Stupid gay Stereotypes in small towns

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    Sep 16, 2009 7:38 PM GMT
    The one gay bar within a 75 mile radius, has everything that is stereotyped. The techno music, the stupidly named drinks, drag queens performing. For once I would like to go to a gay bar that is calm, maybe a live band playing doesn't have to be a gay band, though I fully support them, I just want good music. Some where where I can order some good food a good drink and enjoy conversation and laughter, not having to worry about a bunch of shirtless men giving me the up and down and then realizing I don't live up to their standards.
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    Sep 16, 2009 11:50 PM GMT
    Yep. That sucks. Couldn't agree more.
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    Sep 16, 2009 11:55 PM GMT
    PrinceOfSerenity saidThe one gay bar within a 75 mile radius, has everything that is stereotyped. The techno music, the stupidly named drinks, drag queens performing. For once I would like to go to a gay bar that is calm, maybe a live band playing doesn't have to be a gay band, though I fully support them, I just want good music. Some where where I can order some good food a good drink and enjoy conversation and laughter, not having to worry about a bunch of shirtless men giving me the up and down and then realizing I don't live up to their standards.


    Hate to break it to you, but that's not just in small towns icon_confused.gif
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    Sep 17, 2009 12:03 AM GMT
    Get out of Michigan
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    Sep 17, 2009 12:06 AM GMT
    PrinceOfSerenity said For once I would like to go to a gay bar that is calm, maybe a live band playing doesn't have to be a gay band, though I fully support them, I just want good music. Some where where I can order some good food a good drink and enjoy conversation and laughter, not having to worry about a bunch of shirtless men giving me the up and down and then realizing I don't live up to their standards.


    When you find a place like that it stops being a gay bar and it's just a cool hangout that anyone regardless of their sexual orientation can enjoy.
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    Sep 17, 2009 12:48 AM GMT
    I hate when I go to the circus there are all these animals and acrobats and cotton candy. I just want to be able to go to a circus, have some quiet conversation, and enjoy the good music.
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    Sep 17, 2009 12:51 AM GMT
    Then don't go to a gay bar! Geez.
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    Sep 17, 2009 12:54 AM GMT
    MunchingZombie saidI hate when I go to the circus there are all these animals and acrobats and cotton candy. I just want to be able to go to a circus, have some quiet conversation, and enjoy the good music.


    I see what you did there.
  • mcwclewis

    Posts: 1701

    Sep 17, 2009 1:02 AM GMT
    Open one.... I'll go









    if Im ever in the area.......






    which isn't likely....





    open one here instead.
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    Sep 17, 2009 1:03 AM GMT
    PrinceOfSerenity saidThe one gay bar within a 75 mile radius, has everything that is stereotyped. The techno music, the stupidly named drinks, drag queens performing. For once I would like to go to a gay bar that is calm, maybe a live band playing doesn't have to be a gay band, though I fully support them, I just want good music. Some where where I can order some good food a good drink and enjoy conversation and laughter, not having to worry about a bunch of shirtless men giving me the up and down and then realizing I don't live up to their standards.


    Couldn't agree more. I can't tell you the last time I went to a gay bar because of the setting there. I always end up going to the straight, redneck places, and actually end up having more fun.
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    Sep 17, 2009 1:27 AM GMT
    Some queers just don't know how to behave properly.....
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    Sep 17, 2009 1:37 AM GMT
    chuckystud saidSome queers just don't know how to behave properly.....


    fixed that for ya
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    Sep 17, 2009 1:40 AM GMT
    LOL. Behave yourself, Munching.
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    Sep 17, 2009 2:21 AM GMT
    It is the truth. Who came up with the idea that gay men want to listen to technofied music and see drag queens every night that the club is open?
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    Sep 17, 2009 2:57 AM GMT
    MunchingZombie saidI hate when I go to the circus there are all these animals and acrobats and cotton candy. I just want to be able to go to a circus, have some quiet conversation, and enjoy the good music.

    I understand what you are saying but what if you really wanted to meet bears that could ride motorcycles but you didn't like going to the circus? I'm sure there a lot of bears out there that can ride motorcycles, but how do you know which ones can? Just go up and ask... you may be mauled. At the circus, you know that the majority of the bears there can ride a motorycle.

    If my analogy made any sense it was at the beginning. It kinda got messy towards the end.
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    Sep 17, 2009 3:14 AM GMT
    PrinceOfSerenity saidThe one gay bar within a 75 mile radius, has everything that is stereotyped. The techno music, the stupidly named drinks, drag queens performing. For once I would like to go to a gay bar that is calm, maybe a live band playing doesn't have to be a gay band, though I fully support them, I just want good music. Some where where I can order some good food a good drink and enjoy conversation and laughter, not having to worry about a bunch of shirtless men giving me the up and down and then realizing I don't live up to their standards.


    Thats EVERY gay bar in the country kid, they dont play live music. and gay bars arent pubs, they can get away with being a cheap piece of shit. And gays will ALWAYS check you out at the gay bar. get the fuck over it kid.
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    Sep 17, 2009 5:41 AM GMT
    All clubs, straight or gay, unless they are something like a country bar with the chicken wire around the band, I think play everything from techno to hiphop/r&b. There is place in San Antonio that is called the Bonham Exchange. It has 6 different spaces. I happen to love the video bar with its strippers (guys and girls btw), main dancefloor with the techno/hiphop. the top floor is this big dance hall with mostly hiphop and its where the drag queens perform, and then a few others chill out lounge spaces and an outside bar. I have had a lot of fun there. I grew up on techno cause my dad used to be a trainer back in the day and I would help him with his mixes so I just get in to techno much easier. I have had too may bad experinces in country bars with the chicken wire to remember.... all i know is ive almost been had in the head by a Forty more times than i'd like to admit. icon_razz.gif
  • t0theheights

    Posts: 428

    Sep 17, 2009 5:46 AM GMT
    KyleAD said
    PrinceOfSerenity saidThe one gay bar within a 75 mile radius, has everything that is stereotyped. The techno music, the stupidly named drinks, drag queens performing. For once I would like to go to a gay bar that is calm, maybe a live band playing doesn't have to be a gay band, though I fully support them, I just want good music. Some where where I can order some good food a good drink and enjoy conversation and laughter, not having to worry about a bunch of shirtless men giving me the up and down and then realizing I don't live up to their standards.


    Thats EVERY gay bar in the country kid, they dont play live music. and gay bars arent pubs, they can get away with being a cheap piece of shit. And gays will ALWAYS check you out at the gay bar. get the fuck over it kid.


    I'd have spun that a *little* more nicely, but... basically he's right.
    The scene is what it is. Enjoy it for what it's worth, or move somewhere with more options. Don't expect a gay bar anywhere to be quiet lounge or polite pub. There are lounges and pubs elsewhere if you want that.... if you come to a gay bar, well then be sure that's what you're looking for.
  • t0theheights

    Posts: 428

    Sep 17, 2009 5:46 AM GMT
    KyleAD said
    PrinceOfSerenity saidThe one gay bar within a 75 mile radius, has everything that is stereotyped. The techno music, the stupidly named drinks, drag queens performing. For once I would like to go to a gay bar that is calm, maybe a live band playing doesn't have to be a gay band, though I fully support them, I just want good music. Some where where I can order some good food a good drink and enjoy conversation and laughter, not having to worry about a bunch of shirtless men giving me the up and down and then realizing I don't live up to their standards.


    Thats EVERY gay bar in the country kid, they dont play live music. and gay bars arent pubs, they can get away with being a cheap piece of shit. And gays will ALWAYS check you out at the gay bar. get the fuck over it kid.


    I'd have spun that a *little* more nicely, but... basically he's right.
    The scene is what it is. Enjoy it for what it's worth, or move somewhere with more options. Don't expect a gay bar anywhere to be quiet lounge or polite pub though. There are lounges and pubs elsewhere if you want that.... if you come to a gay bar, well then be sure that's what you're looking for.

    You certainly can find a place that doesn't have drag every night (or any night) or techno music. As far as the boys checking you out and looking you over to see if they approve...... well, of course they will. Why are you at a place that specifically identifies as a gay bar otherwise?
  • kietkat

    Posts: 342

    Sep 17, 2009 6:23 AM GMT
  • bottomline

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    Sep 17, 2009 7:13 AM GMT
    Balljunkie saidIt is the truth. Who came up with the idea that gay men want to listen to technofied music and see drag queens every night that the club is open?


    The Club Kids.. LOL Party monster??!!! get it.
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    Sep 17, 2009 9:26 AM GMT
    Ciarsolo7 said
    MunchingZombie saidI hate when I go to the circus there are all these animals and acrobats and cotton candy. I just want to be able to go to a circus, have some quiet conversation, and enjoy the good music.


    I see what you did there.


    Munchy does lots of stuff like that. That´s why he´s munchable.

    icon_rolleyes.gif

    (still mentally violating you Ciarsolo icon_wink.gif )
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    Sep 17, 2009 12:11 PM GMT
    TrowelMonger saidI understand what you are saying but what if you really wanted to meet bears that could ride motorcycles but you didn't like going to the circus? I'm sure there a lot of bears out there that can ride motorcycles, but how do you know which ones can? Just go up and ask... you may be mauled. At the circus, you know that the majority of the bears there can ride a motorycle.

    If my analogy made any sense it was at the beginning. It kinda got messy towards the end.


    Small town bars, both gay and straight, are like this. You get the motor cycle riding bears, the bearded ladies, the clowns, everyone from the circus. But, since it is the only game in town, you also get retired cosmonauts, the paint huffers, the stock traders, the PETA freaks, everyone.

    You either learn to enjoy what is enjoyable about the bars, stick to the internet, or get the hell out of small town life. The queer race (Homo Superious) exists in pretty small numbers. Your odds of finding someone else that is compatible in that environment is not nearly as good as it is in cities and their surrounding area. So, if the OP wants to stay in a small town, he should learn to accept what he cannot change.
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Sep 17, 2009 12:21 PM GMT
    Here in Wichita, we have a small gay bar called J's. Its a bar (not a club)... when you go inside, you do have booths for quiet conversation, a pool table at the back and a side area devoted to converation outdoors.

    The negative things.... I'm told by some it isn't very friendly to those who don't frequent the place and that when you walk in the door, a number in the establishment turn around and see who's coming in. I know from personal experience, it kind of creeps you out.

    But some of the stereotypes you mention don't occur there...
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    Sep 17, 2009 12:39 PM GMT
    The first gay bar in this county opened approximately 30 years ago. It is still in existance and fits all the stereotypes that you describe. You may forgetten to add the many 300 lb feminazi bull dikes that go there. (Thank god they use them for security, nobody is getting by these girls). Oh yeah and don't forget the smoking lol.

    The place exists initially because it was the only gay bar in the county. Now there are a couple of other gay bars spread around, that don't carry the same stereotypical atmosphere and behaviors but they are struggling to keep the doors open. The old gay bar still has its regulars keeping the lights on.

    I prefer the places where the music is decent, the food is good and the place is not screaming loud and proud. One or two of the metrosexual places opening in the newly refurbished old downtown areas, seem to be the places where some gays are finding refuge.

    Best of luck