Devastated after break-up I felt confident about

  • ny247365

    Posts: 12

    Aug 13, 2009 5:42 AM GMT
    At the moment, I have a lot going on in my life - college, work, and extracurriculars and I was also involved in a serious relationship.

    The relationship had only been going on for several months, but I felt strongly about my boyfriend and his potential to be a long-term partner. He was everything a guy could ask for and really cared about me.

    As an individual, I'm still young and trying to figure out what I want in life. I'm trying to figure out where I'd like to finish school, a career path, dealing with some depression and self-esteem that goes up and down frequently, along with the difficulties that come with choosing what kind of relationship, if any, would be right for me later on in life. Overall, I don't really know what I want in life and I'm not fully happy with myself, which made it really difficult to be happy in a relationship, no matter how great my boyfriend was.

    So, I came to the conclusion that I needed to end things so that I could focus on myself and not have to worry about a serious relationship, since I knew I could never be happy in a relationship unless I was happy with myself. While in the relationship, I felt mostly bored and irritable.

    Tonight, I broke the news to him and it did not exactly go as planned. The conversation was very, very emotional. Now, I can't stop crying and I'm second guessing my decision. I feel terrible.

    Does it sound like I made the right decision? Also, if you're truly meant to be with someone will you get back together later on?

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    Aug 13, 2009 2:11 PM GMT
    BlueLinxus said... along with the difficulties that come with choosing what kind of relationship, if any, would be right for me later on in life.
    IMO, you should stop thinking about this particular thing immediately. You won't be the same person "later in life" that you are right now anyway -- you're getting yourself tied in knots over something irrelevent. Focus on the kind of relationship that's right for you right now (and it's ok if the answer is 'none').

    BlueLinxus saidTonight, I broke the news to him and it did not exactly go as planned. The conversation was very, very emotional. Now, I can't stop crying and I'm second guessing my decision. I feel terrible.
    I think your feeling is perfectly normal. Give it a few days and then see how you feel.

    BlueLinxus saidDoes it sound like I made the right decision? Also, if you're truly meant to be with someone will you get back together later on?
    This isn't a 'right' or 'wrong' decision... it's a choice, and it will take you down one path in life or the other. I don't think there is a person that anyone is "meant" to be with, but I'm sure there are plenty of great, compatible people that you will run into over the years.