Hillie saidRecently I started dating this guy and we agreed to go the Monogamous route (cool) Over the past few weeks I have indulged in his world meeting his friends, attending events like empire pride held in East Hampton last weekend as he is a sponsor and his life revolves around a very social scene. Not that I mind any of this but I have No gay friends and feel somewhat off centered.I myself have lots of friends and aquaintances it's just that all of my friends are straight and most of the gay guys that I have made friends with have been online but I just don't wanna start meeting random people to make friends as it might seem a little shady but I don't want to incorporate all his friends as mine. I feel like I should have my own gay friends and not ones that I made as his bf that are his friends not mine anyway. If that makes sense? any advice?
I encountered a similar situation when I permanently moved to South Florida 2 years ago, being a stranger here to the gay community. My BF was a social butterfly, and I met tons of gay friends through him, plus some straight, too.
I take my friends where I find them. I now make my own friends here, and then introduce them to him (who's gone from BF to partner). I have no hesitation to "piggy-back" on someone else to initially meet gay friends in a new situation. And I've done it myself for others, giving them the entrée to my own social circles.
The only potential drawback I see is if you are totally inept socially, and become completely dependent upon this other guy for friends. I'm not that way myself, and just view these things as getting my foot in the door, for which I am grateful. I can take care of the rest myself. But even if you are behind the curve on this, I see advantages for you in learning to become more socially proficient on your own. I would advise exploiting your good fortune.