18 yo

  • fitone

    Posts: 276

    Nov 30, 2009 1:31 AM GMT
    An 18 yo at my gym is in the process of coming out. He's a quality guy, has never had sex with men, though quite a bit with women. He approached me, and has asked my advice about a number of coming out issues. We've had drinks a few times, and I think I've helped him with his journey.
    Now he tells me he wants me to initiate him into the world of gay sex. I've made it clear that I don't want a relationship with him, I prefer men in my own age range. He counters that he really wants to have sex with a man and would prefer it to be with one he trusts.
    I'm torn. He is quite attractive and I know we'd enjoy the sex. I think he's a bit smitten, and I don't want to hurt him.
    Opinions?
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    Nov 30, 2009 2:03 AM GMT
    I would try to talk him out of it. If he wants to have sex with someone he trusts, then it should be someone he's been dating for a while. Someone closer to his age. Because if you have sex with him, things will be weird between the two of you. Especially at his age, I think he would develop a strong emotional attachment. And would rather pursue you in a relationship, instead of other guys.

    It's cool that you're acting as a mentor. But having sex with him shouldn't be part of the mentoring.
  • Timbales

    Posts: 13993

    Nov 30, 2009 2:44 AM GMT
    It's a toughie, that's for sure. 18 may be legal, but it would still make me think twice.
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    Nov 30, 2009 3:05 AM GMT
    lol, been there.
    Perhaps tell him he's a younger brother to you, and you consider him like family. (one usually doesn't have sex with family members, lol) So this way he gets a big bro and a confidante too.
    Win win.


    -Doug of meninlove

    PS You can tell him he can come to you once he's dating for any advice and a shoulder if things get difficult. How's that?


    -Doug of meninlove
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    Nov 30, 2009 6:17 AM GMT
    meninlove said lol, been there.
    Perhaps tell him he's a younger brother to you, and you consider him like family. (one usually doesn't have sex with family members, lol) So this way he gets a big bro and a confidante too.
    Win win.


    -Doug of meninlove

    PS You can tell him he can come to you once he's dating for any advice and a shoulder if things get difficult. How's that?


    -Doug of meninlove
    one might be inclined to remind Doug how hot and bothered the older brother/younger brother situation makes some men. ;D
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    Nov 30, 2009 7:31 AM GMT
    It is great that you are giving him advice and helping him out in this process.

    If you don't want to risk things getting messy but still want him to have sex with someone trustworthy then hook him up. You must know a good guy who would love to fool around with a person like this.
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    Nov 30, 2009 7:42 AM GMT
    MunchingZombie saidIt is great that you are giving him advice and helping him out in this process.

    If you don't want to risk things getting messy but still want him to have sex with someone trustworthy then hook him up. You must know a good guy who would love to fool around with a person like this.


    Ew, no. Don't refer him to a friend to have sex... That's so trashy.

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    Nov 30, 2009 10:33 AM GMT
    meninlove said lol, been there.
    Perhaps tell him he's a younger brother to you, and you consider him like family. (one usually doesn't have sex with family members, lol) So this way he gets a big bro and a confidante too.
    Win win.


    -Doug of meninlove

    PS You can tell him he can come to you once he's dating for any advice and a shoulder if things get difficult. How's that?


    -Doug of meninlove


    See they are gone...??? COME BACK.....
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    Nov 30, 2009 1:13 PM GMT
    ThePenIsMyTier said
    MunchingZombie saidIt is great that you are giving him advice and helping him out in this process.

    If you don't want to risk things getting messy but still want him to have sex with someone trustworthy then hook him up. You must know a good guy who would love to fool around with a person like this.


    Ew, no. Don't refer him to a friend to have sex... That's so trashy.



    You must have some pretty trashy friends icon_biggrin.gif
  • Posted by a hidden member.
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    Nov 30, 2009 1:42 PM GMT
    The number of virgins I have taken is kind of sickening. At the same time it was always funicon_lol.gif

    1) So you could have fun with it and deal with repercussions later or...
    2) seems like it's not gonna happen (if you were really attracted to him it would've already) and just be there for him. Less mess.

    18? I think I'd be a little scared of hurting him too, physically and mentally.
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    Nov 30, 2009 1:49 PM GMT
    why does this never happen to me?

    Actually, I´d not do it in your shoes. Having someone older that you can ask stuff is more important, and he´ll find sex easily enough at 18.