My success in life has been equated with despair in a relationship. A cyclical pattern that I want to break...or is this just coincidence. I obtained my bachelors and masters degree in nursing and taught in a university for 8 years back in my home country. I had a steady relationship for 8 years at that time. Opportunity came to further my career but it required migration to the US. I left the country and work so damn hard for my boyfriend to migrate with me as well which he found no interest. The relationship ended yet I climbed to the ladder of success in the American health care industry so quick. I became a part of a strong team of nursing administrators. During my early years here in America I met a guy who I thought would be the "man of my life". I had, AGAIN a steady relationship for 8 years. Everything was set from a house, properties both in the US and outside the country; the only thing left undone is marriage. However, 2 years ago an opportunity came for me to engage into medical school. I was very exited that finally I would be able to fulfill my lifelong dream of becoming a physician. We both discussed the pros and cons about my decision. He completely understood. Medical school is very taxing yet I always find time to do what we both always love to do. As I'm getting closer to earn my MD degree, everything just went downhill. Intimacy faded on his behalf and I dealt with rejection by him for the last year. Everything became unhealthy that we both decided to end the relationship.
The pattern that I'm dealing is 2 relationships for 8 years that ended up due to success in my career. I would love to get insights from you guys may it be positive or negative. Thanks.
Cycles of despair. Boyfriends. Break the connection. The guy who truly cares about you will support you in your lifelong dreams and take the chance of loosing you because he is secure enough to know he will not fall apart if/when you leave. Not many men are capable of that kind of love.
There's barely a relationship between those occurrences, let alone a cyclical pattern. Sounds like you've had good times and bad times which would indicate that you've been alive for the last several years.
Self Fulfilling Prophecy? maybe you set yourself up for failure because your first relationship ended after 8 years, I dont think your "success" has anything to do with it, the men in your life have chosen not to be with you for their own reasons, the 8 years could be pure coincidence.
I have a question for you @ER_RNMD. Were the men you dated equally as passionate about their fields of expertise? Think about it carefully. I've found that relationships where the pursuit of my dreams was a bright mirror for my partner's settling for second (or sometimes third) best OFTEN ended the relationship. When both parties are going after personal excellence, the time you spend together tends to be dynamic and positive. When it's unbalanced, one person tends to express how unhappy they are. This is not to say that both parties don't have fault simply that when one is working towards a better tomorrow, one is more likely to be open to addressing and fixing those faults instead of letting them fester. Just wait. The next one should be you get bitched at for spending too much money on your partner which makes him feel bad ;-) Cheers!
