100% of the time!! anyone capable of making fun of another person's misfortune or tragedy must be a horrible person in real life not deserving of any respect or attention whatsoever!!


    ♥ Leandro ♥
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    Jun 27, 2009 4:01 AM GMT
    friendormateBut I suppose a gay community that is truly athletically inclined just doesn't exist.


    I assume you've checked out outsports.com.
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    Jun 27, 2009 4:07 AM GMT
    Censorship is almost always not good. It causes rebellion.

    Yesterday, there were folks complaining, here, on RJ, about reflections upon Michael Jackson which were realistic, and not falsely optimistic. In fact, one person complained so loudly that the entire topic(s) was removed. (I'm sure Chris didn't want to deal with the whining.)

    In the case of MJ, there was a long history of civil suits being settled, gossip, and his own behavior, which raised lots of questions. It was legitimate, and fair, to put forth the notion that while MJ was an entertainer who made money, and influenced cable television and popular culture, he, in almost anyone's eyes, was not a role model for young people, and it speaks to how our popular culture often confuses its priorities.

    Society's sensibilities vary from moment to moment, I suppose.

    Although, I think false belief systems are stupid, I would never suppress someone's viewpoint about them.

    For humans to evolve as a species, logic, and open discussion, need to prevail.

    Humans, we're reminded, are often not clear thinking.
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    Jun 27, 2009 4:15 AM GMT
    And furthermore...

    Had you put up that post a week ago, there would have been very little conflict. And thats what you would have done if it were so "innocent" as you claim. But the fact that you put it up hours after the man died tells me one thing, you were looking for attention. Congratulations you found it. Pat yourself on the back. Everyone knows who you are now so mission accomplished right?


    To friendormate:

    I have stood on the pulpit in the church of athletic endeavors and preached fire and brimstone where my sport passions are concerned. I have argued with bodybuilders on this site about the difference between them and "athletes". I have passion leaking out of my ears when it comes to sports.

    The conclusion i have come to is this: I am going to run my next marathon, catch my next touchdown, grab my next rebound, and run my next mile with or without another "gay athlete" present. I dont go "looking" for gay athletes like i dont go "looking" for love. Just like the with the rest of my life, no other person out there is going to make me complete or compete so im gonna do me.

    There are other gay athletes out there but they are not posting to forums on websites. They are pursuing their endeavors and you should do the same. I have accepted the fact that actual "athletes" that are gay are few and far between so instead of chasing them, I just try to be the best at what i do and the rest will take care of itself. I wish you luck in your pursuits, athletic and otherwise.
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    Jun 27, 2009 4:27 AM GMT
    friendormate said
    danisnotstr8 said


    I've been actively blogging on this site for a couple months now.

    What disturbs me is that a simple majority of the people here are content to sit and watch the world pass them by. Some of the most popular forum topics tend to be those that garner either fruitless and shallow compliments based on looks, or those that encourage the point-and-click simplicity that seems to govern our daily existence.

    What is a Real Jock? Well, I'd say that a "jock" is an athletic guy with an aggressive approach to living. And "real?" That could mean many things. As a simple modifier, it reinforces the "jock." But I would hope that my estimation of a "Real Jock" rings true with more than one of you. To me, a Real Jock is an athletic person who does not judge frivolously-- one who takes care of himself, is concerned with the world, and who takes the time to render himself the most complete and praiseworthy person he can-- one who is on a mission to realize his potential in every way: physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. He is Real.
    ?


    You have hit on a few subjects only one of which is censorship. Above your ask what a Real Jock is and I like you line about shallow compliments.

    I'm okay with the censorship as that is the moderators right since it is his site.

    But backing up to your other points about what is a Real Jock. Do you guys honestly believe this site has anything to do with being a jock? Perhaps it helps if you want to LOOK like a jock but it has nothing to do with actually being a jock. Just take a look at the sports threads. There is so little traffic there. This site is good at promoting fitness, discussing politics, many gay subjects and unfortunately a good deal of vanity. No one really discuss their passion for a sport, unless you consider going to the gym a sport. I've tried to meet surfers on this site and didn't get a single response to a thread. I've exchanged a few emails with a whopping two other whitewater kayakers.

    I participate in many forums on other athletic sites and have met a ton of fellow paddlers both the river kind and the surfing ones. When I discovered this site I honestly thought I could meet some fellow gay athletes. But I suppose a gay community that is truly athletically inclined just doesn't exist. After all, with so many people chasing jock fantasies, it is not important how well you do a sport but how good you look doing it.



    RJ started out as a jock site, and has some great work. There is some very good content for those want to use it; a plethora of resources. However, it's also gotten down to eye candy for queeny guys who are in search of unconditional acceptance because they identify as gay / bi, and are not even close to athletic.

    I understand your cynicism.

    Here's a lesson from your college statistics class:
    The larger the sample, the more the deviation.

    You should maintain and optimistic attitude and sort through the noise.

    There are some TRUE ATHLETES, of all ages, that are confident, accomplished, secure, and amiable, all over this site, but, yes, there are also those in search of eye candy, and who have no interest in being athletic, and those that are fairies, and want validation from the masses because of how they identify sexually. There are also those who are head-fucked with adoration, are incredibly submissive, etc. Consider it NOISE.

    To me, being gay / bi has little to do with being an athlete, and should be a non-issue in the game.

    One of my closest friends is a "straight" swinger. His remark to me: "You're the coolest gay guy I know."

    My life does NOT revolve around my sexuality.

    Remember: just because someone is a certain color, socio-economic group, gender, lives in a certain part of the world, has a certain sexuality, it does NOT obligate you to be all-accepting and to throw judgment out the window. That's prejudice of the worst kind.
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    Jun 27, 2009 4:27 AM GMT
    ObsceneWish said
    friendormateBut I suppose a gay community that is truly athletically inclined just doesn't exist.


    I assume you've checked out outsports.com.


    I use to post there a lot but it seemed to die off quite a bit. It is more about being a gay sports fan but that is at least a start.
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    Jun 27, 2009 4:43 AM GMT
    To Chucky and Runsupport. No my life does not revolve around my sexuality. Quite the opposite. I seem to be drifting further away from gay men with age because our interests are so different. My sport requires a team effort and so I have met plenty of straight men and one woman to paddle with. And yes Runsupport I do my sports as much as the aches and pains allow me to.

    I've met some real cool guys paddling and can't help but wish it could be so easy with gay men. There is this whole solidarity feeling you get when the adrenaline buzz gets going. Sports, ( and I would add music, the arts and any other passion) are such a great way for men to bond and many gay men have a lot to learn about non sexual male bonding.
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    Jun 27, 2009 4:58 AM GMT
    aaaaaayy saaaaaaaaantooooo!!

    they deleted his thread and now he's the one who's whining! icon_eek.gif
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    Jun 27, 2009 5:04 AM GMT
    Rj doesn't moderate forums. If a thread is deleted it is because it is REPORTED either by the original poster (who reports it for deletion) or by someone who feels it violates ToS.
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    Jun 28, 2009 7:46 PM GMT
    friendormate saidTo Chucky and Runsupport. No my life does not revolve around my sexuality. Quite the opposite. I seem to be drifting further away from gay men with age because our interests are so different. My sport requires a team effort and so I have met plenty of straight men and one woman to paddle with. And yes Runsupport I do my sports as much as the aches and pains allow me to.

    I've met some real cool guys paddling and can't help but wish it could be so easy with gay men. There is this whole solidarity feeling you get when the adrenaline buzz gets going. Sports, ( and I would add music, the arts and any other passion) are such a great way for men to bond and many gay men have a lot to learn about non sexual male bonding.


    Any accomplished athlete knows the feelings you speak of. You aren't alone.