Would you not date someone because of their religion?

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 23, 2007 3:44 AM GMT
    I had a guy who wanted to date me, but I refused him because he's a hardcore Scientologist.

    I probably wouldn't reject anyone because of their faith, but I believe Scientology is merely a sham.

    What say you?
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Jan 23, 2007 8:28 AM GMT
    Well ive dated jews, catholics, rastafarians, christians, hindus, even "witches"...the list goes on. I personally claim no religion for many of my own reasons and i dont understand those who do. But all the more power to them. Ive never found faith backround to be a problem as long as they are comfortable with who they are and stand by their beliefs, i actually think it makes many people better versions of themselves. However, if their religion is getting in the way of our relationship or if it dominated the persons life, i dont think it would last very long. And in terms of religions bordering on cult status (scientology), well, i dont think id be able to take them seriously much longer than it would take for them to start tellin me about their beliefs. You did the right thing, he needs to know that he is being swindled.

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    Jan 23, 2007 5:00 PM GMT
    For me, it would depend on how intrusive their religion was on our relationship. If I wasnt particularly interested in being a part of their religion and it was a big part of his liffe, I would not date him.
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    Jan 24, 2007 12:26 AM GMT
    I find this topic very interesting. My parents were officers in the Salvation Army for most of my early life. Being gay is 100% unacceptable, and often my family would converse at the dinner table about how disgusting homosexuality is ( an ocward situation to say the least). I am not out, but feel almost disappointed in myself. I feel like such a hypocrite, pretending to be a "salvationist" when really it is not what i am,
    I personally couldn't date someone who claims to be religious because the bible quite honestly is against it.
    I am waiting for the day that i can financially support myself and then i am out, and living the life i actually want to live.
  • dfrourke

    Posts: 1062

    Jan 26, 2007 11:46 PM GMT
    As a spiritual person - but not innately religious - I almost have more of a problem with folks who don't believe in something larger than themselves...give it some name: fate, mother nature, whatever...

    Religion - not a big fan...and as Caslon stated earlier if someone could practice their spirituality in a religion and be respectful about my space and choice, then I wouldn't have such a big problem with the difference...

    - David
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    Jan 28, 2007 1:50 PM GMT
    The only way religion would get in the way of my dating someone is if the religion in question made him feel ashamed of what we were doing. The whole internal struggle between the lustful urges and the religious beliefs is not for me. When the guy is so torn apart by it that he feels sexy everytime he kisses you and makes your feel like a conspirator in his deprevation... not sexy.
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    Feb 01, 2007 7:21 PM GMT
    I have a friend who is the director of a Jewish Federation and he has said to me that although his homosexuality would not be an issue per se, if he dated a guy who was not Jewish, that would be a real problem for the Board of Trustees. As a consequence, he does not consider dating anyone who is not Jewish - not his choice, but he feels obligated to make that distinction.
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    Feb 01, 2007 10:35 PM GMT
    Personally, I am an agnostic. And I wouldn't care if someone I date is passionate about his religion, as long as he doesn't try to "recruit". I draw the line on hard core fundamentalists...yes, there are some gay men who are members of such sects. There's too much self-hate involved in such people, usually, and it inevitably will be directed towards their partner/boyfriend/friend-with-benefit/friend/whatever.

  • HotMuscleFun

    Posts: 96

    Feb 11, 2007 8:14 PM GMT
    This is going to be a serious problem within a relationship, unless you share a similar well defined philosophy, your relationship will be unsatisfying and full of problems.

    All religions ask you to believe in totally ridiculous ideas, such as the earth being around 5000 years old, the center of the Universe, etc. That men were made from dirt and women from men’s ribs etc, that Adam and Eve lived in a Magical Garden with a Talking Snake, and that if God doesn’t get his way you will be punished forever and ever, yet he is perfect and he loves you.

    We have tried religion for around 2000 years now and we see the end result, all religion is the confession that we want someone else to clean up our mess, to have someone or something else to be responsible (demons) for our failures and to make us feel okay about it. That we want a Messiah to return and solve all our problems for us and do our dirty work.

    Faith is the worst concept in all religions as you do not need evidence to believe in facts and you must commit intellectual dishonesty in order to fake the fact that you really believe in all these crazy ideas, you would be considered insane if you changed the name of God to Zeus or Jesus to Osirus and spouted off about how he walks on water and turns water into wine and can raise the dead, come on, I think we know better then this, as if people 2000 years ago had a better idea about the function and nature of reality then we do today.

    Isn’t it time we try REASON, Rationality, Science and FACTS instead of Faith? And then see what the world looks like after another 2000 years? Religion had its chance it is a dying concept who’s death can’t arrive too quickly if we are going to survive as a planet. It served its useful purpose in the past, but now it is a worn out useless tool and one we must all outgrow if we are going to make it. We must all be on the same page and be intellectual honest about the methods we use to agree upon and determine reality, Science demands accurate testing and double testing to confirm a belief about the nature of reality, not just because some guy says so, this is not good enough, or you FEEL its right. Well that is precisely why we are denigrated by society, because so many FEEL the bible is correct, yet they obviously only pick and choose the parts they like, because it also says that you must kill your wife and leave her on her fathers doorstep if you find out she is not a virgin after you merry her. Or you must stone your children to death if they talk back etc. All from a so-called loving God. You can’t have your cake and eat it too; you must take the whole pill, not just he portions that please you. Christians discriminate against us with out thinking and without the need for facts, simply because they have faith that the bible is accurate in all of its many contradictions.

    If the guy you are dating is religious and Gay, he is in philosophical contradiction, he is not grounded in reality and is incapable of dealing with reality because of this fact. This is going to be Trouble with a capitol T.

  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Feb 16, 2007 4:25 PM GMT
    Scientology is definitely a turn off! Basically brainwashing and a cult! Don't drink the Kool-Aid, don't buy the blue velvet tracksuit, and forget about the white Nikes...
    In general I don't think religion (real ones) should get in the way of a relationship, unless it becomes a major emotional hindrance.
  • TallGWMvballe...

    Posts: 1925

    Feb 16, 2007 5:30 PM GMT
    I know this is an emotionally charged subject because it is about "faith": that is something strickly NOT logical so is dificult to defend or excuse.

    Over the years I have dated guys of many religions and generally it is ok until thier beliefs cause conflict with being together such as having to attend services so we can't go on trips or plan anything else that day.
    Now, I am much more picky and being very active in most religions would be a deal breaker for me with the exception of Budhists or a few others that are tolerant of our differences and don't preach hate.

    Most of the major religions are really against being gay so it is a mystery to me how gay people can continue to swallow their rhetoric; it's like being Jewish and joining the nazi party in Pre-war Germany.
  • christomax

    Posts: 30

    Mar 23, 2007 4:31 PM GMT
    Two parter for me.

    A) No. I'm atheist, but I believe everyone has a right to their personal beliefs/faiths. However, that doesn't mean I want it shoved down my throat. I'd never NOT date someone based on a religion. I quite often times find that learning about them can be interesting. Doesn't make me believe in them. =)

    B) Why consider one religion a sham, and not another (ie scientology.) That seems sort of hypocritical to me. We all chuckle when Tom Cruise or who have you is brought up or they how Scientology was there for them, or Thetans, Lord Xeno, what have you. Yet if someone talks about finding Jesus and the washing away of sins, if we were to chuckle and point and laugh the reaction is markedly different. Many of the people laughing at Scientologists and would be deeply offended if the same logic were applied to Christianity, Judiasm, Islam, Wicca, etc.
  • christomax

    Posts: 30

    Mar 23, 2007 4:32 PM GMT
    ..sorry...part B) was for the opening statement.
  • Laurence

    Posts: 942

    Mar 23, 2007 4:48 PM GMT
    I agree with Max on this.

    We can all take the piss out of Scientology, as it's so new (1950s) and all very transparent mumbo jumbo. But we seem to shy away from the older religions, which have as little foundation (thou shalt not eat pork etc), because they've been around for ages and so many people believe in them.

    It's all crap and people should believe in themselves and live honest lifes, and not use these silly crutches as reasons for living.

    I wouldn't date anyone who holds religious beliefs, because it is stupid to. Besides what did religion ever do for us Gays?
  • ManAfoot

    Posts: 9

    Jun 05, 2007 2:54 AM GMT
    With the guys I've met through sites like this one, religion was not something that came into the mix.

    Except for the fact that because of my religious beliefs, the furthest I will go with a guy is strictly JO, which is not even mentioned in the Bible.

    The time religious differences would come into play would be in the LTR stage. We would have to hammer out those difference before heading to the alter--in Canada.
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 25, 2007 3:22 PM GMT
    I think I could tolerate just about any religion but islam. Just as long as it isn't pushed on me.
  • Alan95823

    Posts: 306

    Nov 25, 2007 3:33 PM GMT
    I've been on the receiving end of "won't date you because of your religion", and frankly it's not a big deal. What was a real problem was the guy who said he didn't have any problem with our religious differences, but trying to tell me his religion was right and mine was stupid right after we'd had sex.

    So I'd not date someone because of his attitude towards religion, both his and mine. I have no problem being different and discussing it, but when the other person gets insulting the conversation stops.