if you could write and cast your own horror film, gay or not, what would the screenplay be like, and who would you cast in it?

  • mustangd

    Posts: 434

    Sep 29, 2009 5:05 PM GMT
    as halloween approacheth, what would the screenplay be like that you would write? and who would you cast in it? you can mix and match from previous films and alter to suit, from edgar allan poe to contemporary, the field is wide open.
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    Sep 29, 2009 5:19 PM GMT
    I would use a recent post on here about meeting a guy who is not who he says he is. I would for sure cast Johnny Depp as the guy who is not who he appears, and Mark Wahlberg... because he is legit. That would be another gay horror film that almost all of us could relate to in some way.
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    Sep 29, 2009 5:23 PM GMT
    icon_idea.gif
    A gay horror movie starring Zac Efron and Taylor Lautner, while running and being scared for their life, these two longtime friends discover their feelings for eachother run deeper. lol
  • mustangd

    Posts: 434

    Sep 29, 2009 5:24 PM GMT
    tlmuscle saidI would use a recent post on here about meeting a guy who is not who he says he is. I would for sure cast Johnny Depp as the guy who is not who he appears, and Mark Wahlberg... because he is legit. That would be another gay horror film that almost all of us could relate to in some way.


    interesting, depp could definitely play a sinister alter ego.
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    Sep 29, 2009 5:28 PM GMT
    No matter what the plot, our very own Rocco Giovanni should be in it.
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    Sep 29, 2009 5:30 PM GMT
    Invasion of the Gay Body Snatchers

    Gay people are swifted away under cover of night only to be replaced by their heterosexual lookalikes. When friends start to suspect something is different because their friend is suddenly really boring, all hell breaks loose and the screaming begins:

    itsagay.jpg
  • mustangd

    Posts: 434

    Sep 29, 2009 5:31 PM GMT
    Miasma saidicon_idea.gif
    A gay horror movie starring Zac Efron and Taylor Lautner, while running and being scared for their life, these two longtime friends discover their feelings for eachother run deeper. lol


    they could make a film where current popular celebrities all have cameos, the "raft" vignette from "creepshow 2" would be a nice way of seeing some done in icon_wink.gif
  • mustangd

    Posts: 434

    Sep 29, 2009 5:32 PM GMT
    McGay saidInvasion of the Gay Body Snatchers

    Gay people are swifted away under cover of night only to be replaced by their heterosexual lookalikes. When friends start to suspect something is different because their friend is suddenly really boring, all hell breaks loose and the screaming begins:

    itsagay.jpg


    i like that, you could also turn it around, and have str8 people turned gay, and more interesting, lol.
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    Sep 29, 2009 5:33 PM GMT
    But then it wouldn't be scary. icon_twisted.gif
  • mustangd

    Posts: 434

    Sep 29, 2009 5:36 PM GMT
    McGay saidBut then it wouldn't be scary. icon_twisted.gif


    lol, you're right, but, maybe to the heterosexual group it might be icon_twisted.gif
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    Sep 29, 2009 5:48 PM GMT
    Mine would be of a young saleswoman who works in an upscale shopping center. Day in and day out she is constantly abused by cunty bitter women who hate their lives and take it out on various sales people and cashiers all day long.

    Well, the girl eventually snaps and hunts down all these women and tortures and kills them in the most horrific manner possible. She even poses as a caterer for a party where she kills and serves several of the womens' snot nosed brats to the guests.

    I was thinking of a plausible way to have my young anitheroine obtain some form of flesh eating bacteria, contaminate one of the women's tampons, kidnap and restrain her while she painfully dies of rapid necrotizing fasciitis.

    I was thinking of a way for her to force someone to eat their own intestines too.

    As for casting, I was thinking maybe one of the Olson twins as the lead. They just look kinda creepy anyway. The victims could be any of the women from Desperate Housewives, Melrose Place or any other nonsensical example of prime time vapidness. The talent is not so important as seeing horrific things happen to annoying people.
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    Sep 29, 2009 6:03 PM GMT
    jprichva saidGay horror flick, eh....let's see...

    First you need a crazed psychopath with no soul and no conscience. Any Republican will do.

    He hunts down his gay victims one by one and devises unique and horrific tortures for them.

    The first one is made to sit in a chair and watch old videos of Lawrence Welk. He dies horribly, his face a rictus of sheer terror when the King Sisters show up.

    The next one has his clothing forcibly removed and is made to wear a striped shirt and plaid shorts, with his feet stuffed into penny loafers and encased in over-the-calf black socks. He has a heart attack.

    The next one is a gym bunny, strapped down and force-fed Ho-hos, Little Debbie cakes, deep-fried Twinkies, crispy chicken skin, and enough quarts of high-butterfat ice cream until his stomach literally explodes.

    The next victim is deprived of his ipod, cellphone, blackberry, laptop, and is forced to sit quietly in a chair and read a book. This makes his brain explode.


    You could cast Chucky as a victim. He's tied up and a morbidly obese, effeminate, hiv+ born again Christian sits on his face grinding his sweaty ass against his mouth farting repeatedly until Chucky's veiny stumpy oompa loompa orange spray tan legs quit thrashing about wildly.
  • mustangd

    Posts: 434

    Sep 29, 2009 6:03 PM GMT
    jprichva saidGay horror flick, eh....let's see...

    First you need a crazed psychopath with no soul and no conscience. Any Republican will do.

    He hunts down his gay victims one by one and devises unique and horrific tortures for them.

    The first one is made to sit in a chair and watch old videos of Lawrence Welk. He dies horribly, his face a rictus of sheer terror when the King Sisters show up.

    The next one has his clothing forcibly removed and is made to wear a striped shirt and plaid shorts, with his feet stuffed into penny loafers and encased in over-the-calf black socks. He has a heart attack.

    The next one is a gym bunny, strapped down and force-fed Ho-hos, Little Debbie cakes, deep-fried Twinkies, crispy chicken skin, and enough quarts of high-butterfat ice cream until his stomach literally explodes.

    The next victim is deprived of his ipod, cellphone, blackberry, laptop, and is forced to sit quietly in a chair and read a book. This makes his brain explode.


    if only vincent price were still with us, to reprise his role as dr. phibes, he'd be choice to play out your suggestion(s).
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    Sep 29, 2009 6:07 PM GMT
    Fade in

    The camera zooms in from overhead as we realize that we're looking at the Lincoln bedroom. Margaret Thatcher is sprawled out across the bed naked and we see Ronald Reagan's head bobbing up and down as he is servicing her naughty bits.

    We hear her voice telling him "just don't mention it, don't do anything, that's the beauty of my plan". She cackles maniacally as she reaches her orgasm.

    The door opens and a naked Nancy walks in with a tray full of cookies, Scotch whisky, and qualuudes. Nancy's pouty, "I thought you were going to wait for me?"

    Jump cut to a hospice in Manhattan...............
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    Sep 29, 2009 7:38 PM GMT
    UrsaMajor saidFade in

    The camera zooms in from overhead as we realize that we're looking at the Lincoln bedroom. Margaret Thatcher is sprawled out across the bed naked and we see Ronald Reagan's head bobbing up and down as he is servicing her naughty bits.

    We hear her voice telling him "just don't mention it, don't do anything, that's the beauty of my plan". She cackles maniacally as she reaches her orgasm.

    The door opens and a naked Nancy walks in with a tray full of cookies, Scotch whisky, and qualuudes. Nancy's pouty, "I thought you were going to wait for me?"

    Jump cut to a hospice in Manhattan...............


    I think I need to bleach my brain to get that image out of it now.icon_eek.gif
  • cowboyathlete

    Posts: 1346

    Sep 29, 2009 9:24 PM GMT
    Night of the Flaming Queens.
  • mustangd

    Posts: 434

    Sep 30, 2009 4:58 AM GMT
    UrsaMajor saidFade in

    The camera zooms in from overhead as we realize that we're looking at the Lincoln bedroom. Margaret Thatcher is sprawled out across the bed naked and we see Ronald Reagan's head bobbing up and down as he is servicing her naughty bits.

    We hear her voice telling him "just don't mention it, don't do anything, that's the beauty of my plan". She cackles maniacally as she reaches her orgasm.

    The door opens and a naked Nancy walks in with a tray full of cookies, Scotch whisky, and qualuudes. Nancy's pouty, "I thought you were going to wait for me?"

    Jump cut to a hospice in Manhattan...............


    lol, scary concept for sure!

    pass the brain bleach...icon_lol.gif
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    Sep 30, 2009 5:48 AM GMT
    Matthew McConaughey (purportedly a young Republican) is stranded inside a space pod lost in deep space with Caslon[insert_post_count_here] and jprichva. While jprichva hurls incessant insults about religion, politics, and patriotism at our loves-to-be-shirtless protagonist, Caslon straps down (a preferably naked) McConaughey and proceeds to tattoo LOLCats all over his sinewy body. GuerrillaSodomite, played by Channing Tatum, embarks on a harrowing rescue mission to save McConaughey before his sublime ass is completely obscured by nauseating cuteness.









    Spoiler alert: After capturing and exiling the film's nemeses, GuerrillaSodomite rescues McConaughey who, in gratitude, "accommodates" GuerrillaSodomite in all the right ways.
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    Sep 30, 2009 10:39 AM GMT
    ruck_us saidCaslon straps down (a preferably naked) McConaughey and proceeds to tattoo LOLCats all over his sinewy body.



    LMAO!
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    Sep 30, 2009 1:35 PM GMT
    ruck_us saidMatthew McConaughey (purportedly a young Republican) is stranded inside a space pod lost in deep space with Caslon[insert_post_count_here] a.


    WINNER!