Boyfriend forgot my birthday

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    Sep 28, 2009 2:39 PM GMT
    so my boyfriend forgot about my birthday and I dont think he realized it. I'm not upset by it but should I say something or just forget about it?
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Sep 28, 2009 2:40 PM GMT
    How long have you been going out?
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    Sep 28, 2009 2:54 PM GMT
    about a month
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    Sep 28, 2009 3:21 PM GMT
    if its just a month i wouldnt sweat it, even thougth if it was my birthday he'd know cuz i never shut up about being hte birthday boy.
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    Sep 28, 2009 3:42 PM GMT
    a month??????? say nothing

    if he forgets the next one - then say something
  • Stephan

    Posts: 407

    Sep 28, 2009 3:42 PM GMT
    You can gently remind him that it passed, but since it is a new relationship you can cut him some slack. Also, ask him how he feels about birthdays. He may not think that birthdays are that important or have other ideas about it. Asking questions will clue you in on how he views holidays, current events, and life. Its new, and just starting so you Both have equal outs on forgetting and gaving each other time in knowing what is important to Both!

    Have Fun!
    icon_smile.gif
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    Sep 28, 2009 3:43 PM GMT

    hmm, we'll assume that others remembered and gave you cards, perhaps? Leave a couple out on the table....
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    Sep 28, 2009 3:43 PM GMT
    Throw a tantrum. Cash in.
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    Sep 28, 2009 3:45 PM GMT
    Um he is your bf after only 1 month? Hmmm bday shouldnt be that important! Just alittle premature in my opinion
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    Sep 28, 2009 3:47 PM GMT
    I agree with Stephan. Our entire family misses birthdays. I'm pretty sure it's genetic. I even missed my own once. They may not mean anything to him or maybe he just missed it and that's that. Don't invent anything in your head. I'd say ask him, not us. We don't know him. You're going to have to have much harder conversations than that in the future. Consider this good practice!
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    Sep 28, 2009 3:55 PM GMT
    Have you been boyfriends for a month (as in, there is some sort of commitment between you two) or have you been dating/boyfriends for just a month?

    Did he know you had a birthday coming? Is the relationship serious enough to celebrate birthdays together?
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    Sep 28, 2009 3:56 PM GMT
    People forget birthdays all the time, mate, even of people or family members they have known forever. He's only known you a month, so give him the benefit of the doubt that he forgot and don't take it personally. At some point, I am sure it will come up and then he will feel bad and make it up to you. You're 19 and acting like it by making it a big deal.
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    Sep 28, 2009 4:00 PM GMT
    I wouldn't sweat since given the short length of time you have been together. There are times now I wish I could forget my birthday - perhaps then they wouldn't seem to come so quickly ... lol If only it were that easy - "stay young, forget your birthday" could be the new gay mantra icon_smile.gif
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    Sep 28, 2009 4:04 PM GMT
    Perhaps the birthday cards you did receive should be displayed a little more prominently displayed in your apartment!
    I think it only natural that everyone want to be acknowledged on their 'special day'. There is no problem in putting it into the conversation if the opportunity arises.
    By the way Happy Belated Birthday!! xo
  • HndsmKansan

    Posts: 16311

    Sep 28, 2009 4:07 PM GMT
    On the face of it, it looks like pretty negligent behavior..... but different couples have different emphasis.. and of course you've only been together a month.
    If it were me, I might mention it in passing, but if you do, don't do it to make him feel guilty. He doesn't have anything to feel guilty about unless you had talked about your birthday prior and agreed to do something in celebration.

    If you've never mentioned it... I'd not do much except mention it in passing, then move on. He can make up for it at Christmas.... or just every day icon_smile.gif
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    Sep 28, 2009 4:18 PM GMT
    Birthdays are not important period (we're not birth party kinda people, seldom go to any birthday parties let alone hold one). I forget my bf's birthday sometimes just because of being too occupied at work (we've been together for over 8 years). If you're usually not aware of what date it is how would you know if the birthday is today or not. Usually I realize after a few days because of my good memory. Of course I could have some kind of automated reminder but I prefer not to fuss over something like that.
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    Sep 28, 2009 4:21 PM GMT
    meninlove said
    hmm, we'll assume that others remembered and gave you cards, perhaps? Leave a couple out on the table....


    What they said, now it's about subtlety and if it is only a month into relationship, to much expectation.
  • EricLA

    Posts: 3461

    Sep 28, 2009 4:39 PM GMT
    A month is still early. I'd give him a pass this time, but I'd look for an appropriate time to drop a hint, like mention friends still want to take you out for your birthday or something and see how he reacts.

    Meanwhile, HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!
  • GQjock

    Posts: 11649

    Sep 28, 2009 4:42 PM GMT
    A month ... ?
    He doesn't even know your last name yet

    Next year if he forgets I have some relatives in New Jersey who could help ya out icon_cool.gif
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    Sep 28, 2009 4:51 PM GMT
    A month is nothing.

    He doesn't even know you enough to be able to by a decent present.
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    Sep 28, 2009 4:52 PM GMT
    In a month? guy give it a rest. It is a month! Bitch when it's been several years
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    Sep 28, 2009 5:11 PM GMT
    surferdude1101 saidso my boyfriend forgot about my birthday and I dont think he realized it. I'm not upset by it but should I say something or just forget about it?


    LOL. Such a queen. Don't sweat the small stuff.
  • bmw0

    Posts: 588

    Sep 28, 2009 5:27 PM GMT
    Ciarsolo7 saidThrow a tantrum. Cash in.


    Agreed!!! (jk)

    But if you didn't tell him you can't expect anything.

    As far as the "its only been a month" people. It dont matter if its been a week. Some small gesture, if only a card or something should have been shown.

    I would ask him if he knew, and then see what he says, im sure he will feel bad and take you to dinner or something.
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    Sep 28, 2009 5:33 PM GMT
    Anyone else find it a bit ironic that there are a bunch of posters who are verbally crapping on the fact that the OP has only be dating his BF for a month yet these exact posters are people who are currently single or cannot hold down a relationship for more than a week?

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    Sep 28, 2009 5:40 PM GMT
    Pinny saidAnyone else find it a bit ironic that there are a bunch of posters who are verbally crapping on the fact that the OP has only be dating his BF for a month yet these exact posters are people who are currently single or cannot hold down a relationship for more than a week?



    Nah.