Gay Dating Woes - Giving Up On Finding True Love

  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 31, 2009 8:46 PM GMT
    This is going to sound overly dramatic, but I'm 23, have been out of the closet for exactly a year and a half, and I'm about ready to give up on ever finding true love.

    I've had more than my fair share of one night stands, and each and every time, it ends with us exchanging numbers and never calling each other. There are guys that I haven't hooked up with but we had an obvious mutual connection. I found myself ALWAYS being the one to pursue it further through texts, or calls, and it has never panned out.

    Shit, I want to be pursued for once. I want to be made feel special. I'm tired of having to be the initiator in every situation.

    Then there are guys who give mixed signals, get you all excited, and then break your heart. Guys who tell you how much they're into you but then you come to find out that they have a boyfriend and never wanted anything from you but to get in your pants.

    Honestly, I'm just tired. I feel like I've put in a lot of effort to try to find Mr. Right and it's just not going as I planned. I think of becoming that aloof asshole, the one who just doesn't give a shit. The kind that doesn't give a damn about others feelings, just his own. The kind that most gay men seem to all want.

    I thought about my circle of gay friends near my age and how NO ONE has a boyfriend, and then I thought about older gay men and the majority of them are single as well.

    Me, personally, I'm tired of the games. I'm tired of the anonymous sex. I'm tired of whoring myself around. I'm just tired. It's time for me to be self centered and work on me. If I meet Mr. Right, if not, so bet it because I'm not wasting anymore time investing in someone only to have them play with my emotions.

    Who else is in the same boat?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
    Log in to view his profile

    Aug 31, 2009 9:02 PM GMT
    The_Austonian said Who else is in the same boat?

    It's a very big boat but don't worry, it's not the Titanic, eventually you'll arrive at some destination or other. Also notice that most of the other passengers are in their 20s.
    A year and a half is not a very long time to explore your newfound sexual identity and learn how to form and grow intimate ties with another person.
    In your early 20s the other guys in your dating pool are going through the same process. Be patient, learn what you can from each dating experience, and when you're ready it will happen.