You Get a Hot Guys Number -- How Long Do You Wait Before You Call?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 06, 2009 10:25 PM GMT
    I was out here in Austin last night and met a very attractive guy. As always, I was the one to approach, and he was with a female friend. We started talking, and instantly, it was clear that there was some mutual attraction.

    I actually wasn't going out with the intention of meeting a guy, or hooking up, but when I saw this guy I knew I had to talk to him. We ended up dancing a bit (incidentally, not too far from Jessica Alba, who's in Austin for a film), and then we took it to a more secluded place of the bar.

    We held hands, stayed close to one another, and ended up on some couches. We talked more and there was definite chemistry, so I brought him back to my place.

    We went upstairs and fooled around a bit, then my asshole room mates tried to fuck it up, so long story short, I got his digits and now I'm wondering how long I should wait to call.

    Askmen.com says you should wait a week, and I'm wondering any of you who have tried the weekly wait have had success?

    He likes me a lot and I feel the same, but I don't want to fuck this up by waiting too long or not waiting long enough.

    What do you guys think?
  • latenighter

    Posts: 64

    Sep 06, 2009 10:40 PM GMT
    i used to think 2 -3 days are the standard, bcos you don't appear to be too pushy or too desperate, a week seems a bit too long, for some people, the waiting can give different impression, but my experience taught me it doesn't really matter, if the person likes you, he should not care how long you wait to call, even the same day.... if you like the person a lot, would you want that person to call you right away?
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    Sep 06, 2009 10:50 PM GMT
    In an ideal world, yes, what you describe would be true. But let's face it, dating is an intricate game. The truth of the matter is that I'm actually juggling two other guys as well, so I definitely don't want to come across as desperate.

    I don't know, two to three days just seems too soon.....
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    Sep 06, 2009 11:14 PM GMT
    two days max - the better option would be to call him the next day and say that you had a great time and would like to get together again.
  • latenighter

    Posts: 64

    Sep 06, 2009 11:24 PM GMT
    if the person thinks you are too desperate after you wait 2 or 3 days to call, then do you really want to date this person? what kinda mindset does he have? Is he too busy that he don't have time to date you? does he date too many guys that he can only see you once a month? you wonder....
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 07, 2009 12:41 AM GMT
    He gave you his number without you having to ask then I'd probably call him the next day.

    Just calling to say hello is not a sign of being desperate. It's social networking.

    Wait for about 2-3 days after you call him. Worst case scenario is that he doesn't answer your call but he'll at least have your number and it'll show you made some effort in wanting to see where it could lead.
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    Sep 07, 2009 12:44 AM GMT
    saguaroman saidtwo days max - the better option would be to call him the next day and say that you had a great time and would like to get together again.


    Agree. Call him or send a text the next day saying you had a good time, enjoyed his company, and would like to see him again when he is free. Put the ball into his court, and he hits it back then great, but if not then it wasn't meant to be.
  • jlly_rnchr

    Posts: 1759

    Sep 07, 2009 12:46 AM GMT
    This is the definition of "game playing". If you like him and he likes you, he won't care if you call right away.

    In the future, just give out your phone number and avoid the decision making process of how long to wait.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 07, 2009 12:48 AM GMT
    Are you seriously asking this question?! icon_eek.gif

    If the guy didn't want you to call him, he wouldn't have given you his number.

    I'll give you a money back guarantee that you need to follow your heart and your gut! If your gut can't wait to call the guy, then call him!

    Don't overthink the situation!

    People who overthink things too long miss out.

    Are you a leader or a follower?

    Call him! If he thinks poorly of you for calling the next morning or whenever, then it won't work out in the long run anyway. No harm done.

    If I gave you my number and you didn't call me right away I more than likely would think you were not interested.

    icon_lol.gif
  • barriehomeboy

    Posts: 2475

    Sep 07, 2009 12:49 AM GMT
    I agree. Call him when you're ready to make the meet, or the marriage or whatever comes after.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 07, 2009 12:51 AM GMT
    I woulda called him the second he walked out the front door just to be cute lol....but thats just me........prolly why im single icon_eek.gif wait wuttt??
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    Sep 07, 2009 1:03 AM GMT
    You call him the next day, and keep calling him. And when he ignores your phone calls you grind him up and put him in your freezer.

    It's what I always do.
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    Sep 07, 2009 1:05 AM GMT
    jlly_rnchr saidThis is the definition of "game playing". If you like him and he likes you, he won't care if you call right away.

    In the future, just give out your phone number and avoid the decision making process of how long to wait.


    Ditto to the first part, no to the second. If someone gives you their #, assume that they want you to use it. If they're going to the play the "I'm only as interested as the other guy isn't" game, then fuck 'em.
  • jrs1

    Posts: 4388

    Sep 07, 2009 1:10 AM GMT

    I give him time to think about the fact that he just gave me, a perfect stranger, his number and then I call. I don't have a set amount of time, but I try to give him some sort of notification the following day sometime about how I felt about meeting him. I don't confess an undying love, but instead comment on what feature I liked the most about him in order to have gotten to the point where we've traded numbers.
  • SwimNP

    Posts: 50

    Sep 07, 2009 1:14 AM GMT
    I agree with the above. If I'm interested in someone I'll call the next day, no matter who initiated the number giving process. If they don't pick up, I reserve the right to call/text every 15 minutes until I get a response (Kidding).
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 07, 2009 1:50 AM GMT

    Hey hey, The_Austonian, welcome to Realjock.

    lol, this is too easy. It's simple: If you gave him your phone number when you want him to call? icon_wink.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 07, 2009 1:59 AM GMT
    He gave you his phone number. Obviously, he wants you to call. So call right away. Like the next day. Why in the world would you wait a week?

  • MotorBrett

    Posts: 145

    Sep 07, 2009 2:27 AM GMT
    If you like him, call him sooner than later! Gays are short-attention span theater.

    Brett ;)
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 07, 2009 2:27 AM GMT
    I never understoond why making a date has to be a some science or complicated chess match. It's really about chemistry - either you like him and felt connection (at any level) or you didn't. Do you want to persue it or not? I'm all about making an informed decision. Understand what the outcomes may be and just do it. No complications.

    Alternatively you wait a week - perhaps the interest is there - take another week to actually find an evening within both schedules to meet (now two weeks go by) - hell i'd be moving on by then icon_wink.gif

    But that's just me - heck it's been a very long time since I've dated having been with my partner for maaaaany years - and lovin it! Important to note; we met one evening the next day he flew to the east coast and that day he called for which I admired.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 07, 2009 2:42 AM GMT
    wait 2-3 days and have something planned to suggest to him.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 07, 2009 3:59 AM GMT
    f-in call him when you want too. why participate and try to entertain a game? if your heart says call when he leaves your door, then do it. too often i think we let those we love move further from us. if he doesn't appreciate your promptness or heart, then guess it's time to move on.
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    Sep 07, 2009 4:07 AM GMT
    next day. I dislike the mind game crap. If it were me and I liked you you would NOT gain points for wasting time.
  • Sparkycat

    Posts: 1064

    Sep 07, 2009 5:03 AM GMT
    Why wait?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 07, 2009 5:16 AM GMT
    syd_hockey_79Put the ball into his court, and he hits it back then great, but if not then it wasn't meant to be.


    I really like this thought... to think it wasn't meant to be is such a relief when you could be thinking it went wrong because of mistakes you supposedly did.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Sep 07, 2009 6:52 AM GMT
    I will add another vote for the "why wait?" crowd...

    Send him a text saying it was nice to meet him, your roomies are idiots, and you hope he's having a nice day. Then the convo can go on from there...

    I don't get the 2-3 day or week thing. Say hi, and set up a low key date for coffee or something. If you are both worried about this week/days to call thing then neither of you will do it.

    Just don't text him 10 times to make sure he got your first text.. that might be a problem... =)