Aging

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Aug 21, 2009 7:24 AM GMT
    Whats this fear about aging? I know lots of people would like to play the whole "gay community" bullshit, but it's not, it's our society as a whole and it's everywhere you look.

    Why does everyone want to look young? whats wrong with aging?

    I for one am looking forward to it, yeah, I'm gonna get all wrinkled, but that is how it works, your suppose to get old, with age comes wisdom and experience, comes a joy and understanding (hopefully).

    Although indeed I am only 26, I think the only thing I really know however is that at 26 I know less then I thought I did at 18, so, in effect I'm stupider now then i was hahaha.

    I wanna get old, I want gray hair, I want the experience of life and I want wrinkles and crows feet icon_biggrin.gif the only thing I don't want is that droopy neck syndrome that I could live without and I already have to a certain extent hahaha

    Why be scared of something that is suppose to happen?
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    Aug 21, 2009 7:36 AM GMT
    muchmorethanmuscle saidDang, Big B. Isn't it obvious? icon_smile.gif
    no

    I'd hire the 60 year old over the one half his age if he has the skills I'm looking for. A fast sharp mind is made by putting it to constant use, testing it, pushing your self, your mind, never letting it languish!

    If some punce rejects you cause you aren't young enough, they aren't for me anyway, someone so caught up in age is forgetting to live.

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    Aug 21, 2009 7:58 AM GMT
    a plethora of diseases can affect anyone and any age and just because something is, does not make it right or good.

    and air traffic controllers have the highest burn out rate.

    I've met many people well into there 80's who have a mind as sharp as a tack, I've also met an equal amount of people in ther 30's who as dull as a baseball batt.

    The thing thats always been the older persons advantage is there desire to constantly learn, to find out new things, to talk, debate, socialise and generally keep active, physically and mentally.

    And yes, at any point someone in there 60's could develop any numerous things associated with the brain, however, tomorrow, I could be hit with a car, killed by salmonella poisoning, fall down the stairs and any other numerous things.
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    Aug 21, 2009 8:24 AM GMT
    muchmorethanmuscle said
    You're educating me about disease? Big B, please. I've been told I should write a book by all my friends for all that I've gone through over the past 2.5 years.
    Who said I was trying to educate you?

    muchmorethanmuscle saidI said "statistically" this is how matters occur as we get older.
    Statistically I shouldn't make it to 80 and the likely hood of making 60 is pretty slim too icon_razz.gif

    muchmorethanmuscle saidI agree that people hungry for knowledge and learning stay young and have sharp minds. But those people are not the norm. You look at things from an altruistic perspective. I bet if you were to fill a room with 1,000 people in their 60's and 70's that percentage wise they would not be as sharp as a room full of 1,000 people in their 30's and 40's.
    I don't think I'm being the only altruistic person in this conversation. I'd be wiling to wager that if you took the intelligent, witty and smart people from RJ and watch them, at 60, I'm betting a very very very large percentage are still going to be intelligent and witty and smart as heck, I bet conversely if you take the idiots of RJ and watched them, at 60, they are going to be just as stupid, perhaps even worse.
    Intelligent people generally will stay intelligent while yes some decline due to reasons beyond there control.

    muchmorethanmuscle saidAnd what does sudden death have to do with what we're talking about? I'm asserting that the degeneration we experience as we get older is why there's discrimination. And people know this as they age and they are scared. You're only 26. In ten years you'll see some of your friends get fatter, slower. Some will hold up well. I'll be 40 in a couple of short years. With my ominous, and hopefully done once and for all, prior health concerns I choose to remind myself everyday that it's a gift to have lived another day.
    In 60 years, I could be bed ridden suffering from all manner of mental problems, in 60 years, I could be dead, in 60 years I could have taken over the world.. It still doesn't mean I should be scared of aging though does it?

    And what do you mean in ten years? man, you need to meet my mates, there waist lines are already expanding, but that doesn't mean anything and has nothing to do with age, the desire to do something is the important point, some of them have stayed slim, others have stacked on the kilos.

    soon you'll be 40, soon enough, I'll be 30, then 40, then 50 and if I'm lucky 60, I still dont know why society is scared of it.
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    Aug 21, 2009 10:03 AM GMT
    I lost my grandpa recently and he didn't remember my grandmo in his last days!
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    Aug 21, 2009 11:04 AM GMT
    Magnus08 saidI lost my grandpa recently and he didn't remember my grandmo in his last days!

    Whilest it is saddening that your grandfather passed away and I am terribly sorry about that, but I wonder if you have a point?
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Aug 21, 2009 11:43 AM GMT
    you're 26 - I'm 39. I'll trade ya
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    Aug 21, 2009 11:49 AM GMT

    It's all downhill once you're past dhirty-fwhore, I tells yah!
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    Aug 21, 2009 12:29 PM GMT
    Timberoo saidyou're 26 - I'm 39. I'll trade ya

    Well, if I can be blunt with you ma little Timberoony

    In stead of a smart arsed response, why the hell would you want to be 26 again? secondly whats wrong with being 39?
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    Aug 21, 2009 12:52 PM GMT
    True it's not just the gay community that values youth, but it is more prolific in the gay community, youth is more valued, and when you are 50 you will I'm sure value your youth more than you do now, coz at 26 there is still lots of room for growth.

    But I for one have no issues with not being in my 20s anymore. I had a fucking good time in my 20's and unlike many of my generation, I survived them to, and my 30s as well, when so many did not. But a time did come to move on and I did that too.

    But maybe I'm lucky I don't look my age, and never have. I'm amazed people in their 20s still notice me; I even a few weeks ago, had a 21 year old I work with, inform me he thought I looked hot; I truly was not expecting that one.

    But I as a pure homosexual, have no issues with aging. But hay I've also got two wonderful men to grow old with tooicon_razz.gificon_biggrin.gif
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    Aug 21, 2009 12:53 PM GMT
    In many ways it is a shame, youth is wasted on the young.icon_lol.gif
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    Aug 21, 2009 1:07 PM GMT
    I'm a chicken spit away from 26 and the great gay fear of aging hasn't hit me.

    Is there something wrong with me? Should I see shrink? How can I realise that my life as a sexually active gay male is almost over?
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    Aug 21, 2009 1:29 PM GMT
    Thank the stars that I, unlike most, am extremely ok with aging. Yea, I'm 47, cosmetically damaged by some standards and not in the best place in life right now. And yea it could be worse and it could be better. Then again, that depends on me. I am glad I am wise enough to know that things change with age, hopefully in a manner of growth, and while the journey is frought with spills as well as thrills, I am better because of them, rather than in spite of them. I embrace my middle age. Those that won't or can't or fear it as it comes cause me to be sad for them.

    And for those who fight aging every step of the way, self help books come to mind, but keep in mind-There was only one Dorian Grey.
  • SoDakGuy

    Posts: 1862

    Aug 21, 2009 2:09 PM GMT
    Age ain't nothin' but a number. icon_smile.gif
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19129

    Aug 21, 2009 5:40 PM GMT
    Nothing to be scared of, just roll with it
  • CuriousJockAZ

    Posts: 19129

    Aug 21, 2009 5:53 PM GMT
    Ghen said How can I realise that my life as a sexually active gay male is almost over?



    Ha! Thank god I didn't get that memo either. That is not even remotely how it works. You'll see ;-)
  • cityguy39

    Posts: 967

    Aug 21, 2009 5:56 PM GMT
    I'm actually enjoying my forties!!! You couldn't pay me to go back to my twenties, now the thirties we could negotiate LOL.
  • outdoorjunkie

    Posts: 118

    Aug 21, 2009 6:09 PM GMT
    Not only am I not afraid of growing older, I happily accept it. Each year keeps getting better for me. Like anyone, there are challenges in my life and things that need hard, constant work. On the other hand, I'm learning more every day, developing deeper friendships, working towards goals and enjoying myself along the way.

    I think those who have a problem with aging in fact have a deeper issue with being present in general. It's not an easy task, but focusing on the present and not comparing an imagined future self to your present self is an incredibly enriching experience. For one, it makes your life now so much more fulfilled, as you actively seek to better yourself and the world around you (well, hopefully). Having goals and imagining the future in general isn't a bad thing, it's how you perceive your physical/mental self in that future that presents the problem. KNOW that you will get old, you will get wrinkly, you will be less desirable sexually. Just know it. File it, whatever. The point is to learn not to dwell on it.
  • Anto

    Posts: 2035

    Aug 21, 2009 6:13 PM GMT
    Aging is a disease that needs to be cured. There is nothing good about it.
    You can still 'age' and become wise over the years without having your body fall apart in the process unto death - that's what is wrong with aging.

    Eventually technology will catch up and the idea of dying just because our bodies wear out will be a thing of the past, like how people used to die from simple medical problems or diseases that we take for granted today and would never argue that people should die from them because it's just how things are or are suppose to be.

    I don't mean any of the above from a vain point of view, like looks. I just think that it's wrong for self-aware intelligent beings to come into existence then have that be winked out because of something so stupid as the body just falling apart over time because it loses it's ability to repair itself or regenerate as effectively as it used to when younger.

    It's not right and should be remedied, and it will be given enough time and technology. I know I'm probably going to die but it does give me some comfort thinking that at some point in the future other people will not have to suffer the experience of death through old age or the death of others because of old age that I have and will.

    People shouldn't accept it or make excuses for it. I can understand why people do, it's like a coping mechanism in regard to something that can't really be changed right now, but logically and philosophically it's not something that people should just accept and lie down too!
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    Aug 21, 2009 6:29 PM GMT
    I love getting older.
    I've been pining for salt and pepper for YEARS!
    My grandpa is my hero, I'll be lucky to be half the man he is and half as cute!

    I think there is a difference between aging and looking "worn out".
    Confidence and wisdom can be the blessings of age. But those things are seen in how a man carries himself, treats others and treats himself and not in the weathered look of his appearance.

    I'm always attracted to those remarkable men who are 3-5 years older than me because they remind me how far I've come and show me what my potential is.

    I find nothing wrong with fixing the things that I want fixed.
    The most time consuming, costly and physically demanding procedures I've had done are things 98% of the world will never see. This body has to last me a lifetime, I want it to be well taken care of and a lifetimes work of art when it's time to cash in the chips.
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    Aug 21, 2009 7:53 PM GMT
    depends,

    when i was 6 i couldnt sleep at night cause i was extremely afraid of aging cause I knew that after that i was gonna die; even though i understood it was very far away, i was just freaking out cause I also understood it was a necessary process that cannot be stopped, so Id be crying every night cause i was gonna die....

    then i grew up and as a teenager i really wanted to be older, and that happens to most of us, finally i hit 22 years old....and my perspective changed, I feel like time is running way too fast and there are many things that still need to be done, like my professional career. Im not scared of aging, Im just worried about loosing too much of my time without even realizing.
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    Aug 21, 2009 8:57 PM GMT
    Aging is not linear. I wouldn't want to be back in my 20's, because my 30's have been way better. My 20's had been confused, I didn't have most of my friends yet, and my spirit wasn't liberated. This year I turned 40 and I'm in better shape than the last few years as well as having a better job.

    But then when your age is up there the body deteriorates. The additional wisdom no longer compensates for the loss of ability and condition. Eventually one even loses the ability to accumulate any more wisdom, because of losses in brain function. Ever saw the time machine movies where someone ages from normal to all wrinkled and pale and eventually became a corpse that decomposes and disperses into the thin air, all in a few seconds.

    Try to live healthy, exercise the mind and body, delay the inevitable as long as you can.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Aug 21, 2009 9:08 PM GMT
    lilTanker said
    Timberoo saidyou're 26 - I'm 39. I'll trade ya

    Well, if I can be blunt with you ma little Timberoony

    In stead of a smart arsed response, why the hell would you want to be 26 again? secondly whats wrong with being 39?


    If I was 26 again, I'd have jumped on the fitness bandwagon then instead of later.
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    Aug 21, 2009 9:24 PM GMT
    is this a real question? are we serious? "why do people fear aging?" seriously? lol

    its more than the fact that in advanced stages, its hideous- and 'aging gracefully' is bullshit- only remotely feasible for the genetically gifted. its because old= that much closer to dying, and there is no human fear/anxiety greater or deeper than the dread we feel at our own mortality. the Great Unknown. precious few in today's culture even let themselves think about it with any depth; and for only 5 minutes or so at a time, patting themselves on the back for their brief surface-level reflections at their bravery and maturity...
    its fear of death, plain and simple, taken down one peg- old age is a symbol to most, without their realizing it, of standing at a threshold that no one knows anything about.

    and not JUST that, as if it weren't enough- there's the chronic pain, the stiffness, the inability to walk across a mall without getting winded and sore; its the osteoporosis, the fragility and delicacy of the failing body, the inability to enjoy a day at the beach or a jog in the park; its the retardation of the brain's functioning- loss of chunks of vocabulary, the stiffening of reasoning faculties, and even the likelihood of Alzheimer's- the slow death. its cancer and colostomy bags, or the shame of wearing diapers you can't even change yourself. its bed pans and the guilt of feeling like a burden to your family. its the loss of your sensory perceptions- hearing and olfactory. its boredom as you sit in your recliner waiting for people to visit.... and waiting..... waiting really just to die. its feeling left behind while the world spins on and new generations thrive. old age- not just the piddly retirement years and silver hair, but real old age- is terrifying, and anyone who says it isn't are lying out of their assholes.
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    Aug 21, 2009 9:53 PM GMT
    lilTanker - I just turned 40 and I'm excited about my 40s.
    I have a great feeling, as do one of my best friends, who is 3 days older than me, that this decade will be even better.

    I gotta say, though, that I have a slight fear about the ever-increasing likeliness of disease or injury The fear is not that great. It's just there a little bit, and I'd be a liar if I didn't acknowledge a piece of that.

    I have read that people get happier with each decade through at least the 60s. I'm excited about that research that continues to be validated by subsequent studies (of men).