Shake it up! (?)

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 01, 2009 3:43 PM GMT
    Hey everybody, just looking for input.

    My lt partner and I have recently realized we need to shake up our routine/lives.
    Our reason for living in the country has grown up and moved away, our big home is emptier and we are wondering if we need to move to a city and really start shaking things up. We have lived in the country most of our lives, have traveled but are not sure where we should look?

    Where should a couple in their late 30's/early 40's move to who want more adventure and excitement without having to deal with kiddie drama bs? We lead active lifestyles and want friends and new 'family' that are less sedentary.

    We've considered Boston, NY, SF - but they seem very run of the mill. Ireland, Scotland and England sound interesting. What do you guys think?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 01, 2009 10:06 PM GMT
    U.S virgin islands or......NYC
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    Aug 01, 2009 10:15 PM GMT
    My partner and I are both from small towns, his is in Germany and mine is in Texas. We have both lived in many places, often within miles of each other without ever meeting. Finally we did meet a little more than 10 years ago.

    We met in New York after both having lived in LA previously.

    For work reasons I moved from New York to Venice Italy in 2001. My partner came in November of the same year. Actually 9/11 and the insanity of the Bush administration convinced us to give up our apartment in New York and we have always regretted doing that.

    Today we struggle with the same questions as you.

    I can tell you that expat life has a lot of rewards, but it is really a bitch. Eventually, you do lose site of your nationality and begin to live as something else. Often I feel like a stateless person and the feeling isn't wonderful.

    We did maintain a place in London off and on from 2003 to 2009. In fact we finally closed it up in June of this year. Suffice it to say that the Americans and Brits really are "two peoples separated by a common language".

    Scotland and Ireland are both spectacularly beautiful but they offer nothing, or maybe even less, than what you have in New Hampshire.

    My preference these days are places like Provence that have all of the good points of California and more, and are three hours by TGV from Paris or Barcelona, and five hours to London.

    The Napa Valley offers a version of that as does Connecticut. That way you gain entree to the excitement of the city without giving up a yard for the dogs. At least this is how we see it.

    Terry
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Aug 02, 2009 10:44 AM GMT
    That sounds like a great idea ...
    but be careful
    You guys sound committed and it might not Be a problem for you
    but I have seen many couples who have been together for many years come down here to SFL and split up a few months later

    So I'd suggest going somewhere where the distractions ... men distractions aren't as tempting
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    Aug 02, 2009 1:32 PM GMT
    Rio de Janiero

    Big city with the beach right there.
    Cultural activities
    a sexy, warm culture (both men and women)
    great food
    people who laugh and seem to enjoy life
  • modi5mind

    Posts: 20

    Aug 02, 2009 2:04 PM GMT

    Hey dude, if you are willing to leave your native land and try a new country altogether. Consider the caribbean, there are lot of small islands that are the closest thing to paradise. You never have to worry about the hustle and bustle. It all depends on the nature of adventure you are seeking because there are some islands where every day is a party or some with rich cultures than would amaze you but all in all, for me, you never get fed up of the beaches, it provide the best thrills and excitement there is to enjoy.........

    Proud to be a trini
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    Aug 02, 2009 9:48 PM GMT
    GQjock saidThat sounds like a great idea ...
    but be careful
    You guys sound committed and it might not Be a problem for you
    but I have seen many couples who have been together for many years come down here to SFL and split up a few months later

    So I'd suggest going somewhere where the distractions ... men distractions aren't as tempting


    Thanks. We have been together 12+ years and are very stable. We are a family. We know each other extremely well and have been monogamous. Though we are both looking to eventually play safely... together. That's why we want a city with activities, arts and culture, hiking trails or parks nearby, and a thriving gay community where we can make friends and have some safe play are very important.

    We understand the potential pitfalls as well. We have seen many couples move to the country and fall apart - so I doubt it has to do with the number of tempting 'distractions' icon_wink.gif - we communicate very clearly and honestly.
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    Aug 02, 2009 9:58 PM GMT
    UrsaMajor saidMy partner and I are both from small towns, his is in Germany and mine is in Texas. We have both lived in many places, often within miles of each other without ever meeting. Finally we did meet a little more than 10 years ago.

    We met in New York after both having lived in LA previously.

    For work reasons I moved from New York to Venice Italy in 2001. My partner came in November of the same year. Actually 9/11 and the insanity of the Bush administration convinced us to give up our apartment in New York and we have always regretted doing that.

    Today we struggle with the same questions as you.

    I can tell you that expat life has a lot of rewards, but it is really a bitch. Eventually, you do lose site of your nationality and begin to live as something else. Often I feel like a stateless person and the feeling isn't wonderful.

    We did maintain a place in London off and on from 2003 to 2009. In fact we finally closed it up in June of this year. Suffice it to say that the Americans and Brits really are "two peoples separated by a common language".

    Scotland and Ireland are both spectacularly beautiful but they offer nothing, or maybe even less, than what you have in New Hampshire.

    My preference these days are places like Provence that have all of the good points of California and more, and are three hours by TGV from Paris or Barcelona, and five hours to London.

    The Napa Valley offers a version of that as does Connecticut. That way you gain entree to the excitement of the city without giving up a yard for the dogs. At least this is how we see it.

    Terry


    Thanks Terry! I totally get the expat mindset (I have family who is ex-mil and living abroad still)... it's awkward. We're not talking about selling our current home - but renting it out for a couple 2-3 years and spending that time living abroad - but eventually coming home again... but who knows what the future will bring!?? Thanks again! -Peace.
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    Aug 02, 2009 10:09 PM GMT
    KissingPro saidRio de Janiero

    Big city with the beach right there.
    Cultural activities
    a sexy, warm culture (both men and women)
    great food
    people who laugh and seem to enjoy life


    While Rio sounds wonderful, neither of us is fluent in Portuguese, so I'm concerned about the language barrier and potential work opportunities. (I.T./web).

    Plus, I've heard that there is quite a bit of violence against members of the GLBT community? I don't know the details, but I would like to live in a country with laws specifically protecting the GLBT community and effectively prosecuting those who commit hate crimes (I know - the US is not the best at this in some areas of the country!) - but would like to know that where we move is safe.

    Thanks for your input! icon_smile.gif