Serious Question...

  • lookinsingle

    Posts: 19

    Jul 31, 2009 10:04 AM GMT
    So I've been a member of RJ for quite some time and frequently read the posts which vary from hilarious/whatever to very comtemplative, and I love all of them. What I'm personally curious about though, is are the thoughts and opinions that are so readily expressed on forums and "online" chat frequently expressed in real life? It stands to seem that so many guys like to convey this online interpretation of themselves but perhaps, when it comes to their own lives, they're a little more justifying or forgiving/nonconfrontational? Honestly I'm not trying to get flamed, I'm just curious as to how much people practice the advice that they preach? I hear a lot of people with sincere things to say (redvespa, liltanker, charlitos, doug of meninlove and yes even though many people don't like him, chuckystud lol... just to name a few and yes there are a few others that come to mind) and these seem like guys who really live what they say. But tell me honestly, how many of you really put into practice the advice that you're so ready to give?

    Danny
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    Jul 31, 2009 10:32 AM GMT


    I stand firm in the way I feel and at times I'm sure to have come across confrontational and abrasive. What I've gotten so far in my brief relationship w/ Rj memebers is sometimes your both expressing the same view but said in different context. However, your never really sure how ones message is to come across reading a post over the net and their style of humor. I still try to absorb and see if it rains true because I could be wrong? (LOL) I tend to be very vocal in real life so all -n- all I'm pretty much the same!
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    Jul 31, 2009 10:53 AM GMT
    I'm not as expressive online I don't think and I might not be as harshly blunt offline, but, I think thats because in person you get to hear my voice, read my body language and so on.
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    Jul 31, 2009 11:01 AM GMT
    oh wow, I should have paid more closer attention, I didn't see my name hahaha

    and you should see me in my heels.. DAMN I look good icon_razz.gif
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    Jul 31, 2009 11:07 AM GMT
    muchmorethanmuscle saidYeah, and show cleavage in one of your sexy revealing dresses and when you walk in those high heels on a non carpeted floor I can feel your power as you enter a room. icon_smile.gif


    I hope that it's not hardwood floors, I'm guessing the heels would leave marks, and boom, there goes the resale value.
  • lookinsingle

    Posts: 19

    Jul 31, 2009 11:21 AM GMT
    muchmorethanmuscle saidThe list of names Danny mentioned makes me wonder about the true validity of his initial post. I mean honestly, Chucky...sincere? Very full of himself maybe.

    Perhaps if you can give examples then we can start a hot debate. icon_smile.gif


    Well, I just signed by name Danny bc well lol that's my name. Furthermore about Chucky being sincere... I think we all agree that he's full of himself but in his own right sincere, maybe condescending and tactless but sincere haha... I was just curious as to peoples opinion on the question.
  • DCEric

    Posts: 3713

    Jul 31, 2009 11:21 AM GMT
    This is me. I tend to be as easy going in real life as I am on here. I also don't give advice unless I believe it, which almost always means I have put it into practice. My jokes are also just as bad.
  • lookinsingle

    Posts: 19

    Jul 31, 2009 11:51 AM GMT
    muchmorethanmuscle said
    lookinsingle said
    muchmorethanmuscle saidThe list of names Danny mentioned makes me wonder about the true validity of his initial post. I mean honestly, Chucky...sincere? Very full of himself maybe.

    Perhaps if you can give examples then we can start a hot debate. icon_smile.gif


    Well, I just signed by name Danny bc well lol that's my name. Furthermore about Chucky being sincere... I think we all agree that he's full of himself but in his own right sincere, maybe condescending and tactless but sincere haha... I was just curious as to peoples opinions on this.


    Chucky is great for cutting and pasting information on other websites and then inferring that everyone else on here is stupid. He's inexorable when it comes to his condescending ways. I can't believe someone like that actually can have a life like that in person and maintain friendships.

    I think people get a bit carried away on a site like this. But perhaps in moderation it can be healthy. It can be viewed as an outlet for people to vent. I admit that there are about 2 people on this site that I will attack with pleasurable fervor but I prefer to get along. I simply find them disrespectful so I let them have it. Not many people talk like this in person. Especially to my face and quite honestly I'd love the opportunity. icon_twisted.gif

    There are some genuinely nice guys. You didn't mention Redbull. He's the most upbeat sweetest guy on the site. I bet he'd be great to know in person. But honestly I can't verify that anyone here has the integrity in real life to back themselves up in person. I only know one guy from here that I've met in person and he's GuerrillaSodomite. Very cool guy and his kittie cat, Bastard, is very sweet. icon_smile.gif

    Not sure if you're really going to find guys on here that are going to admit that they don't practice what they preach. icon_smile.gif


    I realize that there are a lot more guys on here that deserve credit, I just named the ones that popped into my head at the time. Unfortunately, I don't think many guys are willing to admit that they don't practice what they preach (myself included). My point in posting this was hopefully to stimulate guys into looking at the adivice they give and maybe putting it into practice within their own lives, be it working out, relationships, friends, masc vs. femme, older or younger, top or bottom lol... everyone has great advice on how to break down our social barriers but nobody really seems to want to take action on it. I dunno, maybe I'm just naively hoping for the best in everyone.
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    Jul 31, 2009 12:39 PM GMT
    I usually give the advice I'd give in person and the guidelines I've lived my own life by... with one exception.

    When it comes to advice on coming out and being honest about who you are, I give the advice I wish someone had given me 20 years ago. I hope to spare other people the needless agonizing and hope they can realize "it's not a big deal" much sooner than I did.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Jul 31, 2009 12:58 PM GMT
    I am absolutely the same on the phone and in person as online. Very political, generally positive, flexible, supportive.

    I think 95% of those you read frequently are the same in actuality. Too much is conveyed in forums. I can tell you the RJ members I have talked to by phone in have met have been precisely what I had expected.

    icon_biggrin.gif
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    Jul 31, 2009 12:59 PM GMT
    I agree with you. I think people don't like to be honet or do what they preach. Gosh darn it, if you don't like the guy above you, then say you won't do him and stop beating around the bush.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Jul 31, 2009 1:00 PM GMT
    muchmorethanmuscle saidThe list of names Danny mentioned makes me wonder about the true validity of his initial post. I mean honestly, Chucky...sincere? Very full of himself maybe.

    Perhaps if you can give examples then we can start a hot debate. icon_smile.gif


    Well everybody has another side. Chucky can be sincere and I can be a pain in the ass. I've seen it in Chucky... and Adrien has seen the "pain in the ass" side of me... LOL
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    Jul 31, 2009 1:03 PM GMT
    muchmorethanmuscle saidChucky is great for cutting and pasting information on other websites and then inferring that everyone else on here is stupid.


    icon_cry.gif

    I like Chucky. Well... I've never met him in person, but I've found his posts to be constructive and useful.
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    Jul 31, 2009 1:03 PM GMT
    I donĀ“t do HIIT all the time. I actually just injured myself overdoing it after a break icon_redface.gif
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    Jul 31, 2009 1:06 PM GMT
    Mine are typically str8-forward me...
    I may come across harsh at times but usually that is just my protective mode kicking in when others are getting slammed for no solid reason - I tend to jump to the defense of the underdog.

    I may sometimes be seen as opionated by some, but I'm always open to the other side as long as it is presented reasonably, intelligently and sincerely.

    But then again, I have to admit - I'm not sure how most in here (with exception to a few) "perceive" me/my posts. I do think some don't get my dry sense of humor and some I know have mis-interpeted "me" completely...
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 31, 2009 1:11 PM GMT
    my online personality is a strong reflection of myself in person. icon_smile.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 31, 2009 1:22 PM GMT
    For me it depends on the situation that I am in offline and how comfortable , some situations I am a little more quiet and will hold back. While others I am a little more assertive. Either way , the personality i express online is still my inner personality. It just only comes out in an offline situation when I am comfortable enough to express it.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jul 31, 2009 1:39 PM GMT
    I definitely do live up to the majority of the things I preach on here, from mindset, to relationships etc.

    I do worry sometimes however, because sometimes you really can't pick up on the tone of someone commenting over the internet. Or text messages even.




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    Jul 31, 2009 1:40 PM GMT
    FitExecutive said
    muchmorethanmuscle saidChucky is great for cutting and pasting information on other websites and then inferring that everyone else on here is stupid.


    icon_cry.gif

    I like Chucky. Well... I've never met him in person, but I've found his posts to be constructive and useful.


    Chucky is abrasive, arogant, and maybe alittle to full of himself but that does qualify as sincere because he seems to firmly believe everything he says. So for that you gotta like him.
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    Jul 31, 2009 1:47 PM GMT
    LOL boring old meninlove, the same here as anywhere else, visceral or virtual.

    ....though we will add there's more to us viscerally..I think,,,hold on while I check both of our implanted borg memory cards...


    -Doug of meninlove
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    Jul 31, 2009 1:52 PM GMT
    So true even I'm guilty of not following my own advice I think Alice (of Alice in wonderland) said it best "But that's just the trouble with me. I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it."
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    Jul 31, 2009 2:33 PM GMT
    Well, I'm sincere, and I think other people are. Its generally a good idea, I think, to take people as they present themselves until you find out otherwise, if you do. I would like to joke more on here, but I am usually terrible at iticon_cry.gif
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    Jul 31, 2009 3:04 PM GMT
    i am exactly the same person at work, with my friends, online, or with my family. I seek consistency in my life and I think its healthy.

    I am not one to send my flames at anyone, too much icon_wink.gif

    Like I am in real life I am super outgoing. I am too busy and too stressed out with other things in my life to get all worked up about what people do or say on a website. I do question sometimes those who do. I can't believe some people can get so passionate/angry/upset over posts on a message board. Alas, like I said early, I am not going to get all in a fuss about it, just thoughts!

    I am confident that anything I will say online I have NO problem saying to ANYONE's face. (even this big scary chunkystud!)
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    Jul 31, 2009 3:11 PM GMT
    I'm pretty much the same here as I am in person. I'll leave the verification of that to 10-12 guys here that I've met.

    I try not to give advice that I don't follow myself. If my relating a personal experience as an example of what I'm talking about, I'm always as clear as I can be as to whether it is my direct experience, a close friend or the observation of others.

    I do that there are a lot of guys here that are what you see is what you get, and others who are far bolder behind a keyboard than in real life. That is the nature of the internet and by no means specific to this site. There are as many fabricated personalities here as anywhere else in the WWW.
  • shirty

    Posts: 290

    Jul 31, 2009 3:21 PM GMT
    getfitrick saidSo true even I'm guilty of not following my own advice I think Alice (of Alice in wonderland) said it best "But that's just the trouble with me. I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it."


    Haha - that is a brilliant quote. I relate.